❝somtimes i think you are a human
hiding in a dog's body.❞
❇
with his best friends dead, sirius black feels that he truly has nowhere to go. lonely and abandoned, he becomes a dog, and roams the streets aimlessly, drowning himself in...
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Chapter Sixty: Consequences
8 January, 1983
Sirius has been standing outside Elizabeth's room long enough to be considered creepy. But what was he to do when his hands simply refused to cooperate and knock on her door?
After he had stood there for what he thought to be half an hour, the door suddenly opened, and Elizabeth yelped upon seeing him at such close proximity and jumped back, looking like she has seen a ghost. Sirius gave an awkward little smile and an awkward little wave.
"Sirius! she exclaimed, breathing heavily. "Why the hell are you standing outside my door like a creep?"
"I'm sorry," he answered quickly. "I didn't mean to. I just wanted to talk to you."
She stared silently at him for a long time, clearly understanding what he wanted to say. In the end, she nodded and opened the door further to let him in. He lingered uneasily for a while before he slowly entered her room.
Elizabeth drew a deep breath and came to stand in front him, hands over her hips. "So? What do you want to say?"
Sirius wasn't lying when he had told Remus that he wasn't good at talking to girls. In school, he had mostly had male friends, and he had never looked at Lily or Marlene with romantic intentions – they were both sisters to him. Elizabeth was the first girl that he had kissed, the first girl he had considered as a romantic partner. It was only after he had met Elizabeth that he realised that perhaps he wasn't attracted to just boys.
"Can – can we sit?" he finally asked after shuffling with his words for too long. She sighed and gestured towards her bed, where they both sat down side by side, legs hanging over the edge.
"I came to apologise," he told her. He was twisting his fingers on his lap, and his eyes were focused on his feet.
"For what?" she asked nonchalantly. "Have you done something wrong?"
"I have been avoiding you for the past couple of days. I shouldn't have done that. I should have provided an explanation."
"Well, explain now."
Sirius struggled with what to say. He stuttered for about two minutes before she came to the rescue and answered for him.
"Is Remus your boyfriend?"
He sighed. The word boyfriend sounded strange in his ears, alien, undeserving. "He was," answered Sirius. "I left him with his father when things got bad because I didn't want him to come to any harm. And I have been hurting, a lot, since then. I'm not proud to admit it, but I was searching you for comfort, for consolation. I was hoping that you would be able to fill the gap Remus had left."
He heard a low sniff beside him. Elizabeth turned and took his hands. "Look, Sirius. Thank you for telling me the truth. There's a war going on, and I understand people go through tough times. Maybe you've had to endure tougher times than anyone else you know. People make mistakes, do stupid things. What you did, Sirius, I don't hold it against you. There are far more important things to worry about than our relationship."
