"...unrequited love does not die; it's only beaten down to a secret place where it hides, curled and wounded. For some unfortunates, it turns bitter and mean, and those who come after pay the price for the hurt done by the one who came before."
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Samantha
I frantically add the last minute touches in baby boy Sydney Josiah's room. He was coming any day now. He was a few days overdue; 3 to be exact. I'm pretty sure I'm overly prepared but I wanted to be even more prepared then that. I know it's hard when the unexpected can happen but I'll be straight in areas I can be.
I got loads and loads of diapers, wipes, formula, clothes, and everything else I felt necessary for my baby boy.
January and I had been being really lazy, I'll admit. We spent a lot of time just enjoying each other's company. It was so easy to just get wrapped up in our love and forget about all the important stuff.
I did a lot of online shopping to compensate. Boxes were beginning to pile up. January had a session, so, I might as well dig through the mountains of brown cardboard and revel their contents. I can't push it off any longer; the baby has given me extra time already.
I begin to sort through the boxes on the floor putting whatever it was in it's proper place... mostly diapers.
I glance at my watch, only 30 minutes had passed but it felt like an hour. I take a deep breath surveying the boxes I barely put a dent in.
I keep moving along trying the take my time. I didn't want to over work myself but it needed to be done like yesterday. I play some tunes on for motivation and focus on clearing out the living room. It was beginning to look like a episode of hoarders and that is not what is up.
Once I was done with all of that I moved to the kitchen washing up a few dishes and wiping off the countertops.
I fix me a glass of apple juice and trot to the lounge chairs outside. The sun looks like it's about to set; that'll be a pretty sight to see.
I relax all my swollen limbs in the wicker chair anxious of what the future holds. The baby is taking his sweet time and the wedding is quickly approaching. I'm happy but sometimes I wonder if it's too good to be true.
I'm probably thinking too much as usual.
I kick off my shoes and snuggle in the seat with my juice. I take a small sip and close my eyes imagining what my baby boy face will look like. I hope not like his fucker dad and more like me. I pray to god my genes are strong.
*
"Samantha!" My eyes flutter open to be surprised by the sight of my sweet pea.
"Hey, baby" I smile instantly giving her a smooch.
"Why are you out here sleeping?" January questions caressing the side of my face. I could hear the concern in her voice but I honestly just fell asleep. I inform her of my mild narcolepsy before asking her to sit with me. The sun was just about to set.
"The sun waited for you because I swore it was setting before I fell asleep" I admit laying my head on her chest. My belly swarm with butterflies- I don't know how Sydney felt about that. He probably was annoyed as hell like 'damn, ma. You see her every day. Chill' but I couldn't help it.
