Chapter 5 - Regretfully Understandable

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BELLA P.O.V

today is the day that I've worked so hard to change. I've worked so hard to become stronger. to discover what i really am.....

I decided looking at my clock that read 5:05am, i should answer their emails.... I opened my laptop and started my email.

Dear Cullen family,

I understand that you left, for the greater good of Alice's agenda. I understand that you say that you love me, but where's the proof? the only person in your family that I am sure that ever loved me, was Edward.

since you left he was the only one who tried talking to me. The only one even after I cut off contact, Edward continues to send me emails, texts and calls. I have them if you would like to see them, or you could just ask Edward.

Esme and Carlisle, you were my parent figures, as you know my parents haven't been my parents in a long time, you were the first people to treat me as a daughter. you guys were the first people who welcomed me into your family, but when push comes to shove, you believed your daughter that was closer to your own kind, over the daughter who has always tried to do the right thing that never set out to hurt anyone. you decided along time ago you would rather have a daughter that was closer to what you are then have me. I've changed, I'm not what I use to be..... there is no room for someone in your family like me, you have made that plain and obvious.

Rose and Emmett, Emmett you have treated my like your little sister since day one. but even you left me, after all your promises, you still left I know I cant get mad at you because your my brother but I am deeply hurt by what you had done. once you, realize that I'm not the same Bella that I'm a completely different person as what you remember and I never will be. Rose, you never pretended to like me, you never acted like I was your most favourite person in the world. I respect you so much for that. although that doesn't mean I forgive you it means I'm open to trying to be friends.

Edward, you are my best friend and the light of my life. but you left me behind, I get it your mate was leaving but you are my best friend and I only got a text saying you were leaving after you had left. that hurt me, a lot. your my best friend. you were able to walk away so easily. its like i meant not nothing to you.

jasper, if you were really interested in being my mate you would have trusted your instincts, instead you trusted that little sluttish fucking fairy. in the end you didn't want me as a mate, you never wanted a weak little human as a mate. but no I'm not the same person i once was. I don't need a mate especially if that mate, never fought for me.

Alice, you finally get what you always wanted, me out of your life.... your home life at the very least. you can have jasper, you always had him the only difference was this time he knows that he is mine and not yours. he knows that if he so much as kisses her he'd be causing me pain. but that pain is better than having him as my mate just because he cant stand the pain that he was causing himself. Too bad your not alive to enjoy it.

Cullen's, I've come to realize that vampires are selfish. they don't care who they hurt, just so long as they get what they want. just look at Alice or Victoria. Edward, i don't think its best if you come pick me up.

Isabella swan.

With that I got up and left, to get ready for school closing off my laptop.

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