Lashton One Shots

Ashly and Lucy

THIS IS LITERALLY JUST STEREOTYPICAL BASIC BITCHES OKAY

O.B.V.I.O.U.S.L.Y. NOT ALL GIRLS R LIKE THIS OKAY I KNOW THAT I'M FULLY FUCKING AWARE. THIS IS A HUMOR ONE SHOT. NOT A DOCUMENTARY.

-----------------------------------------------------------

"Ashly, wake up!" Lucy whispered.

"Never. Sleep forever." Ashly mumbled, rolling over in their bed.

"Come on! It's already past noon!" Lucy complained, punching her best friend.

"Hey watch it! The boob zone and the no no square are off limits." Ashly glared, blocking herself as Lucy slapped her.

"Then get up! You take forever to shower and we have a busy day!" Lucy sighed.

"You go take a shower first then!" Ashly snapped.

"You're such a grump in the morning." Lucy said as she got out of bed.

"Someone's on their period." Ashley hummed as she slid out of bed.

"Can you not?" Lucy rolled her eyes and went to the bathroom to shower.

Ashly went through their closet and searched through the cute and matching outfits.

She pulled on a shirt with matching leggings and put her hair up in a messy bun. As a last touch, she added a headband.

Lucy called out from the bathroom. "Ashly, where's my deep follicle cleansing citrus smelling hydrating conditioner? Did you steal it again?"

"It's by the soap." Ashly rolled her eyes and called back. She applied tan eyeshadow and a black line of eyeliner across her lids.

"The soap in the drawer, the cupboard, the soap container or in the shower?" Lucy called again.

"Which one do you think?" Ashly sighed.

"Help me." Lucy whined.

"Oh for Prada's sake." Ashly stood up and went to the bathroom.

"Here, just use my conditioner!" She handed a bottle to Lucy, who was peeking out from behind the shower curtain.

"But this won't add volume to my hair!" Lucy complained. "I need anti frizz and moisturizer and this conditioner won't do either!"

"You're going to have to shave in the cold water if you don't hurry up." Ashly warned. "Hurry up so we can get to Starbucks before the rush."

"Fine." Lucy accepted the bottle. "Can you plug in my hair dryer?"

"I will if you let me buy a new Iphone case." Ashly said.

"Fine."

~

An hour later, they were finally ready.

Ashly climbed into the drivers seat and applied lip gloss in the mirror.

Lucy got in beside her. "Ugh, turn up the heat in here, what is it, like, twenty below? I hate fall."

They shared twin looks of excitement. "But fall means pumpkin spice lattes!" They squealed happily.

Ashly started the car and they drove to Starbucks.

"Omg, did you see what Kaitlyn posted on Facebook? She's such a slut with Jason." Lucy gossiped as she went through her phone.

"Ugh, how ratchet." Ashly agreed as they pulled into the parking lot. "Did you hear Jason got another girl pregnant?"

"Yeah, he's horrible." Lucy slapped Ashlys arm. "But hes so cute!"

"I know right! I like literally can't even!" Ashly giggled.

They went inside and ordered their drinks.

"Hey, look over there! Is that Sabrina?" Lucy whispered suddenly. "With Jason?"

Ashly looked over. "Omg it is! Is she the pregnant girl?"

"I dont know, go ask!" Lucy giggled.

"Omg Lucy! Im not going to ask a girl if shes pregnant!" Ashly laughed. "You go do it."

"Omg no way, Jason's coming over here!" Lucy squealed.

"Hey girls." Jason winked at them as he walked by.

"H-hi Jason." Ashly and Lucy said breathlessly.

When he passed, they turned to each other and screamed.

"He's such a man whore!"

"But so hot!"

"So hot!"

They grabbed their drinks and ran to the car.

"Okay, so like, yesterday, I was at the park you know, and like, this guy came up to me and he was like soooooo gay. Like, his voice was high and he was super cute, but he was so gay." Lucy said as Ashly drove to the mall.

"How gay?" Ashly asked.

"On a scale of pasta noodles to Harry Styles, he was a total seven." Lucy giggled.

Ashly nearly slammed on the brakes. "A seven?! Omg, he totally likes you then!"

"Nuh uh, who would like me? Im ugly and I'm fat!" Lucy wailed. "I don't deserve this!" She drank a sip of her coffee before throwing it away.

"No Lucy boo, no! You don't throw away a full cup of Starbucks frappachino extra espresso mocha hot chocolate supreme mega deluxe edition super size medium cappuccino fall spice latte with extra hazelnut and chocolate shavings!" Ashly cried. "And you are so beautiful and gorgeous and inspiring and he so likes you! Come on, I'll buy you anything you want from Hollister."

Lucy sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Really? Can we go to Abercrombie and Fitch too?"

"Of course we can." Ashly assured. "Come on." She parked the car and they went inside the shopping center.

"You are like my sister." Lucy sobbed. "I love you, you my bae."

"You my bae." Ashly hugged her. "Now let's go to Hollister."

~

"Lool at these shoes! These heels are sooooo adorby! Im getting them!" Ashly squealed.

"Lets match!" Lucy grabbed the same pair and they giggled as they checked out.

"I would date us." Ashly said as she snapped a selfie of them and posted it on Instagram.

"Ikr, like totally." Lucy giggled.

Ashly posted the picture on Twitter. Love this bae! No homo tho

"I'm tired, lets just go get mani pedis and go home." Lucy leaned against Ashly, her black jean jacket rubbing against the older girls arm.

"Can we go to Chipotle too? Im totally in the mood for it." Ashly said.

"Yeah totes." Lucy agreed.

They got in the car and drove away. Lucy turned up the radio and they screamed and sang along to the song that was playing.

"You're insecure, don't know what for...."

--------------------------------------------------------------

AND THEN THEY DIED

XD no jk, someone just shouted that in the hallway