Love Child... //Matty Healy (ON HOLD)

Chapter20-

"you lying, cheating fucking toe-rag! How could you?" Gemma screams at him "how could you?!" she screams again then begins to sob. It sounds like they're fighting. As though she's hitting him.

"I'm sorry. Gem, please, calm down!" he sounds even more hurt and upset than her.

My hearings back, but i still can't move or open my eyes. I wanna get up, and tell her how sorry i am. I look like the proper little home wrecker here. When in honesty i didn't have a clue he was cheating. I have to tell her that at least. But then again, why's it matter? It doesn't. It wouldn't, to her. I've just come into their lives and ripped it apart.

"if you go with her. Then it's over. I swear to god!" she raises her voice again. I feel my body being shifted onto something. A bed? A stretcher? I don't know where i am now. If I'm still outside, if an ambulance has come. I hear another voice. A male voice now. Asking the both of them what happened and who i am. Matty speaks, i think. Telling them I'm pregnant and answering the question of how far along i am.

"i fucking hate you" she whispers through her sobs. Why can't i just wake up and talk to her. Tell her this baby doesn't have to change anything. It wasn't going to. Matt was gonna stay with her. He was gonna walk away from this baby to stay with her. It can still be like that. It is still gonna be like that. He's chose what he wants now. And now i know.

"I'm coming too!" i hear his voice from a distance, then i hear him next to me.

"w-where am i?" i find some energy to speak.

"in the ambulance. You're okay" he says with no emotion to his voice. Like he couldn't care less. Like he doesn't want to be here. Which is fine by me. I don't want him here. Not now. Not now i know he had every intention of leaving.

"go" i whisper. Hoping he'll listen and do us both a favour. All of us a favour by just vanishing. But i hear the doors of the ambulance closing. And I'm too late. Unless he heard me and just ignored me. But why would he. He wants to go as much as i want him to.

"the baby's gonna be alright, isn't it?" i hear him ask. And his question even sounded a little concerned. If id not known his plan, id of believed him. He'd still have me fooled.

"everything should be okay. We just want to get her in, get them both checked to be on the safe side. She has low blood pressure at the moment so we just need to concentrate on that first" i feel fine! There's nothing wrong with me. I don't want the fuss. I just wanna go home. Be able to get away from him and his bullshit lies!

"how you feeling?" i nurse walses into my hospital room. Offering me a friendly smile.

"fine. Can i go now?" i look up at her, practically begging her. I hate hospitals. I don't need all this fuss "well now your blood pressure is back to normal, we'd like to get you in for an emergency scan. Just to check everything is okay with the baby, with your fall" she smiles at me again. Holding out a plastic cup full of water "let me guess. Drink as much as i can" i roll my eyes as i take the cup "you've done this before" she jokes. I don't add anything else on "how long was i asleep?" i ask before she heads out of the room "couple of hours love" she smiles at me "oh. Is, er... Is the guy who came with me still he-" "outside" she cuts me off "fast asleep. Hasn't moved a muscle. Was eager to know what's going on" she tells me as though its a good thing. Too bad he's gonna be annoyed when he finds out everything is fine and dandy "would you like me to go get him?" she offers "NO. No thanks" i panic, almost chocking on the water "actually, you can tell him to leave now" i smile, seeming pleased and brave that i can now do this on my own "you sure? We'll be calling you in for your scan any second now" i try my hardest not to roll my eyes at her. She is only doing her job "I'm sure!" i ignore the nagging in my head to kick off at her "okay then" she smiles, but it isn't a genuine one. Before she stalks out of the room as though I've annoyed her.

"you ready?" the same nurse walks back in, only five minutes later. I just nod. She flips something on either side of the bed, on the wheels, and the bed moves with a little push from her "is this necessary? I can walk" i complain "just doing my job miss" she seems amused with my mood. Great, this is ridiculous. The doors are pushed open with the bed, and Matty comes into view. Sat up, wide awake in the waiting area outside the room "where you going?" he asks, almost panicked. Standing to his feet, following on behind. I shout "nowhere" the same time the annoying fucking nurse says "scan room" is she even allowed to tell him this? What the hell! "I'm coming!" i hear him say, from behind me. I move to the side, to see him "no you're not!" i spit at him "what?" he says, shock written all over his face. Id say he looked hurt if i didn't already know he couldn't give two shits. He'll only be coming in, hoping to god something bad has happened to MY baby "you heard me!" i shout. My temper getting the better of me. Why is he even making out as though he cares! That's what's making my blood boil even more "I'm coming in Ellise!" he raises his voice too before he starts to chew on his thumb nail. Giving the nurse an apologetic look. He needn't bother apologising on my behalf. If i wanna fucking shout, i will.

We pull up outside the scan room "don't let him in" i tell the nurse with a stern look while Matty looks at me, hurt. Annoyed. I try and keep my eyes anywhere but at him. I'm fucking angry at him. But i know as soon as i look at him, I'll cave. I'll give him what he wants. But why should i. I'm putting my foot down. He isn't gonna hurt this baby. Or me. No, fuck me. He wouldn't be able to hurt me. But like hell is he gonna get the chance to hurt this baby. He's chose his path. He can get walking.

"just relax okay" the midwife smiles at me, trying to calm me down "just the same as last time. A little cold" she giggles. I don't even flinch this time. I'm too occupied trying to get the hurt look from his face, out of my head. The look he gave me. As though I'm the bad one here. As though I'm the one in the wrong.

"god sakes!" i mumble. Throwing my hand upto my forehead, trying my damn hardest not to cry here "everything okay? Would you like me to stop?" she looks at me concerned.

"can you go get him please" i nod towards the door "Matt. He's called Matt" i tell her as she stands to her feet and heads for the door

"thank you" he breathes when he sits in the chair next to my bed. "don't thank me. This isn't for you" even though i have allowed him in, just for his benefit "this is the last time you're gonna see this baby" i keep my eyes away from him as i speak. She puts the machine on my belly, and again, the little blip comes up on the screen. Only this time, its bigger. Its more active. Kicking its arms and legs about "it's a little wriggler" the midwife chuckles, offering us both a smile "yeah" we both breathe at the same time, neither of us able to take our eyes off the screen. I feel Mattys hand on mine, i don't even know if he's realised what he's done. But i don't mention it or look. I keep my eyes on our baby "look at that" she points to the screen to near its arms "looks like its holding a guitar, doesn't it" she laughs then "awwws" i laugh too. Matty stands to his feet, leaning over the bed to get a better look "mental!" he laughs in disbelief. We both look at each other, huge smiles planted across our faces. She wipes the excess gel from my stomach then tells us she's just nipping for the pictures "okay" i reply simply. Still staring at him. Him still staring at me. I bite my lip as i feel his hand on my belly, stroking it, slowly. We both look down, smiling. Then back up at each other smiling. He leans in, so close. Like he's going to kiss me. Then pulls away fast. I don't move. I just hold my breath. To try and stop any feeling of disappointment.. If any was to come. I smile again, to try and hide any disappointment on my face... If there was any. But before i can think too much into it. He's leaning in again, his eyes on mine, watching me. But he doesn't pull away this time. He slowly plants his soft lips on mine. Smiling into the kiss. And I'm smiling too. Kissing back too...