𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐎𝐎𝐍: 𝐃𝐞𝐧𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐁𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐲

NINETEEN: A Few Weeks Later

In my absence those with the authority had declared me a flight risk and ground me to Alpha compound. At first I'd panicked then I was relieved when I learnt that they weren't forcing me to sexually bond or receive the mark from their precious blue blood. The only clarification to my suspension before my trail was that I had to be close by in distance to Brady, so he could maintain his strength and overall health. Under the advisement of our Oracle,  everything else, from seeking the gods instruction on my punishment and Dani's execution had been put on the back burner in favour of all the attention going towards defeating creatures that weren't supposed to exist. 

Just as well, as the days went it also became clear that everyone was curious to hear the motivation behind my decision not to accept my gods' given mate. Numerous fights had been broken, attacks on my family had been reported. Blood signed petitions had been written and sent to the Alphas wanting me to address this issue. However the blue bloods had more issues to deal with and were surprisingly very cautious when it came to me. Sure, the task could've been delegated to the Betas to make me talk. But they were all about prioritizing the pack's safety from outside forces higher in comparison to interrogating me.

It was relieving at first knowing that I had bought time - free of charge - for the new scheme to pan out. But four weeks later with no word from the mysterious witch or Mr. Hannez who regarded me with no acknowledgement each time we crossed paths. I found myself always on the edge of insanity with unease. I could feel the damned curse in my soul drown with heavy secrets that now seemed bigger than myself. One night it occurred to me that I definitely dreaded the feelings Brady would show towards me after the truth came out.

I don't know what I owed it to - age or time.

Brady had been nothing but kind in his respect and hospitality when and where I expected him to be short with me. We hadn't grown any closer but we talked and each time I found myself seriously considering the option to confess it all to him. Somewhere in the fleeting seconds of me confessing it all, I'd be reminded of the benefits I stood to gain from my oath with the witch and the traitorous elder. With him, I could yield to the bond, forget the cuts and be happy but with him I'd stand to lose my best friend. With the witch, I could forgo the bond, move on from him and above all, Dani would live. At some point I'd tried again to get him to lift her punishment, but he'd refused to cancel her execution. The cross on my back was heavy and self inflicted with mutual effort from both us, he didn't realise it but I knew it. Throughout the weeks our pack had been riddled with battles and protests from the general population that wanted answers on why the higher ups hid the existence of witches from us. 

Therefore, the Alpha compound was almost always jammed with busy people that came wounded. With steel barred trucks that stored cuffed witches in the back or suits that handled public relations or legal matters and scurried hurriedly across the compound. Lips tight with secrets only those in the military, council, and relevant departments had the executive privilege of knowing. I was in neither and had been required to apply before I was allowed to volunteer at the clinic where they could best appreciate my skills in medicals. From time to time I'd run into Brady, we'd bant a little about about next to nothing serious, just empty everyday conversation that I couldn't remember yet liked at the same time. Time spent with him or spent watching him proved that up close he wasn't the person I saw him as. He'd grown up into a man, that treated me with a politeness that sometimes crossed to flirting. I found it attractive and I grew to crave his attention on me, however cotton fluff it was. Needless to say, with the rope of the choice I'd made on my sixteenth birthday and my latest scheme I felt less than deserving. 

The better I felt about him the worse I felt about myself and my latest sin.

Sometimes days would end without me running into him, and during those days I felt tortured by my own wants and regrets. I couldn't get him out of my head, I'd often obsess over how he felt about me sans the bond. Then when I'd eventually see him even from across the compound it would be crystal clear that he was my flame. When he'd stop by my door every night to bid me goodnight, I'd stutter because I would feel him everywhere from the tips of my hair to my bones. He was a damn forest fire I'd had the misfortune to be burned by in my failure to contain my emotions.