sequel to "i'm fine"
~
"but guessing by the way you're acting you'd prefer a break right?"
"fine, i'll break the fuck up with you then. don't come to me until you're ready to fucking believe me, okay!?"
he was ready to suffer alone so his boyfriend...
Yoongi was starting to act more like he did when he was younger; especially asking the members for permission like he had to with his father about the smallest things. The members, of course, had noticed this, especially after Jimin had quite clearly pointed it out but it felt weird and troublesome for them to confront Yoongi about it. Jin had especially not taken Yoongi's words from the other day quite as he should've either. He didn't want to turn Yoongi down when he asked for help but in the hear of the moment, Jin was far too hesitant to even figure out how to provide help.
It helped to know that Jungkook was talking with him again but it wasn't known to the members that Yoongi wouldn't actually open up about any more than a tenth of his problems. There were many more issues that needed serious concern but Yoongi chose to ignore that. Obviously.
---
"Namjoon hyung?" Taehyung peered through Namjoon's room. "Can I come in?"
"Go ahead, babe. What's up?" the older replied softly.
"I feel like a prick," Taehyung slouched down on the floor beside Namjoon.
"Hm?" Namjoon's arm found its way around the younger's neck. "How come, baby?"
"I don't want to hate Yoongi hyung. It's stupid that I even do because I've been a bigger asshole to Jungkook and it's really hypocritical for me to think that. But I just can't find it in me to not be angry at Yoongi? Like it was all okay and Jungkook was happy and then he had to go ruin that again?"
A sad smile appeared on Namjoon's face and Taehyung gave into his warm embrace.
"You know, I think we've all been focusing too much on Jungkook that we forgot that other members matter too. And we should be thankful to Yoongi hyung that Jungkook is even alive right now. It was Yoongi hyung that saved him when he ran away, after all."
---
Jungkook was exhausted. Lying on the pleasantly cold floor of the dance studio and staring at the ceiling, he thought about the words his dance instructor had said earlier. About how Jungkook needed to lose a bit of weight in order to achieve a neater looking choreography; especially being it a solo and all.
Obviously, Jungkook hadn't taken it the right way and his mind raced immediately to the thought of restricting the intake of his food. Besides, he wouldn't even have to try too hard; it wasn't like he had fully recovered from last year. Jungkook hardly considered it a problem anymore - it was more like a habit he didn't realise he should get rid of.
His eyes were barely open and his head was spinning so fast that he failed to grasp reality. Maybe he had practised too hard today and should've taken his a break when his instructor advised him to.
He still had to get back to the hotel fast so that he could see Yoongi after a not having seen him the whole day. With that realisation, Jungkook got up to his feet and gathered his clothes before throwing them into his bag.
---
Jin didn't want this again. Being the eldest, he despised there being any kind of conflict among the group. He just couldn't bring himself to stand up for what he thought was right. Which in this case was telling everyone to 'get a fucking grip and grow the fuck up'.
Luckily, Jimin was on his side for once. The younger had also realised how much of a prick he was being just following everyone and hating someone innocent. Now, of course, he wasn't sure of how to actually provide any comfort to Yoongi but he was hopeful that he could change the other members' mindsets so that they could maybe do something together.
Hoseok wasn't sure anymore about how he felt. He didn't want to hate Yoongi - and in some sense, he didn't hate Yoongi, he just didn't feel as caring as he used o. Although there was no reason to be feeling so, Hoseok just felt like he should have something against him just because his bandmates did. However, after the whole incident on stage, Hoseok had become slightly more worried about his hyung and he thought that maybe he could start developing a friendly liking for Yoongi again.
---
"Hyung? Are you out?" Jungkook asked Yoongi over the phone, hoping to meet him soon.
"Yeah," Yoongi's voice was...oddly brittle and gravelly. Sort of like he had been crying and also like he had been smoking and his throat was dry. The scary part for Jungkook was that both of those things were highly possible and were actually probably the reason.
"Hyung, are you okay? Where are you - I'd like to meet you!"
Now, even though Yoongi's tired and drugged mind made it hard for him to focus, he still thought about the fact that he couldn't tell Jungkook where he was simply because he didn't want Jungkook to stop him from going there in the future. But even Yoongi knew that he was in no position at all to drive just then. He could barely figure out what was around him. Goodness, he was so high.
"I don't..." his voice faltered and smoothly ebbed away, only worrying Jungkook more on the other side of the line.
"Okay, okay, just-" Jungkook thought, desperately, of a way to get Yoongi's location. "Put your GPS on, alright? Just put it on so I can find you and you won't have to do anything except wait for me, yeah?"
---
Jungkook hated driving at night on roads where there were no street lights and he was forced to rely on those damned 'cat eyes' in the middle of the road. He drove as fast as he could, time to time glancing in panic at the navigation screen slightly beside him. The anxious maknae was getting closer and closer to the destination where Yoongi supposedly was to be.
Driving further up the road, Jungkook spotted the familiar car an immediately pulled up beside it.
Jungkook didn't know if he was dreaming or not but Yoongi's car smelled strongly of weed and a fairly large bottle of vodka just thrown on the passenger seat. Yoongi barely looked alive. His face was pale and bonier than Jungkook had ever cared to notice before.
The small gap between Yoongi's dry lips made Jungkook find some sense of comfort.
Okay, hyung's breathing - that's good.
"Why would keep getting high and drunk together? That really fucks shit up, hyung!" Poor Jungkook muttered, getting Yoongi out of the car to place him in his own and drive him to the hospital.
---
howdy!
i actually had a really nice day today? i went out for a classy lunch with my family after church and it was all so good!?
like i actually ate without caring much about how much i ate and just kinda had a good time!? i had this milkshake and it was so wonderful (probably too many calories that i kinda regretted later but it's okay) and it was wondrous and the best thing i have ever tasted uwu
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i'm october-y i love love lOVE october and have done since i was a lil kiddo xox
