you're "fine" {SEQUEL}

Disconsolate

Jungkook was out practising for his solo performance that morning which left Yoongi alone with the others, obviously uncomfortable.

Recently, Yoongi was always tired and exhausted and found even the littlest tasks difficult.

Of course, opening up to Jungkook had helped ease him a bit, but most of the things (like how much he hated himself enough to constantly keep slitting himself open) he still kept hidden, afraid he'd drive Jungkook away if he opened up too quick.

That wasn't true; poor Jungkook thought that Yoongi did fully trust him and was ready to help him and be there for him whenever the older needed him. He wouldn't leave him if there was more that needed support; sure as hell not.

Yoongi hadn't forgotten, however, that they weren't even dating right now. And for some reason he wanted to keep it that way. That way, if there came a time where one would want to leave, it wouldn't hurt as much as breaking up or being broken up with. He wasn't being selfish, right? He should get a say in the relationship too, right?

Currently, Yoongi was with the other members, except Jungkook, and they were at a cafe in the hotel. Yoongi was trying to seem normal to everyone, like he didn't feel worthless and horrible in front of the members. He was sitting with Jin on one side of the table, awkward and tense. Yoongi sipped his black coffee hesitantly, burning under everyone else's stares.

"Yoongi, we should talk about that day-" Jin whispered.

"Its okay! Jungkook's helped me so much- it's fine! I shouldn't have been so rude to you that day, hyung." Yoongi cringed inside, he hated pretending so fucking much.

Jin was skepitical about believing Yoongi, although he let him be right then just because every one else was there too and Jin was supposed to be the widest one there.

"Okay. Well, I'm happy to hear that, Yoongs."

Yoongi smiled in response, shortly before excusing himself to go to the bathroom.

---

"What's going on with him?" Jimin asked softly, breaking the silence. "I feel bad for letting him become like that, you know?"

"Well, him and Jungkook are talking and stuff again so something must have improved right?" Jhope joined in.

"He seems fine to me?" Taehyung lied - of course he wasn't fucking fine and Taehyung very well knew that he wasn't.

"He's not. You can tell he's going fucking insane. Haven't you seen how shaky and nervous he gets around everyone? And how most of the time he looks like he's high and almost never seems sober?" Jimin argued - he was the second member who somewhat still liked Yoongi but wouldn't admit it; Jin being the first.

"No, but he-" Taehyung was cut off by Yoongi's voice approaching their table.

"Guys, I'm just going to pick Jungkook up; is that okay?"

Gaining a few unsure nods from the memebrs, Yoongi went off out of the cafe and towards the entrance of the car park.

"See how he needed to ask us for permission? That isn't normal! When will we realise that we don't even treat our own members right? Last year it was Jungkook and now Yoongi hyung? What are we planning to do? Drive him to the point of suicide too!?" Jimin, fuelled utterly by anger slammed his fists down on the table, making everyone else flinch.

Jin nodded. "Jimin's right. We need to help Yoongi. He really does need us right now."

---

Yoongi wasn't going to pick Jungkook up - of course he wasn't. That was just a lie to cover up the fact that he wanted to get out of there because it was getting way too claustrophobic for him. He just wanted to clear his head with maybe some weed and a nice, quiet place to park his car.

Slowly and steadily, without his realisation even? Yoongi's driving was getting more and more reckless and he had had so many experiences where he would just about crash his car but miss it. Yoongi usually didn't lile that he misse d the opportunity while anyone else would have been thankful and ecstatic.

Finally, when he settled in with his cigarette while seated on his warm car seat, he felt light. Free. Maybe even like he didn't mind being himself for once.

Yoongi relationship with drugs and alcohol was by far unhealthy but that was okay becsuse when people had him down, he could always get high on drugs.

---

that pun was unintentional, sorry.

also happY biRthDay hOnGbiN!!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!! BBBYYYYYSJXKDK

also hey this is a longish chapter heh

i am starting to get angry over nothing lmao fun times.

also this bathroom i went to today was really broken but the mirror was massive so it's good.

i'm just broken lmao.

+{not proofread at all}+