All Fucked Up//Jahren ff

Chapter 5

"Ahren, wake up. I needa tell you something!" Joel shakes me awake.

"Agh, calm down, whattaya want?" I say, groggily.

"Listen and hear me out. I was talking to Ryan last night and he convinced me to tell you that I... I uhm have a sorta small crush on you..." Joel says, wincing as if he didn't know my reaction.

"Joel." I say. "You told me yesterday."

Joel looks at me confused. "No I didn't. I told Ryan..."

"You were drunk as hell, mate. You didn't even realize you were talking to me the whole time!"

"Fuck. Well, what's your reaction?" He asks, rubbing his forehead in shame and embarrassment.

"I think it's cute, honestly. I've had a small crush on you since we met, Joel. Suprised you didn't notice yet."

Joel blushes. "Wow. I'm gonna be honest, I got jealous seeing you with that girl last night."

I laugh. "I didn't even enjoy it because I felt bad for you."

"Really?" He says and drags out the y.

"Yeah."

An awkward silence creeps between us and thankfully, Joel breaks it. "I, uh, never thought I'd come out like this to you."

"I never thought I'd like a guy." I admit.

"I've never come out to anyone. I've liked guys before, but not like I like you."

I blush and my heart starts racing. I start to get a little anxiety, I don't know why.

(Joel's POV) My palms start to get sweaty when I see that Ahren looks around the room. I tap my toes to try and bear the awkwardness. My breath is getting heavy as a wave of passion comes over me. I suddenly get the urge to kiss Ahren.

(Ahren's POV) "Don't kiss Joel, Ahren." I tell myself. "Don't do it. Don't mess up your relationship with him." My body takes control and I close my eyes and lean in near Joel's face.

(Joel's POV) What? Why is Ahren so close to me? Oh, dear, he's gonna kiss me. I can't refuse. I place my lips softly on Ahren's rough lips and cup my hand around his jaw. Ahren pulls away after a few seconds. I flutter my eyes frantically. "S-sorry..."

(Ahren's POV) "No, it's my fault. I'm so sorry. I don't know what got into me." I apologize.

"Me neither." Joel's face turns beet red. "You're good at kissing, though." He says, trying to hide a smirk.

"You too, actually. I enjoyed that." I make eye contact with Joel. "I have some bad news, though."

"Yeah? What's that?"

"We have to work today." I say with a sigh.

Joel falls back on the couch. "Ugh, when?"

"An hour."

"Might as well get changed then." Joel says as he heads toward the bathroom to change his clothes. I change my clothes, then Joel and I head out to get lunch before work.

We walk into a local diner and take a seat at a booth. We order our food and start talking. "So, about that kiss earlier.." I say.

"What about it?"

"I'm still confused on what happened. I don't even know what I was feeling then. Do you?" I ask.

"No, I don't, it just kinda happened I guess. A spark just flew through me."

"Yeah, me too. I just went for it without thinking."

"This is gonna sound weird, but don't take it awkwardly, but are you single?" Joel asks slowly.

I nod my head, understanding what he was getting at.

"Do you maybe wanna start a, uhm, relationship? Because I'm into you."

Fuck, I don't know what to say. "Sure, if that's what you want." I give in, mostly out of sympathy.

"I won't mess this up, Ahren."

We finish our food and head to work. Joel works at the register and I pretty much just walk around and help customers. When business isn't going off, I usually fool around with the basses. I pick up a white bass and sit down and play. Joel walks over to me.

"You're good. How long you been playin?" He asks and crosses his arms as he sits down next to me.

"Ah, fuck, I don't know. A year or two. I'm not that good, haven't been trained. I'm just a self-taught bassist."

Joel jolts up out of his seat. "I just got the greatest idea."

"Oh, boy."

"No, really, Ahren. We should totally start a band." He exclaims.

"Seriously? Neither of us are professionally trained. We wouldn't even have a drummer or a guitarist."

"We can find them. Come on, you said before that the reason you started working here was because of your love for music. You said I was a good screamer, and you're an amazing bassist." Joel tries to convince me.

"We'll never be famous, it'll just be a waste of my time and money and your time and money."

Joel pushes his bottom lip out. "Please? Give it a chance. For me?"

I roll my eyes. "Fine. I'll put an ad out for a drummer and guitarist tomorrow."

"Yesss!" He jumps.

"But wait, I've never written a song before."

"Trust me. I've got this. I have so much to write about, Ahren, that I could easily write three albums right now." Joel laughs.

"Okay then. Let's just finish this fucking shift, right?"

"Right."

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