Kidnapped By The Bad Boys

Chapter 44: Feelings Suck

        It had been already two days since Dylan's passing. I couldn't stop crying but after a while I would stop and just feel nothing. I was numb in my heart, mind and body. I didn't know if I would be able to last.  Dylan's last words were haunting me.
    When we told Daniel I remember his facial expression when he saw me. He was scared, hurt and disgusted. Natasha my personal nurse was nowhere to be seen which was a good sign. Xavier hadn't come back to the house in days. Nobody knew where he was. Logan was locked up in his room. Only coming out to shower and eat. Even then he would take his food to his room and not even look in  my direction. 
I looked at myself in the mirror. My eye was slowly healing. I heard someone knock.
"Come in"I said.
Daniel. I rolled my eyes and he shut the door.
"I'm sorry".
"For what".
"Everything I didn't think...."
"You didn't think Dylan was gonna die because of you. What is your problem".
He looked at me with dull eyes and didn't say anything.
"I had to. You were tearing those two apart. You were playing with them".
      I felt my anger picking up by that.
"I wasn't playing with them. You know I told Dylan I loved him as a friend and nothing more. Maybe I do have feelings for Logan. But you my friend, should be ashamed of yourself" I replied anger laced in my voice.
"He died saving you".
"I know that. I love him and always will for that".
I pointed my finger at him.
"But he would've been alive if you wouldn't  have left me in that damn parking lot. You're the cause of everything and I hate you for that" I added.
He looked at me with a stern face.
"You have some nerve".
"No you have some nerve. Your lucky I didn't say what really happened because if they knew I don't think they would want to talk to you".
"Watch yourself little girl".
"I stopped being a little girl years ago".
His breath was ragged and he stormed out of the room.
Whatever I thought to myself.
He left my room door open and I heard the front door slam shut. Meaning the only one left in the house was Logan and me. I walked out of my room and hesitated before knocking on Logan's door. He wasn't answering.
      I took a deep breath before opening the door and stepping in. His room looked horrible. He had several punch holes in the wall. There was alcohol bottles everywhere. Not the cheap stuff either. There were vodka bottles, whiskey and other high end brands of alcohol. It wasn't the weak stuff either it was the strong stuff. His bed was a mess. In the corner I saw a huddled figure.  I instantly knew who it was. I shut the door. I should trust him. Shouldn't  I? He would never hurt me.
   As I got closer to him. He had a cigarette in one his hands and the bottle in the other.
"What are you doing in here" he said his words slurring.
I crossed my arms over my chest.
"What the actual hell are you doing"I questioned him towards his rash decisions with drinking.
"What does it look like darling. I'm fucking mourning in my own way. Not having a party over here".
His choice of words shocked me but I held my composure.
"Drinking is how you choose to mourn".
He chuckled and stood up. I hadn't noticed how close we were. He took one last drag of his cigarette and puffed the smoke right in my face. I coughed. He smirked. What a complete a hole. I wasn't giving him the satisfaction  of me backing up or cowering away in fear.
"I'm not drinking to mourn. I'm drinking to forget. Do you know how haunting it is seeing someone you care about die right in front of your eyes".
"Yes. I was there with you" I replied.
He shook his head and stepped  even close to me. I could smell him. He reeked of alcohol.
"You know something gorgeous. I've seen so many people die. People I knew to and his was the one where I felt actual remorse and guilt".
"You didn't kill him" I stated.
He shook his head.
"I did. I lead him to his death".
I took a deep breath. His eyes were getting teary. He was holding it in.
"You need to stop blaming yourself. His death wasn't in vain"I said putting my arms to my side.
"You don't understand so just get the fuck out of my room"he said backing up from me.
   He turned around going back to sit down in his little corner. He shouldn't be holding it in. I don't know what was going on through my head. Handling a drunk guy who was ten times my size wasn't wise. But he needed my help. I had to fulfill what I promised Dylan.
"No".
"Get out Laura! Nows not the time"he barked.
"No you need help. Let me help you".
"I don't need help. What I need you to do is to get it of my room"he stated still not looking at me.
"Please just let me help you" I begged.
"You know something. You only knew him for about three months and you're crying over him. I knew him since the beginning. What you need to do is mind your own god damn business. Stop crying over him like you knew him. You know nothing of struggle rich girl. You've had everything handed to you" he spat at me.
   My heart broke at those words. I felt my eyes getting watery and I let a tear slip.
"So stop acting like you had it hard and leave me to mourn in peace".
I let out a quivering breath and let the tears fall.
He turned around. His eyes were dark and yet when he saw my crying. His eyes changed. Guilt.
"Laur.."
"Save it. If that's how you really feel then fine. But just so you know you guys put me through some hell. I've been abused mentally and physically. Hell I don't even know if half the scars everyone gave me will ever heal. So maybe yes I've had things handed to me but don't you dare say because I just met Dylan that I didn't feel anything. You feel horrible. What about me huh".
"I...i"
"No let me finish. He died taking the bullet for me. Till the day I die I'll be with the guilt that he died saving ME! You know I was just trying to help you. Fulfill what I promised Dylan".
"I'm sor-"
"Save your sorrys. You and everyone except Dylan broke me. So now I feel horrible to do this but sometimes promises are meant to be broken"I said.
The tears that were running down my face weren't stopping. He looked at me his eyes softening as he saw my state, Turning around I tried to walk away he grabbed me.
"Let me go so I could get out of this room. I can't stand to be in the same room as you anymore".
He let me go.
"Laura please"he cried
"Laura nothing"I spat back exiting the room and slamming the door behind me.