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Everything sucked, I felt like everything was going wrong. My grades were droping dramatically, I didn't want to go outside and I just felt terrible. I hated it that it was affecting me so much but I couldn't help it, I always acted strong but the truth is that I'm weak.

I had stopped running away from the park and was now slowly strolling towards home. I wiped a tear away from my cheek as I sniffed. I almost never cry. Another evidence that it came hard towards me. I grumbled as I walked away further, irritation visible on my face as I was disgusted. Disgusted that Jungkook didn't even know what I was talking about. I never thought he was that dumb.

Jungkook hadn't followed me, I was glad he didn't but somewhere, deep inside I felt sad about it. But who was I kidding, life isn't some kind of fairy tale, reality is hard and mean.

I had arrived home as I walked up the path, I came up to the door and opened the lock as I walked inside, sighing loudly. I trew my coat aside, not bothering to look where it landed as I dragged myself to the kitchen. All I wanted to do now was sleep but my stomach thought different as it made loud noises.

I opened the fridge and my eyes scanned the contents. I grabbed the ice-cream I hadn't finished and grabbed a spoon. Cliché, I know but it actually helped since I loved ice-cream. I let out a small sad laugh as I thought about it.

Walking upstairs I had already opened the lid and dug my spoon in it before putting it in my mouth. I walked inside my bedroom with the bed as my destination. I fell on it and put the ice-cream aside. Looking up at the ceiling hundreds thoughts flooded my mind.

After today I wasn't sure if I still wanted to go to school tommorow like I had planned before. I covered my eyes with my hand and sighed. I have to. I can't just keep skipping class because of him, it only affected me and I didn't grant Jungkook the fun of seeing me struggle.

The scenario at the park flashed before my eyes again. Jungkook actually looked sad? It looked like he might have cried every second while he tried to talk to me. I got my hand of my eyes and shook my head. I can't let myself think that was real, he was so good at acting like he loved me so it must have been a piece of cake to act like he was sad. I felt my vision become blurry again as a coat of salty water covered my eyes. I seriously hated myself for it, being so vulnerable and frail.

I stood up again as I walked downstairs, going towards the basement. I shivered as my bare feet touched the cold stone floor. My eyes went to the wine rack and I hesitated for a while. Alchochol? Maybe it would help? I smirked as I slowly walked towards it and grabbed out a random bottle.

With my hand spasmodically around the neck of the bottle. Closing the door after me I went to the living room, my trembling fingers tugged at the finish, trying to open it. I grabbed the whole cap in my hand and gave it a firm twist before it opened, trowing it on the table. I placed the bottle at my lips, letting the cold wine fill my mouth before swallowing it.

I trew my head backwards on the couch smiling stupidly. "What am I even doing with my life?" I whisper-asked myself before taking another gulp of the alcochol drink.



Author-note
FAKE LOVE IS AWESOMEEEEE
alsoo my favorite tracks are definitly 134340 and anpanman oml

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