Parinayanantaram

Internal war

She left the room and I sighed.

{See idiot! It is all because of you, that she ran away. If only you would not have forced me tell her that! Maybe she would have stayed.
Sorry!
Sorry? Will your sorry bring her back to me?
But don’t blame me. I always do the right thing.
Yeah! The right thing, like keeping her away from me.
Hey! Don’t be so angry with me. Letting her know your feelings is never a wrong thing.
Are you mad? There should be a right time to voice out the feelings.
Maybe! But to show your love towards her, there is no right time. It should be done always.
You expect me to keep saying ‘I LOVE YOU’ to her every time I see her?
I am not asking you do that. But there are tiny actions that can tell her that you care for her.
Like what?
You will know it, if you really love her.
Ugh! You are so irritating. Why do you complicate everything?
Impressing a girl is not so easy. You need to give your everything.
I don’t need to impress any girl. You are more than enough for me.
Do you mean to say …
Yeah … you are no less than a girl.
Are you insulting me or complementing me?
Whatever you think.}
I groaned and shut my eyes.

After a while, I heard the door open and a smile crept on my lips as I felt her settle beside me on the bed.

***

I am now smiling like an idiot.
The air hostess, who was passing by, looked at me like I was insane. But what can I do? A simple thought about her, makes me smile. I am getting insane because of her.

{Beware Hari! You have already lost your heart to her. Now don’t lose your mind too.
You shut up. It is all because of you. You yourself gave her too much lenience, allowing her to control me.
Don’t scold me man. I did the right thing. I chose the perfect person for you.
Yes! Perfect … to kill me.
Then die. She is worth dying for.}

I sighed.
{When will I stop this internal war with myself?
When you put aside your ego and start agreeing with me.
Just shut up and go to sleep.}

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A very short chapter ... But next one will be long.

Until then ... Have fun in life!