5sosprefs/cutting

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Michael-

I slammed the door behind me and stormed upstairs. This is it. I can't deal who anything anymore. My job is a living of hell. School stress. Fans hating, loving i don't even know! My boyfriend is on tour and is'nt coming home until next month. Great. He was the one that i would need right now. Then it hit me. Cutting. Noo i promiesed i wont do it but who can stop me? I thought. I looked for my razor and finally i found it. I sat on the floor and put the cold metal over my arm. Should i do it? Yes. I draged the razor over my skin, it hurt but i got used to it after two drags. I cut and cut until i lost it. I dropped the razor to the floor and Broke down in tears. This was a mistake. A big mistake. The worst mistake. What is mikey going to say about this? He is going to think i'm sort of a freak and leave. I thought who bough me to more tears. "Y/N?" Heard a shaky voice say from behind. I froze. "M-Michael?" I said and turned around to meet Michaels shocked eyes. "W-why?" He asked. I could'nt find the right words. "I hate to tell you this but i-I can't Michael. I'm tired. Tired of work. Tired of school. Tired of the hate. Even if there is always a few nice. Tired of world. Tired of life." I said as a tear fell from my eye. He shook hid head and walked over to me and pulled me to his chest. "Then take a break. Quit that work, becouse i see that it's bad and find another one. Take a break from school. Just take a break from all th stressfull things alright? And since i'm back we can spend time togheter and do everything until you feel good and decite to go back to work and school. Alright?" He said. He was right. I've worked harder than i should and i deserv a break. And i'm absolutly quiting that crap job and find another one. Oh hell yeah,i let a small giggle at my last thoughts. We pulled back and Michael was smiling, so was i. "Whats so funny?" He asked. "Oh nothing just thought about something funny." He smiled and kissed me. "I love you *kiss* promies me you wont do it again *kiss* ""i promies" i said and kissed him again.

Ashton-

Me and the boys were having a twitcam and this is the first time i'm in it and i'm pretty nervous. "Alright the twitcam begiens in 3..2.. And it's on!" "Hi guys! So today Y/N decited to join us so say hi Y/N!" Ashton said. "Hi!" I smiled. The boys keept going on until i saw Ashtln freeze for a moment. His eyes were looked at the screen so i looked at it and saw a few comments saying that he is worthless and don't deserv to be in the band or don't even deserv living life. Anger build up in me but i could'nt control it becouse they were mixed with sadness. I took Ashtons hand in mine for the rest of the twitcam until it ended. Ashton got up and walked upstairs. "Whats up with him?"" He saw the netive comments did'nt he?" Michael asked. I nodded and Calum and Luke sat there confused. "What?" They said. "There were a few rude things on the comments and Ashton saw them." I said. They looked down sadly. Calum stood up and walked upstairs. Minute after i heard Calum screaming and banging at one of the Doors upstairs. "ASHTON FOR FUCK SAKE OPEN THE DAMN DOOR OR IM BREAKING IT!" He shouted. Me and the boys stood up in rush and ran upstairs to see Calum behind the bathroom door. Banging and screaming until he Broke the door. "OH GOD ASHTON WHAT THE HECK?" He screamed as his voice got shaky at the end. The boys and i ram in the bathroom to find him with a razor in one hand and cutted arm while blood keept on dreeping from his arm. I felt tears build up in my eyes but before i could walk over to him Michael had alredy done it and was alredy hugging him. He helped him up and helped him sit on the toilet. We helped him clean up and when it was done everyone cleaned up the floor, when it was done we walked down stairs, still shocked about what happened. "Why ash?" Luke asked Breaking the silent. "Everyone hates me. I'm worthless." He said. As he said these words it Broke everyones hearts. "No you arent. Just becouse there are a few people who says that does'nt mean you really are. There is over 2 milion girls and people who loves you and support you. Ignore the shit and think about the positive. Thats all that matters. Promies us you wont do it again. Ever again." I said. He let a tear fall from his eyes and he nodded, leaned in to me and hugged me while he rested his head on my shoulder. "I promies, i love you guys so much that i have no idea where i would be if it was'nt for you guys" he said still hugging me. I rested my hand on his head and ran my fingers trough his hair. "We love you too Ash." Luke said. Everyone smiled and stood up to greet Ashton with a big group hug.

Luke-

"I WISH I NEVER GOT TOGHETER WITH YOU! YOU ARE HORIBLE! IM LEAVING AMD WE ARE OFFICIALLY OVER!" I screamed at my boyfriend and stormed out of the aparment and drove home. I had catch my boyfriend cheeting on me for the 3rd time and i could'nt stand him a minute more so right now all i wanted was my older brother Luke but he was away on tour and so was mom. Dad was always at work so he almost never got time just when i needed someone. I arrived home and stormed in to the house and upstairs to the bathroom. I took out a razor and began to cut. Even if i promiesed to not to i'm doing it anyway like who is going to stop me? Cut one for having a family that don't even have time with me anymore. Cut two for begien worthless. Cut three for begien an idiot and dated a dork. Cut four for begien so ugly, i keept on cutting until i hit a vien. Good job Y/N. I began to feel dizzy so i began to panick and i ran out of the bathroom until i felt someone infront of me. "L-Luke?" Was all i said before everything went black. I woke up in a white room. I was in the hospital. "Y/N?" I heard a voice say. I turned to face the person and it was Luke. Oh no. "L-Luke?" I stuttered. "Don't. You are all okay now and you are going home in a few hours but why would you do it? You could have killed your self!" He said now tears running down his face. "I know and i'm sorry but i could'nt stand begien alive anymore! Do you know how hard it is to have a brother and a mother who is away in months and a father who is'nt around everyday? Do you know how hard it is to go trough hate in school now even worse becouse the face of a hell broke up with me? Do you Luke?" I asked crying. He did'nt say anything instead he stood up from his chair and hugged me. I cried in to his shirt so it was getting a little black from my mascara and eyeliner. "I'm sorry for begien an horrible brother." He said. I shook my head and pulled back to look him in the eyes. "You are the reason i'm alive, the reason i smile. The reason i've been so strong all these years, the reason for my happiness, Luke you are the best brother i could ever ask for. So don't you dare say you are a horible brother. I love you" i said as a few tears fell from his eyes. He kissed my fourhead and smiled. " i love you too princess" he said and sat down on his chair. An hour later the doctor came back and told us that i was free to go. The rest of the night i spent it by cuddling with Luke until i fell asleep while watching movies.

Calum-

"STAY AWAY FROM MY MAN!"" YOU ARE WORTHLESS" "YOU UGLY BITCH!" A few girls screamed at me as i was walking home from work. I felt tears stream down my face so i looked down. I ran home fast and stormed in to the house. What have i done to deserv this? I thought. "Hi sweetie- Whats wrong?" Calum asked as i walked trought the kitchen. "Just leave me alone for a few hours." I snapped not mean to sound rude. "Woah okay," he said hurt. I ran upstairs to the bathroom and locked my self there. I picked up my phone from my jeans pockets and went to Twitter. As i scrolled down the page i found a pichture of me crying while walking and the rude girls was right behind me a few meters away. As i continued to scroll the page i found a few rude tweets about me and a few photoshooped pichtures of me. They were really mean made so i trew my phone across the bathroom and picked out my razor and Began to cut. I keept cutting until i dropped the razor. What did i do? Could'nt i just go to Calum and talk to him. I'm such a freak. I stood up quickly and got the tap on and washed my arm under cold water. I keept on flushing my arm until the blood stopped a bit. I quickly took the bandage pack and wraped a bit of it around my arm and put the pack again, washed my face from the make up until i picked up my phone and walked down stairs. I walked in to the Livingroom to see Calum sitting on the couch, his head resting on his hands. "Hey" i said. He looked up and stood up to meet my eyes. "Hi" he said. "Calum i'm sorry i snapped at you i was just upset i-" "i see you were really sad so you made your arm bleed" he said hurt. I froze and looked at my arm. My sleve was rolled up so the band was showing. Snap. "I-i-" i could'nt find any right words so instead i ran in to calums amrs while he wraped his amrs around me and Held me tight in to him. He pulled me down with him to the couch so i was sitting on his lap still holding me tight while my head was rested on his shoulder and keept on crying. "Shhh baby i'm right here, forget about what happend. I'm not mad at you, i'm just mad that you never came to talk to me" he said. "I-i k-know a-and i-i'm s-sorry" i sobbed. "Don't be" he said. I calmed down a bit after so pulled away and faces him. I cracked a smiled and kissed his lips. "I love you." I said now my head resting on his while Looking at his eyes. He smiled. "I love you too" he said. I leaned back to his shoulder and took his hands and in mine. The rest of the day we cuddled and watched movies and ordered pizza for food.

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