112 / I'm a Pattern Of No Sense To You

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2-20-18
Floor full of tiles, sink full of dish,
Body so empty,
You're all I fucking think.
Eyes wide like doorframes,
Come and go,
Come and go,
I swing like hinges,
Need a bath full
Of fingers,
Red could stick to me,
Seep so deep it sticks around-
You see it yet?

I threw shit at you,
Like vomit from my mouth
After drinking stars.
Life's a downer,
Maybe that's why i couldn't hold onto it.
I'm reaching,
For whatever it is im needing,
Find food and I start eating,
Think about the cash,
Think about the offers,
From carved in cheekbones
They don't know
They don't know,
I think about bottles,
Tip me back like that.
You see it yet?

Caves in my collarbones,
I don't think anyone could love me
Like I do,
And you're not feeling sorry
Like I am.
You're not swimming and sinking,
And trusting and shaking
And sobbing into sheets,
Sheets you've never touched.
I mapped out the world for myself,
And I fought for it,
But you put anchors at my feet,
And I drown drown drown
I need to get high, never come down.
Loved myself so hard,
I didn't need you.
I still don't.
Fuck you.
You had it good,
Not the way the past lovers have had.
You tasted wine
When they had cheap vodka.
For the better,
For the better,
Best was never
It's cold
And I hold onto the weather.
You see it yet?

Im made up of patterns,
Repeating,
Over and over,
But you never saw anything
Till you tripped balls
And maybe I hated that,
And maybe I hated you.
Maybe I still do.
And I've been brought up
To feel more hate than I'll ever
Feel love.
Do you have no remorse?
No empathy?
No consideration?

Alone.
With you.
I'm talking to nobody,
But it's bigger
Than anybody.
And its got me
Its got me
It's got me.

I scream and sob
You drop my self esteem
Like LSD,
You need to go.
The devil talks to me,
Mirrors cracking,
Blood running
Down tracks of blue,
Making tracks of blue,
I live for the pain,
What a tragic case.
He smiles,
Half moon-
But he's got things
Lurking behind his teeth.
It's got me
It's got me
It's got me.

You fucked me up.
You see it yet?
⁃ (m.m)

Self Deception Dove le storie prendono vita. Scoprilo ora