Here and Gone

16

[ ADDISON'S POV ]

"Hi Addison! We weren't expecting you tonight!" Lisa gives me a warm hug.

I look up the stairs to make sure both Ethan and Grayson's doors were shut and they were.

"Hey," I say in a very light voice, "Ive just been really stuck on what to get for Grayson for his birthday in a couple of days." I admit to her.

She pulls away from the hug and puts one hand on the counter, "oh honey you don't need to get them any-"

"I'm getting them something." I lifted my eyebrows as I giggled. "They're my best friends, it's not an option."

She looked down to her shoes while laughing to herself as well, "well, I don't really know what Grayson wants if I'm being honest. Sean and I just ended up getting him some shoes and a couple new shirts."

I thought to myself about what kind of shoes he would like but I didn't want to be basic. He deserves more from me.

"Maybe you could get him just some new football stuff?" She suggested raising her eyebrows.

"He already has a ton of stuff, plus I don't think I'd pick out the right colors or anything." I played with my fingers.

"If I'm being honest with you, Grayson's been really hard to read lately. He hasn't really been interested in football, drawing or even music like he used to be." She looked down at the table as her entire mood changes.

"I think the crash as really impacted those parts of his brain. You know, his creative side. Ever since the accident he hasn't drawn a single picture or even touched a football."

No, she was so wrong. It's all my fault. Deep down I feel that she knows that, she just doesn't want to hurt me and say it to my face.

"Addison since we all love you and you're a big part in our lives I'm gonna tell you something." She reconnects eye-contact with me.

I nod waiting for her to start talking.

"Grayson has been seeing a therapist for the past couple of weeks."

Everything dropped inside of me. My mouth, my eyes, my stomach, my heart.

"Not remembering things is becoming a big issue with him. All his friends talking about things that he can't remember, looking at all of his old drawings and not remembering how to draw. Looking at you... it's hurting him." She admit making my complete heart shatter.

"The therapist told him to write down his feelings. For a while that worked. But when Sean and I asked to read the journal, he went insane. He ripped the book in half and started ripping out pages. He broke. Whatever was written in that book he didn't want anyone knowing which is why we are all just so confused." She shifted putting her elbows on the table while holding her forehead.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I had no idea. This whole time that Ethan and I have been getting closer and closer, Grayson has been getting therapy and has been broken about not remembering things.

"Lisa." I put my hand onto her shoulder, "He will be okay. I know Grayson and he's strong." I felt as if I were about to cry.

"Will you just try to be there for him? In any way. Just watch over him please Addison? You've always been so good at it." A tear slipped from her eye.

I knew watching over him wasn't only going to hurt him, but hurt me. But I'd do anything for Lisa and Sean.

"Of course I will."

_____

Looking for a birthday present for your ex boyfriend is not as easy as it sounds. Aisle through aisle I just couldn't pick anything. None of it seemed to fit right.