The room felt too silent even after the song was playing in a high volume, she realized it wasn't the room but her mind. She was shocked, not just with his sudden arrival but also with the emotions he expressed. She didn't forget her disappointment but she was happy at the same time, happy because her ignorance had affected in the same manner she had wanted it to, disappointed because he had again thought that she would leave him. True there were instances in her life where she had felt like walking away but she wasn't a person who ran away from problems she was a person who stood strong and faced everything which came her way... relationships were hard to build, why build one just to give up on it? She was certainly not so weak to walk away from the person she loved and also who loved her, he might not have voiced it but everything he did and said now clearly screamed that he loves her and she knew that there will be no other opportunity like this to make him understand her place in all this.
Virat raised his face and let the soft rays of dusk touch his face, the sky was in layers of colors making it breathtakingly beautiful, he knew that darkness would wash the sky and the beautiful colors evading the sky would be lost. Beautiful but short lived' he wondered if life was the same too... if the happiness which was in his life was for a short period too... he wished that it would come back and stay there with him forever. He realized how happy he was to have Manvi in his life, he realized how the emotional bond they shared mattered to him more than everything else. Now they were physically close, they lived under the same roof but it felt as if they lived in different planets. He had told her how she belonged to him and how she didn't have the right to hurt him the way she was doing but he also knew that he belonged to her now and she had all the right on him.
Virat sighed softly as he observed the sky which was now gradually changing its color, he had to go down and talk to Pratap and Padmini, he remembered he didn't even see Padmini around when he entered the house, he couldn't just think of anything else other than seeing Manvi and venting his anger on her. But now he was able to think straight and he also knew that he had to take Manvi back home so he turned to leave the terrace but stopped; seeing Manvi come into the terrace, he noticed she was looking at him as she walked forward.
Manvi who had so many things in her mind didn't care about where they were standing, she had looked around the whole house searching for him, and even felt furious thinking that he had left without having dinner as per her parents wish, but had tried her luck by checking the terrace. She was breathing heavily when she neared him and took few seconds to compose herself as he kept staring mesmerizingly at her beauty under the dusky sky.
"Aap," she started, breaking away his fantasy, "aap ghar jao, mein aap khi saath nahi aungi," she completed trying to instigate him,
Virat who was still recovering from the trance took a moment to understand what she was saying, "What?" He yelled, moving forward. "What did you say?" not because he didn't hear her but because he wanted her reply to be different this time.
Manvi stayed still as he neared her, but couldn't stop from looking away, she wanted him to react, and he did.
"Manvi this is no joke..." He tried to explain the situation by covering his own dilemma.
"Mujhe aap ke saath nahi aana,"
"Kyun nahi aana? Kehthi thi na... That you love me, you wouldn't leave me..." everything about him told her that he was feeling helpless, hurt and angry.
"I don't want to come because you don't understand me Virat ji, because you never kept up to your promises," Manvi turned and was about to move away when he held her hand and tugged her forward.
"What are you talking about? Manvi look at me... please tell me what I did wrong that you are so angry with me that you don't want to look at me, talk to me... kya kia maine?" there was a tinge of plead in his tone,
Manvi shook her head, then blinked back her tears, she knew that he was indifferent to many things around him but she never realized he was so ignorant that he didn't even realize why she was upset with him, this thought... this realization made her fatigue and she dropped her shoulders defeated, she didn't know how she was going to make him understand, she didn't know for how long she was supposed to be patient. Does falling in love with someone who is so different to you cost so much?' she wondered as Virat kept looking at her expectedly.
"You promised that whatever happens, whatever changes between us or around us that you would share everything with me... and that you wouldn't keep me away. Par aap wahi kiya na?" she removed his grip on her arm, and stepped away from him. "You made the beautiful days of my life a suffering, You know jab humari shaadi ho rahi thi..." She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment and shook her head, thinking about the turmoil she was going through made her tremble all over. "when you treated me like a stranger in our own wedding, how was it like for me? Did you ever think about how I must have felt...? I didn't know why you were keeping away from me, mein maan thi hun that you were upset. I know that you were going through something bitter but how could you not come to me and push me away after you agreed that you were in love with me?" she looked at him straight in the eyes when she uttered the last few words.
"Did you know what I was wondering those days... aap jaan thei bhi hai kaise buri kayal arahi thi meri man mein..." she shook her head again cringing at the thoughts which were evading her mind.
"I thought that you didn't love me... then I thought that you weren't happy with our wedding, phir mujhe laga that you will hate me for keeping that diary away from you. Aap ko patha hai kitna dard ho rahi thi mujhe?" She hugged herself, as if wanting to keep that pain away from her.
Only she knew how hard it was for her to fight all this, if she was married to him today and was his wife it was only because the love she held for both the families, that was the only thing which gave her enough courage to fight through and face everything, because even if she loved him; uncertainty had evaded her love for him at that time, her broken dreams had created a gap between her heart and her love that she couldn't even reach out to it for support.
"Maaf kar dun mein is sab khe liye aap ko?" she questioned him as he stared at her with a guilt stricken face. "How can some gifts or flowers in the room make up for the pain I went through?"
They were silent for few minutes as both of them tried to control their state. Virat realized how much he had hurt her by keeping her away from him. He knew he could have at least asked some time to settle, told her that he needed some time to digest whatever he read in that diary. But he was selfish as always, he had forgotten about the girl who had forgiven him and accepted him for what he is. Virat cursed the moment in which he saw that diary, he cursed everything about his past which made his future, his Manvi suffer so much and he cursed himself for being so self centered. The first thought which came to his mind was letting her go... it hurt him but that was what his heart always did because it was easier, and it felt if he would let go it will only be him who would suffer but not her or anyone else. But now he knew better, she might be asking him to leave her but there was also a time in which she had made him promise that he wouldn't leave her no matter what... Isn't this the situation in which that no matter what' applied? It was and he would give her what she wants but never leave her on her own to suffer. He made a promise to himself at this moment that was to never push her away from him.
"Manvi..." He whispered, but she continued to stare ahead of her, it was getting dark and he could barely see her face. He moved forward and held her arm softly; he felt her shiver and remembered how long it has been since he touched her affectionately. Actually he realized that it was so rare that he touched her softly or even lovingly. He was extremely unfair with her, he had wronged her and he wanted to mend it before it was too late.
All Manvi wanted to do after he held her hand was to hug him and get lost in his embrace, but she couldn't, there was something amiss, and there was something else she expects even though she couldn't actually pinpoint what it was.
Virat wanted to look at her face so he moved in front of her and aligned her face upwards by holding her chin, her face was wet with tears and his heart broke to see her so hurt because of him, he couldn't see her hurt or in pain yet he was the one who had hurt her the most. He wanted to make up for everything he did, but he didn't know what would make up to all the harsh and heartless things he had done, he didn't even think that anything in this world would actually heal her pain.
At this moment both of them didn't realize how they would come out of this web of dilemma they were in but at the same time they were equally desperate to get out of this pain and get sunk in the sea of love.
