Shelter • wolfstar au

33 ; undeniable good looks

Sirius shook his head. "I was never good at Potions. Could you make me some tea?"

"What were you good at?" Remus asked before countering his question with, "And no. Why can't you make tea using magic?"

"Please!" Sirius whined, elongating the vowels to emphasise his desire. "I'm a terrible cook."

With a sigh, Remus brought out a kettle from the top shelf and poured water on it, before placing it down on the stove to boil. "What were you good at?" he asked again, watching as Sirius hummed a tune to himself.

"Transfiguration," he answered, biting on the side of his thumb. "It's where you can transfigure something to another thing. And Charms."

"Charms for your undeniable good looks?" Remus asked with a lopsided smile, sarcasm evident on his voice, but only slightly. Sirius laughed.

"Well, that too." Remus rolled his eyes, pouring tea leaves into the kettle. "But the Charms I'm talking about teaches you spells and jinxes."

As the tea in the kettle boiled, Remus moved and joined Sirius at the counter, sitting down beside him. He brushed his hands together to get rid of spilt potion, and Sirius turned his head to look at him. "So that's what you and Nathan have been doing when you were cooped up together in the kitchen? Making potions?"

"More like Nathan helping me as well as scolding me for wasting your ingredients."

"But you completed this potion on your own," Sirius pointed out, gesturing toward the cauldron which was spurting out mushrooms of blue smoke. A sweet smell that reminded Remus of wet earth and jasmines he used to collect with his mother as a child was emanating from inside the container. He inhaled and let out a low sigh of satisfaction.

"That I did," he stated, rather proudly. Sirius smiled and punched him lightly on the arm.

The kettle began to whistle. Remus got down to get the tea poured into teacups, when Sirius spoke. "By the way," he said slowly, and Remus frowned as he realised that he was trying not to laugh, "I like your new hairstyle."

"I didn't do anything to my hair," he said in confusion, raising his hand up to his head to touch his hair, which seemed frizzy. He ran his fingers through the brown strands, realising soon that it was stuck up straight as though a current has been passed through it, and, eyes widening, he quickly began to flatten it. Sirius burst out laughing.

"That was one of the reasons I hated potions," he stated, bringing a hand out to run it through Remus's hair. "The fumes ruined my hair, and sometimes it took hours to fix it."

Suddenly a frown appeared on Remus's face and he focused himself on pouring out the tea to two small teacups, one of which he handed to Sirius, who looked curiously at his sudden change of mood. Remus had, abruptly, had a vision of a young Sirius in his head after what he had just said - as beautiful as he was now, except with less wrinkles and fuller cheeks, and maybe with eyes holding a brighter glow, standing in front of a mirror and attempting to tame his unkempt hair which was turned into a mess by his Potions class, his face as innocent as though he has never seen a war, never witnessed his friends and his godson dying, never knowing what it meant to sacrifice oneself, free of any prejudice and violence, just a small, sixteen year old boy with a bright future, with dreams and desires, with hope, love, and affection - not someone who was thrown into a war and forced to be a young soldier, forced to give up his innocence, and live a life he never wanted. Remus wasn't sure what got him to imagine such things, but he couldn't help it, and he couldn't help but feel the pain that he was sure Sirius had to endure everyday.

"Everything alright?" Sirius waved his hand in front of his face, causing him to snap out of his imagination, and he blinked several times to shake the picture out of his mind. He looked up at Sirius, whose eyes were furrowed with confusion, the teacup held lightly in his right hand, and his left hand hovering in front of Remus, grey eyes looking dull, the same eyes he had looked at months ago in Santa Paws' face and wondered how human it looked. He swallowed, and managed to speak.

"Everything's fine."

❇

Remus was putting on a flannel shirt over his pajamas, and climbing into bed, when the door opened just a crack and Sirius peeked in. "Do you mind?" he asked quietly, and with a smile, Remus shook his head and gestured for him to come in.

The wizard got into the bed beside him, crawling in underneath the warm blankets, and letting out a loud sigh of relief as though he has never had such comfort in his life. His eyes fluttered shut, but by his position and low breathing, Remus could tell that he was far from falling asleep. He shifted and turned to lie on his side and faced Sirius.

His dark hair which now fell past his shoulders, and which always crowned his face in a manner that spoke aristocracy, now lay limply over him, covering part of his face and neck, and making him look just like a child who had collapsed into bed after hours of play. By the warm glow of the moonlight that Remus had allowed to enter through the crack in the curtain, he could see Sirius's sunken cheeks, a shadow underneath his cheekbones which, once, was probably splashed with a faint pink, and he could see the hollow marks circling his eyes, which, he was sure, had taken over the initial pale colour of his beautiful face, and he could see his chapped lips, darkened and cracked, no longer plump or pink or soft, as it probably has been once.

Raising his hand, he pushed Sirius's hair out of his face, causing him to open his eyes and send him an amused, sleepy smile. "Enjoying the view?" he asked quietly, eyes barely open, and Remus was thankful to the dark for keeping the faint blush on his cheeks concealed from Sirius's vision. But he probably wouldn't have noticed it anyway, for his eyes kept closing of their own accord, and after a few seconds of trying, Sirius looked at him once again. "You've cuddled Santa Paws before. How well can you cuddle a human?"

Face burning, Remus put his arm over Sirius and pulled him closer. His eyes closed again as he snuggled into Remus's chest, and he slowly, affectionately, ran his hand over his back, his arm and through his hair. His breathing turned slow and heavy, and soon enough, he was fast asleep.

Remus was woken, as he realised, in the middle of the night, by the cold and by the sound of Sirius's voice. He turned around and found the wizard clutching at the blankts between his fingers like a vice, leaving none for Remus, and muttering in his sleep, eyes furrowed and face drawn into a heavy frown. Sleepily, Remus leaned over and began to shake him to wake him up, before he stopped, as Sirius's words reached his ears.

"Please," he seemed like he was begging, pleading, "please ... I didn't kill him ... he's my brother ... I wouldn't ... it wasn't me ... please ... believe me ..."

Remus no longer felt sleepy at all, and it was with a furious shove that he woke Sirius up, and he snapped his eyes open with a start, staring at Remus as though he was a phantom, eyes wide, sweat glistening on his forehead, knuckles white from where they had the blankets clutched tightly. His breathing came out rapidly and noisily; and gradually, his fingers loosened their hold on the blanket, his breathing slowed, his body relaxed, before he sank into the bed, staring up at the ceiling with a hollow expression.

Remus poured out some water into a glass by his bed and made Sirius drink it. He did so obediently, before curling up into a ball and hiding his face between his arms, as though this would help him fight the nightmares. Unsure of what he could, or what he was supposed to do, Remus finally put his arms around Sirius and held him like that, lying awake until he fell asleep, and lying awake long after that, to make sure he didn't face anymore nightmares.

❇

enjoy the cuteness while it lasts.

:)