Painful - A Jacksepticeye x Depressed Reader FanFiction

Twenty-three

After we kissed we made sure to walk home as fast as possible cause it started raining. "Do you want to watch some TV?", Jack asked. "Sure." It was wonderful and embarrassing at the same time. I was so much in love with him but I was scared in the same time. So we turned on the TV and sat down on the couch. "So... what are we going to do now?", I asked. "About us? Well,...we could try to...be girlfriend and boyfriend." I had to swallow. My stomach was hurting from all the feelings inside me. He wanted to be my boyfriend? After all the things I messed up? After I tried to kill me? After I nearly died and he went through hell? "(y/n)? Is everything alright? You look so pale", he asked. "Yeah, I think so." He stood up and got me a glass of water. "Thanks", I said and drank the whole glass in one sip. "You seem very thirsty", he said. Jack sat down again and took my hand. My hole body froze for a moment. "Sorry", Sean ment. "No, it's not your fault. I...I'm just nervous. It's my first time being in such a situation." "I can understand but you don't have to be scared." "I know, but I am." He stroke my cheek. "You are so beautiful." "You are beautiful too." "You mind if I kiss you again?", he asked shyly. "Absolutely not", I said and we kissed again. I never kissed a guy before and I was glad that Sean was my first. I was so in love with him. When we kissed, everything felt magical. My life was okay for a moment. Nothing mattered in that moment, just him. He let go from my lips and hugged me. "You are wonderful." "I'm not. I'm a mess", I said. "That's okay. I'll guide you out of your situation." He still hugged me and I lay my head on his shoulder.

After we watched TV for about two hours I wanted to sleep. "I'm tired", I said and yawned. "Oh, no problem. You can sleep in my bed. I'll take the couch", Jack said. He offered me his bed? "Are you sure? I'm completely fine with sleeping on the couch." He nodded. I went into his bedroom and put on my Pyjamas. I lay down and thought about everything. The situation between us was difficult. We both love each other, but I am too shy. I can't really talk about my feeling with someone else. What should I say? "I love you", "Hey, you wanna be my boyfriend. I mean we kissed and so..." What would he say? Does he even want to be my boyfriend? 

Sometimes around 2 am I fell asleep. I was very tired, cause I slept on my phone. "Please, don't be broken", I thought and turned it on. I had three missed calls from my mom. I decided to wait for afternoon to call her back. I stood up and went into the kitchen. Sean was still sleeping on the couch. I started making breakfast. After some minutes of cooking he woke up.  "Morning", I said. "Morning", he said irritated. He was not a morning-person. "Did you sleep well?", he asked while making some coffee. "Yeah, your bed is really comfortable. Should think about a new matress. Mine is really old and hard as stone." I wanted to talk about something before going to the tough questions.