Painful - A Jacksepticeye x Depressed Reader FanFiction

Chapter 19 - the trial

(y/n)'s pov.

I knew we still had to talk about what had happened. I knew we still had to talk about how we would move on from it – or if I would start therapy. But I was going to avoid the topic for now... I wanted to enjoy what we had for now. I feared talking about my addiction and the stress and pain I caused him while he was as the Con would make him upset and I did not want to fight on our first day as a couple.

~ Time Skip to the day of the trial ~

I looked in the mirror. Black skirt, white blouse, hair tied back into a bun. My face was full of worries. "Try to hide your emotions", I told myself and tried to cover up my nerves with a slight smile. My phone rang. It was my lawyer. "Hello Mr. Manson", I greeted him. "Miss (y/l/n), I hope you're ready for the big day." "I am." I looked in the mirror again. "Fake it til you make it", I told myself. "Great. I'll see you in half an hour." Sean came out of his bedroom. "Is he ready?" "I think he's looking forward to it much more than I do..." "Maybe because he knows it will be a piece of cake. No one will deny (y/b/n) made your life a living hell and no one will question that he purposely endangered your life by pushing you into oncoming traffic." "Yeah, you're right...I don't know why I'm still so nervous." "Because you have to face him and the others..." "That's probably it..." He took my hands. "You'll be fine. I know you're strong enough." I looked at him. "Thank you...You always know what to say to make me feel better." I grabbed my purse, and we left the apartment.

I was glad nobody knew about the trial. Otherwise, there would certainly be fans around the court-building to catch a glimpse of Sean and I entering the building hand in hand. We did not make the relationship public yet. We recorded some videos together for both of our channel, but we agreed to keep the relationship a secret for now. Primarily because we were only dating for 2 months, and we did not want to announce something like this light heartily. Cause if we would figure that it does not work out between us, we would need to address it publicly and influencer-breakups are always messy...

Sean pov.

~ half a day later ~

The moment we leave the building I take a deep breath. I was glad it was over. My head was still spinning from all the details I learned today.

(y/n) talked about her past, present and future. How she moved countries, desperately trying to fit in and making sure she was always tiptoeing around anything and everyone. How she found joy in content-creation and streaming for people, how her classmates – especially (y/b/n) – tormented her for it. She never understood why what she did as a hobby mattered so much to them and why they did not just leave her alone. (y/b/n) was asked the same question. He did not give an answer. In fact, he did not look at (y/n) once while she was talking. I saw him looking at her while she was walking to the front and taking a seat. He seemed to feel remorse for what he had done. At least that's what I could tell from his face. And rightly so. I would wish that he would never be able to sleep peacefully again. I would wish him to be haunted by her in his dreams.

"Do you want to go get food somewhere?" I asked her. She pulled herself out of her thoughts. "Sure." She took out her phone. "Oh my God," she said excitedly. "What?" "The answer. They finally sent it." "Really?" "Yes." "But doesn't something like that usually come in the mail?" She nodded. "Yeah, but...Didn't I tell you it was sent to my old address?" "No, you have not." "I called because I have not received an answer yet and they told me that they had already sent the letter. We realized that they had accidentally sent the letter to my old address. They then asked me, if my parents could forward the letter to me. But they're away on vacation the entire month. That's why I've now received it by email." "Quite a mess." "You can say that twice..."

"So, what does the email say?" "I haven't checked yet." "How come?" "What if it's a rejection?" I sighed. "You know what? We're going to go get something to eat, and you can open the email there." "Okay. You're right. I can't postpone it forever."

"So..." She sighed and took out her phone. "Here goes nothing..." She stared at her phone in disbelieve. "Did you make it?" She nodded, her eyes still glued to the screen. (y/n) made it into the college she wanted to get into. I was so proud of her and so happy for her.

---

Her life had really changed dramatically. She had me, she would start college, her tormentors were convicted, and, in a few weeks, she would have her school diploma and would never ever need to enter that building. I was sure that she was feeling better now. I was sure that her addiction would soon no longer be an issue...

But I was wrong...Because I'm an idiot...Because I convinced myself, that I changed everything. Because I convinced myself, that I fixed her...