Painful - A Jacksepticeye x Depressed Reader FanFiction

Chapter 8 - Never going back to normal

Sean pov.

The 15 minutes passed by fast and as the nurse came in, I let go of her hand and went outside. "Can you call me, if something changes?", I asked her. "Sure." Another nurse handed me a piece of paper and I quickly wrote down my number. "Thank you very much." Then I left the hospital. There was nothing I could do. I drove home and took a shower. My phone was next to it so I could hear it if the hospital called. But nothing happened. I sat down on my computer, but I was not in the mood to play something. "Everything alright?", Robin texted me on discord. I thought it might be good to tell him the story. I didn't know who else I should talk to about it at the moment. So I briefly summarised what had happened the last couple of days and especially what went down hours ago. He called me and we talked for a long time.

~ 3 days later ~

The hospital did call me every day but only to tell me that sadly, nothing has really changed. (y/n) was still unconscious and not responsive. Luckily her other organs were fine and no other internal bleeding accrued. So, they were hopeful she would wake up soon. I decided to go to the hospital again. On my way I stopped by a flower-shop and bought some flowers for (y/n).

I sat down on the chair across her room again and waved at the head-nurse. She came to me. "Hello Mr. McLoughlin. I have some wonderful news." I looked at he in disbelieve. "She woke up?" She nodded. "Yes, I just called her parents. I would have called you right after that but since you're already here..." "Can I see her?", I asked immediately afterwards. "I'll ask her." The nurse went in (y/n)'s room and a minute later she came outside and waved me in. "You can stay here until her parents arrive." "Thank you."

I sat down on the chair next to her bed. (y/n) was still hooked up to the machines but her eyes were open and she had no breathing tube in anymore. "Hey", she said with a quiet voice. "Hey." I showed her the flowers. "I got these for you. I'll put them in the vase next to the ones from you parents." "My parents?", she asked a bit confused. "Yeah. They immediately rushed to the airport and took the next possible flight after they found out what had happened to you." "You spoke with them?" "I had a brief chat with your mum on the day of your accident." She put one hand on her head. "Is everything okay?", I asked. She nodded. "Yeah...I...It's all a bit...much..." "I guess that's normal considering the situation." I sat down on the chair again. "I only learned about what had happened a few minutes ago so...yeah." "You probably can't remember the entire day..." She looked at me. "The last thing I remember was getting ready for the cinema...and after that...blank."

I looked at her. "She can't remember me asking her on a date and me telling her that I liked her", I thought. I figured it would be for the best to not overwhelm her with that information for now. "I'll tell her when she's out of the hospital", I thought. "Yeah...We drove to the cinema on Sunday and had a great time", I said. "What movie did we watch?" "Avengers: Age of Ultron." "Really?" I nodded. "We can watch it a second time if you want." She smiled. "That would be nice." "Don't worry. I won't spoil anything." "If you do, I'm going to kill you." We both laughed. I was so happy that I could talk to her again. We looked at each other for a minute. Nobody said anything. "Sean?", she suddenly said. "Yeah?" "Thank you...For everything." I said nothing. "One of the doctors told me...that without the CPR you and the driver performed I would be...dead." In my head I saw the scenes in front of the school again. Me screaming, her getting hit by the car, us performing CPR while we waited for the ambulance to arrive. She saw that something was wrong. "I'm sorry....Sean...I did not mean to..." "Don't worry about it." She cried a bit. "Hey. Don't cry. Everything is fine...", I said trying to calm her down. "I should not have said that." "It's fine." I held her hand. "We've both been through a lot these last few days...but we'll get through this. I'll always be there for you." "And I'll always be there for you." She smiled at me and I smiled back.

Suddenly we heard a knock on the door. I turned around and saw her mother entering the room. I let go of (y/n)'s hand. Her dad entered the room too. "Hello Sean. It's good to see you", she greeted me. I shook her hand. "Hello Mrs. (y/l/n)." I turned around to (y/n) and said goodbye. "I'll call you in the evening, if that's okay with you...", she said and smiled. "That's okay with me." Then I left the room. I thanked the nurse again for letting me in the room and drove home.

I thought a lot about what had happened – and how things would be from now on. I called Robin. "Hey buddy, you got time?" "What's up?" "(y/n) woke up from the coma. And she seems fine." "That's great news." "It is. But...she does not remember anything that happened on Sunday. The last thing she remembers is getting ready for the cinema." "So, she does not remember you told her you liked her?" "Nope." "And I guess you did not tell her yet." "I did not want to overwhelm her. She just woke up from a coma – from an accident she does not even remember having." "I understand that. But you should definitely tell her in the next few days. Otherwise, she might think you deliberately kept it secret from her." "You mean, she'll think I did not tell her because I did not mean it?" "Or because you changed your mind..." "You're right. I'll tell her once she gets out of the hospital."

Robin was right. If I don't tell her, she would probably be suspicious about why I did not tell her, if she remembers the conversation on her own. Back home I started my PC and recorded some more footage. I wanted to get as much work done as possible so I could focus on (y/n) the next few days.

In the evening she called me. "Hey, I hope I'm not bothering you", she said shyly. "Not at all. I'm cooking some dinner for myself, so I'm happy to have some company." "What are you cooking?" "Pizza." "Self-made? Or are you just throwing one in the oven?" "Well...I added some extra cheese on top so..." She laughed. "How's the hospital food?" "Don't even remember me..." I laughed. "I'll bring some snacks tomorrow." "You'll visit me again?" "Sure, I will." Silence. "That's nice. I'll look forward to that." I heard some nurses in the background, so I waited a few minutes. "Sorry. Two nurses came in and told me that I would be transferred to the normal ward tomorrow morning." "That's great news." "Yeah, it is. The beeping of the machines makes me crazy." "Are your parents still with you?" "Nope. They left an hour ago. I still can't believe they headed to Ireland as soon as they heard." "Why, they are your parents?" "I know. I was just surprised. But I'm glad they are here...And I was glad you were too." "No problem. Do you want to watch a series tomorrow?" "Which one?" "You can pick. I have Netflix on my laptop." "Can we watch Stranger Things? I wanted to start that show for ages but never got the time to watch through it." "Sure. I watched season 1 and it was amazing. Season 2 aired a few weeks ago." "No spoilers!" "Sure." "Sean, I'm tired." "Then go to sleep. We can talk tomorrow." "I'll text you the room number as soon as I get transferred." "Thanks." "Good night." "Good night."

(y/n) pov.

I placed my phone on the bedside table. I thought about everything that had happened. My head started to hurt. I still could not remember anything that had happened on Sunday or Monday. "Shit...What if he said something important and I can't remember?", I worried, trying my best to focus on remembering. My head hurt. The nurse came in to check on me. "Headache?" I nodded. "You should not force your memories to come back. They will...trust me. They always do." She handed me some pain meds. "Now try to sleep. Tomorrow is a new day. Maybe you'll wake up and suddenly remember." She smiled at me. I smiled back. "Thanks."

So I tried my best to fall asleep but since I only woke up today from a 3 day long coma I did not feel like sleeping. I felt like walking around. But I knew that I would not have the strength to do that yet. So I laid in bed – thinking about everything I could remember happening. And I thought about Sean. I looked at my left arm. "He probably saw it", I thought. I decided that it would be for the best to tell him the truth right away. "I can't keep it from him anymore. And if I don't tell him, he will be mad about it. I need to be honest..." I grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and started writing down some notes about what I wanted to say to him.