Us, to nowhere

•46•

I told mother. I told her about how I didn't want to stay in Manhattan anymore, about how I needed this, needed to go away. I told her I would be living with dad for awhile and then directly from there going to Canada. She could come see me off to the airport when I leave for college.
The hardest part came when I had to tell Delilah.
I went to her house with macroons because oh boy isn't she going to get pissed.
I met her grandmom first, she loves me. Can't blame her.
"Hola, abuela."

"Oh, hola, mija." We hugged.

"How are you?"

"I'm fine, you?"

"Me, too."

"Where is D?"

"Cleaning her room."

"Hi. I got to red velvet macroons." I said when I entered her room.

"Oh my god. What do you want?"

"I love you so that's why I bought you some." I rolled my eye.

"Aww. I love you too."
We sat on her bed between the pile of clothes and talked.

"So there's something you should know."

"Okay."

"So you know how in a month we're all leaving."

"Yeah. It's going to be so sad. I'm like so going to miss you and so going to send you snaps of me everyday so your snarky ass doesn't forget me."

"I'll never forget you, D."

"You better not."

"So listen, I'm telling you in short. Last week I got very drunk and passed out in a bar. And the bartender was friends with Alex so she called him and he took me home, his home. It was very awkward and the more time I spend with him I realise I need him. But I still can't forgive him for sleeping with Paige."

"Faith..."

"Listen to me. After graduation when you, Nathan and I chilled and had fun, I felt good. And I want that good and it can't happen here. In Manhattan. Everything reminds me of him, the roads, the cafes hell even the docks remind me of him."

"The docks? What the hell happened there?"

"Babe, we celebrated our two year anniversary there."

"Oh, yeah yeah. I forgot. The candle lit dinner, right?"

"Yes. It was the most beautiful night of my life and he was the most beautiful phase."

"Faith..."

"So I just can't stay here. I'm moving in with my dad." I cut her off.

"Wait. What?"

"I'm moving..."

"Yeah yeah I heard you."

"D, I know you're pissed."

"Beyond pissed. You think moving to what place?"

"California. With my father."

Yeah, so you think moving to California is going to solve everything?" She shouted.

"It won't. But I want to give it a shot. I want to see how I can handle a life without him."

"Faye. What makes you think living with your dad is better?"

"It's not. But there's nothing out there that reminds me of him. Nothing. I get to start over. And I want to forgive my father, too. Mom says he misses me."

"You sure you want to do this?"

"Yes. I've given it a lot of thought. I want to do this."

"You can just as easily forgive Alex. And go back to being your old mushy self."