Part 11: Am I Gay?

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~I don't care what they say, I'm in love with you.~

"Bleeding Love" by Leona Lewis is blasting through Dinah's speaker in her bedroom on a Saturday night. Dinah is wearing a black loose tank top, a black lace underwear, and nothing else. Her long, caramel toned arms and legs are spread out all over her bed. She just stare at her ceiling and think. There are so many things going on inside her brilliant mind right now and all she want to do is just take a break but she can't stop thinking about Lauren.

After the kiss, Dinah asked herself again and again why did she kiss Lauren. She knows she was the one who started it, but why did she do it. She doesn't know. The only thing that she remembered before the kiss was that Lauren was talking about something. She remembered that Lauren needed to shut up, so she shut it for her. That's all she can remembered.

Did I kiss her, just because I wanted her to stop talking?

Dinah keeps thinking about this and the answer is always 'No'. No, she didn't kiss Lauren just to shut her up. She kissed Lauren because she wanted to and because she knew that she can.

After realizing that Lauren has a crush on her, Dinah paid a little more attention in everything that Lauren does. She watched the way Lauren moves her body, swaying her hips left and right as she walks. She listened to the way Lauren laughs when Normani tells stupid jokes. She watched the way Lauren smiles at her friends as they walk pass each other in the school's hallways. And most importantly, she saw the way Lauren looks at her.

Thinking about Lauren makes her feels butterflies. Every feelings is so new to her. No one had ever make she feels like this before. Maybe except for Zendaya, but nothing Zendaya did could ever compare to this. She never wanted to look at someone like this. She never wanted to talk to someone as much as this. She never wanted for someone to has a crush on her as much as she wants Lauren to.

Dinah is scared. She's scared that the only reason she's interested in Lauren is because she knew that Lauren is interested in her. No other girls have had a crush on her before. Lauren excites her, like she is taking Dinah to a part of the world that she has never been before. It is exciting and terrifying at the same time and Dinah is loving it.

Lauren is a stunning vision, Dinah admitted. Her skins look soft to the touch like they are going to melt Dinah's hands if she touch them. Her strong intoxicated vanilla scent is very dangerous because it makes Dinah just wants to close her eyes and ears, shutting down all her other senses so that her sense of smells can function perfectly. Her inviting lips that Dinah feels the need to feel them against hers again. Everything about Lauren is drawing Dinah in.

"Fuck." Dinah breath out, now fully realized that she has developed feelings for Lauren.

"What are you doing to me, Lolo." Hand reaching up to trace the line of her lips, she smile. The feeling of Lauren's lips still lingered on hers.

Her phone buzzed from some incoming messages brought her out of her train of thought. She's sitting up and lean against the headboard after grabbing her phone.

Greg:
You didn't show up to my practice yesterday.

"Ah shit." Dinah curses a lot when she has too many things going on inside her head. She totally forgot about Greg and his practice because she was with Lauren. Was kissing Lauren to be exact. Another wave of guilt rushing through her body as she read his text. She told him that she would be there, but she didn't. He is once again, hurt by her.

Dinah Jane Hansen:
I'm sorry. I came home early because I need to feed Kim and Hulk.
I forgot to tell you.

She didn't lie. She did came home early because her puppies need to be fed. But her original plan was to come home, feed the dogs, and go back to school to his practice. Safe to say that that plan was a total failure.

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