You Don't Own Me

ACT 14

ACT 14

Katarina nearly choked on her own breath as soon as the question reached her sense of hearing. It was soon followed with her own deafening heartbeat, the organ in her ribcage becoming frantic. Ashe just had to ask that question. The answer in her mind can never be morphed into a lie, which is what made her chest ache.

This is it.

She's going to lose Ashe in the very moment that's about to follow.

Without any of her control, her tears began to flow continuously as she started taking in shaky breaths and restrained sobs.

She shook her head. "No, I don't."

Once her response left her, she suddenly broke down. She honestly doesn't know. Doesn't know why she started to cry out loud, not caring if she looked like the most pathetic being in the world, feeling like she's in her lowest point, painfully suffering from within.

Everything is all too confusing for her.

In her whole life, she never imagined herself to look so vulnerable in front of someone, let alone someone who she labeled as her fuck buddy.

But no, Ashe is truly more than the tag she assigned to her. She isn't a mere object Katarina can freely use just to satisfy her carnal desire.

Staring straight to Ashe, tears showed not a single sign in stopping, the pain in her chest searing, she truly does not know what to do anymore.

"I'm... I'm not supposed to be the one... that's crying... But... Goddammit, Ashe! I don't want to lose you! I...! I don't know why I feel like this, why I'm reacting like this, but fuck..."

She covered her eyes with one hand as continued to cry in her palm, teeth clenching and unclenching.

"I don't how to do these kinds of things. And I... I just... I just want you to teach me... Because I never felt like this in my entire life until I met you."

Katarina couldn't bring herself to lower her hand, fearing that she will see the possible look of pity Ashe may be giving her in that instant. She can feel Ashe's gaze focused on her, but still she refused to look up and meet it.

When more than a couple of seconds passed without receiving any verbal responses from the Winters in front of her, Katarina can feel the hope she's holding on slipping out of her grasp. The prospect of her and Ashe still being together in the future is already a blur, and it's becoming bleaker and bleaker.

Identical to a touch of a being that was sent down from Heaven itself, Katarina felt a soft hand gently cup her cheek. She stilled for a brief moment before lifting her head from its bowed position, hand parting from her eyes and emeralds into ceruleans.

"You are completely unfair." Ashe told her, her own eyes shimmering with tears she is currently holding back.

Katarina wordlessly gazed at her, lips slightly parted.

"Like what you just said, it should be me who's crying." Ashe momentarily pursed her lips before continuing, "But you should know that you have the right cry as well."

Again, Katarina could only stare, unable to conjure up any words she can say in that moment.

"My tears can wait. It's rather obvious..." Ashe smiled in a way that brought comfort within Katarina. "...that yours cannot."

Katarina, vocabulary still empty of words, tried to turn away, mostly due to the shame she felt. Shame that she brought upon herself once Ashe made an effort in consoling her. It's supposed to be the other way around, something she told herself in her thoughts.