LET ME IN [#wattys2018]

Chapter forty-/trust damon to ruin the moment/

"Mr ruddocks-"

"Shut up." I call behind me.

I run across the mansion to find my room and am aware my ass is showing from the split in the hospital gown. Not sure why we needed this when we had a gang doctor... Damon and dan are literally running behind me too.

"Xavier, has anyone ever told you you ass is kinda flat looking?" Damon asked whilst panting and running.

"Flat? Fuck no. But, girls have tried to grab it." I laugh.

"Damon has a point." Dam mumbled.

"Stop looking at my ass dudes." I chuckle.

When i reach my room i swing the door open to find my dad crying on my bed. My smile completely falls.

I stop in my tracks. Ive never seen him like... this. So, so, caring. My shoulder is so doped up, i cant feel it. He stops what he's doing and looks up. To say he looked shocked was an understatement.

He slowly got up, raking his eyes up and down my alive form. He touched my arm. Does he think im unreal? He abruptly pulled me into a large man hug.

I didnt respond to it at first. But then i realised, my dad, is hugging me. Does that mean he cares? I wrap one arm at a time around him. Its not one of those man hugs where we slap each other across the backs or anything. This was a genuine hug. Plus, i think he took into consideration of my recent shot shoulder.

"I-I'm so sorry son." My dad whispers.

"Dad, its hardly your fault i got shot." I grumble. Dan and damon left a while ago it seems.

My dad pulled away. "Not that." He led me back to me bed and sat back down.

"Then what?" I frown.

"Your mother." He looked at me and tears threatened to spill over my eyes.

"Oh." I swallow the lump in my throat. Has he been thinking of it? I'd never had this conversation with my dad. Only dan, Damon and of course, Ashley.

"I- i should have done way more for you. It's just, the girl i knew and loved was loved by everyone at one point. Even you. She loved you when you were first born. Did you know you actually didnt have a crib when you first came home?" He smiled.

"Where did i sleep?" A tear trailed down my face. I didnt even know i was crying.

"In your mothers arms. She wouldn't put you down. Obviously i had a word with her when you were teething to put you the hell down because of your constant screaming." He chuckled and so did i. "But she did love you. Its when her mother died she became this other person. She started drinking. Neglecting you. Then obviously..."

"Dad." I croaked. "Im so sorry."

"What for?" His eyes were glistening. What i was about to say was hard to say to my dad. Especially him.

"For k-kill-killing h-her." Tears were coming faster. God, i could barely get it out.

"Oh son." He brought my head down on his shoulder and held it there. "I love you probably more than anything this world has to offer. I would rather you be here hating me then not be here at all. You did what any man would do in that situation. You protected yourself. Lord knows you took it for so long."

"Why didn't you say something?" I ask the one question bugging me. He looked away and sighed.

"There is no resonable excuse. I asked her where all your bruises were coming from when i saw you swimming with daniel in the pool house one day. She said you and daniel were fighting. I asked daniel. He said no fight took place. Obviously i confronted her. She admitted to it. I threatened to end her, to take you away and move from here. She told me that shed tell everyone i beat her. That i beat my whole family. Shed say shed make sure to tell you that as well. I couldnt have you growing up thinking i beat your mother." He shook his head and sighed.

"Obviously, i called her bluff. I wasnt going to allow her to carry this on. I told her I'd give her another chance if she'd cut the alcohol out. Go to therapy even. Every week I'd be home and she'd be sober, loving to you. Then one week i saw she nearly killed you. That was the worst day of my life. I'd had all your things packed until she came in and claimed she was going to kill herself. I thought she was just lying again. Then she held a knife to her wrists and cut down. She didn't bleed a lot, but enough to scare me. I then assigned someone to look after you while you were left with your mother. Cleary they didn't do a very good bloody job. Your mother was a darling when i met her. She was sweet. Kind. I guess i was soft."

Then my father did the one thing I'd never thought I'd ever see him do. A tear slipped down his face and into the crease of his lips. He looked at me. The blood vessels in his eyes for red raw. Tear kept slipping down. He was crying. The man was actually crying.

He was supposed to be a cold man. So he could do business with even the cruelest of men and not look scared. And here he was, crying to his son, and, apologising. I literally never expected to ever here this from my father. All this time I'd thought he couldn't care less.

"Xavier. I love you. Not because your my son, but because your the man i wanted you to be. Your strong. Your thoughtful. And god knows you love that girl ashley. I admire you." He smiled.

"Thanks dad." I smiled back. We both just stay there for a while.

One minute i was lying in a hospital bed, asleep. I was just listenung to dan and damon bicker. Then this... . My dad apologising to me.

"Right." He sniffed and wiped away the tears from his face. "I have to go get those reports."

"Reports?" I ask.

"Well you didn't think we all just suddenly stopped looking for miss greyson did you?" He laughed.

"Thank you. I mean it." I shook his hand and he went to exit the room. When he opened the door, damon fell in. He face planted the floor and grunted. "Damon what the hell?"

He looked up and he was crying. Like actually crying. Hysterically.

"That. Was so beautiful." Tears streamed down his face. He wiped them away sloppily. I look at my dad.

"Your choice of friends are quite peculiar." He frowned and smile sympathetically and left.

"Seriously?" I look down at him.

"What?" He stood up, brushing his knees. "Yes, i was listening." He sobered up and looked me dead in the eye. "Dude, how'd you feel?"

"Ask me tomorrow." I smile. "Now, my ass is showing and i have a girl to find."

"Yes!" Damon cheered. I walked to my drawers to pick some clothes out. I went to lift the hem of my gown over my head and saw Damon still in the room. When he made no move to get out when im getting changed i spoke.

"Damon."

"Yeah?"

"Get out."

"Oh shit, right." He slapped a hand over his eyes and walked into the side of the door and eventually left.

"God my friends are idiots." I mumble.