The Legend - A Gilmore Girls Fan Fiction

Chapter 28

I hailed a cab home, and walked into my apartment. I numbly sat the box of my belongings onto the kitchen table, and I sank down into a chair with my head in my hands. I had no idea what I was going to do losing my job – there was no way I could afford to continue paying rent just on child support alone – he gives us a generous amount, but even with that, I wouldn't have money for the other necessities such as electricity, and eating. I just wanted this to all be a bad dream that I could just wake up from, and I found myself wishing I had not gone off on the one person I could talk to and count on to try and cheer me up. And then I got mad at myself because I was finally starting to admit that the one person I wanted to turn to right now was Finn. He wasn't my boyfriend, we weren't even dating, but it's like I was already giving him boyfriend status in my head. And I knew I had messed up big time by going off on him the way I did. I trust Finn, and I know he would never do anything to hurt me or my daughter on purpose, and I said so many horrible things. I said things that I can never take back, and he may never forgive me for. I had every right to be upset, but I was well aware of how badly I over reacted to him.

That's when I realized I hadn't even heard from him since our fight. I started to prepare myself and convince myself that it was over – whatever it was that we had, it didn't matter anymore at this point anyway, because we were over. I had crossed the line, what I said was unforgivable, and he finally came to his senses and jumped ship and he is probably so ready to be rid of me that he's swam himself halfway back to Australia by now just to get a head start. And I missed him. God how I missed him, but he obviously didn't want to talk to me, or he would've called me, or texted me, or something. But there was nothing.

And then it hit me – I hadn't even looked at my phone since before the meeting, and my phone had been on silent because I was at work. Slowly, I got up and walked over to the kitchen table, and got into my purse that I'd put onto the kitchen chair. I reached inside and grabbed my phone, and much to my surprise, I had eight notifications – four text messages, three missed calls and a voicemail, all from Finn.

I breathed in a sigh of relief and a small smile crept onto my face. He wasn't gone. I didn't lose him. He wasn't mine, but he wasn't not mine, either. I unlocked my phone and scrolled through Finn's messages:

"Emma's back at school. Love, I'm so sorry. If there's anything I can do to make it up to you, please let me know"

"Love, please talk to me. I'm so so sorry. I hate that I upset you. I know you're angry, but please at least let me apologize"

"Please call me, Darling. I can't stand you being mad at me. Please. I'm sorry."

"Okay, I get it. I screwed up, and it's unforgivable. Just know that I'm so terribly sorry and I hope that we can move past this. I'm going to keep calling and texting until you finally answer. I'm not giving up"

I tossed the phone down on the table. I was so happy he hadn't disappeared, and I wanted so badly to fix things with him, and just let him take it all away, but after the day I had, I didn't feel up to doing anything. I just wanted to go to bed and sulk, fall asleep, and forget the awful day.

I guess I still forgot to turn the ringer back on my phone, because I could hear the vibration only of the incoming phone call. Part of me wanted to ignore it, because I really didn't feel like talking, but I involuntarily picked up the phone and answered it. "Hey" I said sadly, with a sniffle.

"Oh thank god, Love. I was worried I would never hear from you again! Are you crying?" he asked.

"Yeah" I whispered, my voice catching in my throat.

"Hey, why are you crying!? I know you're mad at me, but please don't cry" he said gently.

I broke down crying even harder as I spoke the words that were haunting me. "I lost my job today" I sobbed.

"What!? How did that happen!?" he asked.

"I couldn't concentrate during the meeting and he kept making me out to be this giant idiot – said I wasn't a team player and that they had no room for someone that couldn't take the job seriously. I needed that job! So bad! I don't know what the hell I'm going to do now!" I cried.

"Are you at home? Can I come over? I need to see you" he said.

As much as I wanted to be alone to wallow in my own sadness, something inside me said "yes."

"I'm dropping everything, I'll be right there" he promised.

* * *

There was a knock on my door and when I didn't answer, he let himself in cautiously. "Love? Are you in here?" he asked, and then he saw me curled up on the couch, hugging my knees to my chest, with my face buried into my knees sobbing. He closed the door gently and made his way over to me. "Come here" he whispered, pulling me to him. He pulled me into his lap and cradled me in his arms. "Shh" he whispered, just holding me tightly as I cried into his shoulder, and he ran his hand over the back of my hair. "Everything's going to be okay, Love. We'll get through this together" he whispered. I just buried my face into him further and continued crying. He patiently just held me as long as I needed him to, until I started to calm down on my own.