Keep holding on (sansX Depressed reader)

Trying...to MOVE ON!

The song is called, "creep" cover by Melanie Martinez, love it! Anyway! So...last we pick up was that you broke down in full of broken heart ...don't cry my darling *wipes meh tears* a broken heart can be fix right? I don't know but maybe? Anyway!...As always have a lovely day! Enjoy!
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*play song*
Y/N P.O.V
It's been 3 weeks since I've been in this stupid hospital....I woke up in a Machine pinching me like usual. Sans never came to see me anymore since that day I told him to stay away from me. My stomach hurting painfully, as my tears I still dripping from what I've deal with.

Apparently when I broke down the last time I saw sans, I guess sans saw me in pain so he carried me back in the bed. When I saw him again I just...pushed him away and said goodbye to him. Now I just...can't take it anymore.

I'm scared, I'm in pain! There is nothing that makes me better than just ending my own self. Frisk was the only hope tho, they would usually come to see me with flowers and a beautiful smile. I would always be happy seeing them tho, apparently frisk is almost done with their adventure to this.

One day they said, They wanted to leave and go home but they don't have anywhere to go at all, I told frisk that we both can figure a way to live together and that I would take care of them too. Frisk smiled and hugged me then went to finish more of their adventure.

I have about a few more weeks to be out of here and live a different life..or maybe...end my own terrible stupid life! My scars in my arms most healed but you see marks not blood in ways. I don't know what else to say but me being so...broken just feels very numb.

I mean despite this whole situation, I knew me and sans wouldn't last any longer...because it always happen to me. I've dated 4 guys and they all dumped me over cheating...and I thought me and Tyler would be one...but I was wrong.

I grabbed my phone...and pulled up an old song I played...

Melanie Martinez cover- Creep *this song*

When you were here before...
Couldn't look you in the eye~
You're just like an angel...
Your skin makes me cry.

You float like a feather~
In a beautiful world...
And I wish I was special,
You're so fuckin' special~

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.~

I don't care if it hurts...
I want to have control~
I want a perfect body...
I want a perfect soul...

I was just about to finish till I heard someone say, "I'm sorry..." I turned around but I didn't see anything at all. I began to try to finish the song but...I broke down in pain. I'm hurt, why can't this hurt GO AWAY! My chest burned so hard...and my tears felt like acid burning in my skin.

I didn't have anyone, I felt so alone...I hugged myself. I was afraid to be back to my old self...the haunting voices came back to get what's theirs back. "Useless...like always! Haha" they said. I gave myself up...and I felt nothing back darkness corrupting me.

I stood there feeling...broke, frisk came back and gave me a hug, I didn't hesitate to do anything...just there silent. Frisk dropped off food for me and then told me they were going to papyrus for...something.

I stood up after they left...and went out of the room to find something sharp. I found a small knife in a room where surgery occurs but I have to be careful so Alphys doesn't see me.

I went back to my room and placed the small knife right in front of me, I began to laugh and laugh while crying. I pushed the knife up and then ram it down towards my neck!!!!

...........

..................

..........................but I stopped, I struggle myself to push myself but my lovable side refuses while my darkness is trying to win over this fight. Love barely win...I let go of the knife and just threw it over the corner. I cried and cried sobbing down on the floor.

I wanted to end myself but I can't, I want someone to hold me...saying, "please hold on" but at the same time I just want to get over with so I can leave and be...nothing.

I stood up, grabbed my things...and left the hospital....I'm wanting to move on...but the darkness is chained to me where I can't even escape anymore....

SANS P.O.V
I stood there in shocked, I couldn't believe what y/n told me...I felt like it was my sailor and that she was right. I wanted to have a beautiful life but I fucked it up!

I'm never going to see her she said...but I need to, I want her more and more every day no matter what! My chest is begging to see her, my arms are waiting for that warm sensation I get to wrap around. My own self...was depressed.

I couldn't wait any longer...but I needed someone more than anything, but I lost that person...and it's time to move on right? I went to Sabrina's room and sabrina was sitting down reading a book.

I went and hug her...I even cried because I needed someone to hold me. Sabrina hugged me back, "there there...I'm sorry sans" she said. I hugged her even more tighter and tighter...I felt the love my heart is beating...but I didn't know what to do at this point.

Sabrina stand up to go to the bathroom while I couldn't wait, I decided to see my darling...again. I teleported to y/n room in the dark corner. As I did..I heard a beautiful singing voice.

It was y/n singing with the most...beautiful song ever, she almost started to cry and I stood there hearing it, "I'm sorry.." I said. When y/n turned around...I left. I came back in Sabrina's room big tears flowing through me.

I never thought to myself that...me...myself...would actually love someone that much more than papyrus. I care about papyrus but y/n...she was a lot different...and now that she's gone. I don't know what to do anymore....

I had the tears drip when Sabrina came back she ran up to me and hugged me, "shhh...it's okay sans..." she said to me. I felt like...it was her, I felt like y/n was right here with me...I remember when we both were together I would always have some issues and she be there for me.

I let go of Sabrina...and Sabrina came close to my face. I couldn't take it any longer...so...I pushed my face close that my teeth was touching her lips in a way that I kissed her. Sabrina kissed back...and I couldn't bare to feel any feelings anymore...I'm broken but I moved on....

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wings open towards my darkness, I felt the beautiful light and it felt so nice...but when the wings flew away from me, I was back into the darkness that was a silent...broken sound. I can't bare this any longer, I want this back...I need it! I need it! Help me....please...I don't want to be alone.
                 -Derpy13