Chapter Forty Six(Preparing for it)

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I've made it. I somehow survived going three weeks without making any sort of physical contact with Jerry
To be honest it's easier than people make it out to be. Sure I had to slip into a different human's dream every night, but hey I survived not being near my boyfriend.

I did make an interesting discovery; there are a lot of boys who have sexual dreams about me. Another weird thing that happened, the night I invited Jerry and the guys to my place, Tasia and Hyde hooked up. She keeps bragging about it, I take no notice of it and do whatever it is I do.

The one thing on my mind, and before my eyes, Jerry was getting better. At least he's looking better. After two weeks the glow had come back into his eyes and he wasn't looking as tired as he did before. Even seeing all this happening before me I wasn't ready to get back to that with him.

He still needs more time. My mind would say. My body kept arguing and saying he if he was well enough to walk he was well enough to fuck.

The hardest thing for me; every time he found the time to get me alone I'd come up with a stupid but reasonable excuse. I still can't.

Even after all the bitter things humanity has done, I should be willing to kill a human, I should be giddy with joy at the prospect of taking a human life.

In what left of my heart though, I can feel he's different. Maybe that's why it hurts so much.

Maybe that's why I'm unwilling to do it.

Aside from the mentall torture I put myself through,  the real reason these past three weeks have been a bummer, we've been finishing up our final exams, and somehow, every time me and Jerry end up in the same exams class and I have to keep myself from bouncing on him every time.
On top of that, due to my sexual strike, I haven't been able to focus on studying at all. So I'm worried that by choosing Jerry's life I've jeopardized my entire future. Of course I don't regret it. If I don't pass, that's okay.

Fortunately exams are over and now we seniors prepare for the ultimate high school ending.

Homecoming, or also known as prom.

It's going to be twice as awesome now because I've got my two babes of best friends by my side. Unfortunately Alec will also be there.

Though lately Alec hasn't been himself. I don't see him around school and he hasn't tried to confront me alone since that night. He seems to me changing, I wonder how long it'll last.

I step away from my locker and close it. Aside from staying away from Jerry, things have been falling perfectly into place. I sigh contentedly to myself and walk down the hallway. Joanna invited me and Tara to go shopping for our prom outfits. She also said Edward wouldn't be tagging along as Jerry had arranged for all the guys to get their tuxedos this very afternoon as well.

Boy I just hope that Jerry will still want to take me as his prom date. I wouldn't blame him if he didn't ask me.

I stop near the exit and look to see who's standing in front of me.

Nina.

She's been doing to me what I've been doing to Jerry. She's been avoiding me like a stray dog avoids the dogcatcher.  I believe this is the first time we've been together alone. It's a relief to see her and to see she's okay, though the scowl on her face shows anything but being alright. "I have one thing to say to you, Sarah Xavier,"She says, her hands on her hips and looking as adorable as ever. No wonder people think I'm odd. But you can't blame me, when a girl you like is mad at you, it's cute.

She softens her facial features and smiles like an angel. "Thank you. I think all my years of chasing boys turned me into something ugly,I turned ugly on the inside and the outside at that point. When we...had sex, it was the first time in a long time I felt wanted. For more than just my looks."

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