Girl of Never : Days to Love (Chat MD Series #4)

Day 360 : Yearn

Yearn
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Malaki naman 'yung mug ng kape namin pero naubos din agad. Nag-usap lang kami ni Harry tungkol sa Genetics, lumipad na ang oras.

"Ubos mo na?" tanong ko sa kanya kahit alam ko ang sagot.

He showed me his mug. Confirmed. Said ang kape.

Hindi ko siya maalok ng refill dahil baka mahirapan na siyang makatulog.

"I guess you have to go home..." sabi ko.

"Yeah. Maybe."

Pero walang tumatayo sa amin sa mesa.

"Kailangan mo nang matulog, 'di ba? Maaga ka pa bukas sa conference mo," sabi niya.

"Yeah." Napabuntonghininga ako at tumitig kay Harry. I really want to be with him longer but I don't know how to ask him to stay.

His apartment is nearby. He's not drunk. There's no rain nor thunder. Walang rason para ialok ko ang bahay ko sa kanya.

Dapat yata, alak na lang ang ininom namin. Pero may conference ako and I couldn't afford to get drunk tonight.

Ngumiti siya sa'kin. "Ano'ng iniisip mo, Aling Jia?"

"Wala." Labag sa loob ko nang tumayo ako. "I'll walk you to the door."

Lumakad kami papunta sa pinto. Mabagal. May makulit na ngiti si Harry na hindi ko alam kung para saan.

We stood by the door.

"So..."

"So..."

Nakatingin kami sa isa't isa. Naghihintayan ng hindi ko alam kung ano.

"Wala ka nang iaalok?" tukso niya.

Napasimangot ako. Ang obvious ko siguro na ayaw ko pa siyang paalisin. Tapos, tutuksuhin pa 'ko. "Wala na."

Why isn't it raining tonight?

"Hindi umuulan," sabi niya.

"Yeah."

"Maghapon na rin tayong magkasama."

"Uhum."

"My apartment's nearby."

"I know."

"It's late and you have a conference tomorrow."

I sighed.

"Uuwi na muna ako," sabi niya.

"Yeah. You have to go home. Goodnight uli."

Nakangiti siya nang buksan ko ang pinto. "Goodnight, Jianna."

Pinanood kong lumabas ng pinto si Harry at lumakad palayo. Then I proceeded upstairs, sa kwarto ko.

I took a quick shower before changing into my night dress. I lay down the bed with thoughts of the day.

Abusada ang puso ko. I'm with Harry all day. Bakit parang kulang pa? I want him nearby—closer than two blocks. Closer than the small distance we maintain throughout the day.

I miss him more now, more than I have missed him the last few months. I didn't know it was possible to feel like this.

And I haven't heard it again—his three words.

May lumuwag bang turnilyo sa isip ko as they term it? Am I cheap? Gosh.

I decided to read a thesis by my bedside table para mailayo ang isip ko kay Harry at makatulog. But the doorbell rang.