Start Again

Chapter Twenty-Two

"Which airport is she going to?"

"It's too late."

I came to a stop. "Did the plane leave?"

"No, but it leaves in an hour. There's no way you'll get there in time at this time of day. And even if you get there in under an hour, I'm sure she will be seated."

"I have to try. Which airport?"

"Incheon."

I hung up the phone and kept running.

You barged into my life when I didn't want to let anyone in. With the amount of friendship rejections I had from people in Hoju, I decided I'd be better off alone. People weren't nice when I got here, only reaffirming my initial opinion: people only make friends with people who will get them ahead, who are useful. Who was I? I was a foreigner with no wealth, no interesting story, nothing. I wasn't useful to anyone. But time and time again, we bumped into one another, and one day you sat there and listened to me cry. If anything, I tarnished your reputation. I'm sure some strangers think ill of you. But you didn't care. You just wanted to be there for me. You wanted to be my friend.

A bus in the distance caught my attention. Heading to: Incheon Airport.

The bus edged off from the side of the road, slowly creeping into the traffic.

"Wait!" I screamed, running faster.

But it was already gaining too much speed.

I doubled over, gasping for air. A stitch had grown in my stomach. My head was pounding from dehydration and my hangover. But the throbbing of my heart overruled both pains. I couldn't let her leave.

Your kindness and friendship allowed me to rebuild myself and forget the past. After you offered me your hand, others seemed to open up to me. The three friends I made in Korea made me believe that it was only the place I was from that was wrong, not me. Somewhere out there in the world are many people who want to be my friend. I am forever grateful that you were the first person to lend me your hand when I needed it.

As I stood by the side of the road, clutching my side in pain, I waved my free hand in the hope a taxi would pull over.

But I messed up. I wish we could have stayed friends. I wish I could have stayed, finished my degree, and had many more fun memories with you. But I ruined our friendship by falling in love with you.

When suddenly, a motorbike pulled up in front of me.

How is that a problem? On the day we planned to meet to answer each other's questions, I walked past a café where you were sitting with another woman, holding her hand. Hye Ri tried to say there could be a misunderstanding, but I saw how she looked at you. I could barely see your face, but it was difficult to find any other reading to the situation for me. I should have sought clarification from you. I should have asked if this was the girl you liked, but I feared the answer too much. Another part of me thought that perhaps you wanted to two-time me with her. But I don't believe that you're that type of person. If she's the one in your heart, then I wish you two well. I really do. You deserve every bit of happiness, Joon Soo.

"Are you running after Audrey?" Suk Do Yun asked me.

I nodded.

"You don't have a girlfriend, do you?"

I shook my head, still gasping for air.

"Get on."

So now I'm doing what I do best. I'm running away.