No Control

A Little Too Much

Pic is how I sorta see Erik as- now enjoy!

Chapter 34:

LIAM

"Are you ready?" I heard Zayn ask, putting his hand on my shoulder as we sat in the car, looking into the the little coffee house that my mum was waiting in. It was hard to think that I was going to see her again. A part of me wanted to run far away and cower, but the other part wanted to tell her actually the kind of hell she put me through with my dad.

"I don't think you can ever really be ready for something like this." I mumbled out, taking a deep breath and turning to Zayn. I squeezed his hand and gave him a small smile. "I'm glad you're here though. Thank you."

Zayn smiled back, leaning in and kissing me before saying "I'll always be here. Wanna go in now?" He asked, and I took another glance at the place before nodding. There was no running away from this, and I knew I had to face her eventually. It might help me get rid of my demons.

We both got out of the car and Zayn jogged to my side, taking my hand in his before we walked to the front doors of the place. I felt breathless as soon as we walked inside, looking around for the lady that I use to love to call my mother. Funny how that all changed so quickly- and at such a young age.

Zayn led me over to a table, where a lady was looking right at us, tears filling her eyes. I knew automatically that she was my mum. Everything about her was pretty much the same, even thw tears forming in her eyes were familiar. The only thing different was that she looked happy to see me.

I held my breath as we walked towards her, squeezing Zayn's hand tighter and looking anywhere but at that table. I was freaking out inside, and I was pretty sure it showed on the outside as well because Zayn stopped walking and turned to me, cupping my face in his hands.

"Hey, you're gonna be okay, Li. I promise you. I'll be right by you the whole time, and anytime you want to leave we can. You're so strong for doing this, Liam, and I'm so proud, love." He said, and I nodded, gulping before giving him a small smile.

He kissed my cheek, giving me a little more courage to actually do this. We walked the rest of the way to the table, and I felt more confident, until my mum stood up, holding her arms out to hug me. I wasn't ready for that.

I cringed back from her, watching as her face filled with disappointment. How else did she expect me to react to that? I can't just accept her back into my life as if nothing ever happened in the past. As if I never walked out of that door all those years ago.

"I'm sorry." She said gently, looking at me with desperate eyes. "I just can't believe it's really you. Oh, Liam. My baby." She said, and I turned away, sitting on the inside of the booth so Zayn could sit on the outside, almost like a barrier.

My mum stopped talking, wringing her hands nervously as she sat down opposite of us. "Uh, you must be Liam's... boyfriend?" She questioned, not quite knowing our relationship. I really didn't like her asking it even talking to Zayn, but I sat silently as they interacted.

"Yes. I'm Zayn. I've known Liam for a long time." He said, shaking my mum's hand, and she gave a sad smile.

"So you know about-"

"The way you and dad treated me? Yes, he knows." I said, speaking up, and I barely even recognized my own voice. It was so full of distaste and resentment. I heard Zayn whisper my name, trying to get me to calm down. I huffed and looked out of the window.

"It's okay. I understand. You have every right to be mad, Liam. You have every right to not want to speak to me." She said, but silence fell over us necause there was just way too many emotions pounding around in my head. I wanted to yell at her, cry from frustration, hug her because deep down inside I still loved my mum, and I also wanted to never see her again. I had no clue what to do. Why did I agree to this?