Letters to Cleo #Wattys2016

Chapter 43

Malungkot akong tumayo galing sa kama ko. Babalik na ako sa Batangas at hindi ko alam kung sa isang linggo ay may babalikan pa ba ako dito sa Maynila o kung dapat pa ba akong bumalik. Pagkatapos naming magsagutan kagabi ay umalis na ako. Wala na akong magagawa kung hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa rin n'ya napapatawad ang pamilya ko. I know I promised her tito that I will take care of her from now on but how will I do that if she doesn't wanna be with me? Ano ba ang dapat kong gawin? Should I still wait for her or do I give up? And if I decide to wait for her, for how long?

Naligo ako at agad naghandang umalis na. I decided to just buy coffee along the way and eat breakfast at home.

In a matter of hours ay nakarating ako sa bahay. Nadatnan ko pang kumakain ng agahan ang Nanay at Tatay sa patio. They invited me to eat with them. While waiting for the helper to set up another place for me, Tatay asked me why Ailee wasn't with me.

"I don't think I can see her anymore."

"But why?" Nanay inquired.

"Medyo mahabang kwento po but the bottomline is she still has not forgiven us."

"Akala ko okay na kayo? Di ba sabi mo..."

"That's what I thought, too, 'Nay. But we had a talk last night and it got kinda ugly."

"You had a fight?"

"Parang ganun nga po."

"Just give her time, anak. She's still grieving, you can't expect her to just accept everything right away."

"Alam ko naman po 'yun, Nanay. Kaya nga umalis na lang muna ako."

"Are you going to see her next week?"

"I don't really know if she'd still want to see me. Sa totoo lang po naguguluhan ako. Nung nagkaayos po kami nasabi ko na sa sarili kong I'm never letting her go again pero ngayon hindi ko na po alam kung anong dapat kong gawin. Hindi ko po alam kung dapat pa ba akong maghintay sa kanya."

Naputol ang usapan namin nang may marinig kaming isang pamilyar na boses. "Tito Caloy, Tita Amy!"

Napatingin kaming lahat sa kanya. It was Adrienne, the youngest daughter of one of Tatay's golf buddies. Matagal ko na s'yang kilala dahil bata pa lang kami ay nakakasama ko na siya sa mga parties.

"Oh hello hija!" ang masayang bati naman ni Nanay. "Have you had breakfast? C'mon join us."

Nagbeso siya kay Nanay at Tatay kaya tumayo na rin ako to the same. Pinaupo siya ni Nanay sa tabi ko habang tuluy-tuloy pa rin ang kwentuhan nila. Simula nung lumuwas ako sa Manila for college ay hindi ko na siya nakita. But when I came back just a few months ago ay nagkita ulit kami at simula noon ay medyo napapadalas na ang pagbisita n'ya dito sa amin.

"I was here last weekend pero wala ka naman."

"Oo, Addie. Lumuwas ako sa Manila."

"Buti now you're here."

"I just got in, actually."

"Ah really? Galing ka ulit sa Manila?"

"Yeah."

"You've been going there a lot lately. Bakit, are you attending to some business?"

Business? Hmmm... yeah, Ailee is my business now. It's my business to take care of her... or so I thought. "Ah hindi naman. Well something like that. Medyo importante kasi kaya I had to keep going back there."

"Ah okay. So, do you have plans for today?"

"Wala naman but I want to just stay here and rest. Mamaya I'm going to check also on some of the reports I need to give Tatay."