Dan Howell
Phil's curious blue eyes stare at me, expecting an answer but I don't know what to say. Do I tell him I'm just messing with him? I don't think I am, because if I was, I wouldn't wait for more than three times to fuck him, would I? What is it then? I don't think I have any strong feelings towards him, but I don't feel like this is just a hook up either. I am confused myself as Phil awaits an answer.
"I-I don't know I haven't thought about it," I admit, and look at him him again. He looks hurt, and I don't know what to do or say to make him feel better.
"So, you were just," he closes his eyes and sighs. "You were just messing with me?" He asks me, climbing off my lap and grabbing his shirt from the floor, holding it against his chest. The heat that filled the room minutes ago has completely dissolved as I think for an appropriate response.
"I, um, I don't know, Phil. I don't know what to call this," I wave my hands between us and he nods, looking away. He puts on his shirt, and runs a hand through his hair.
The air has thickened between us as he awkwardly stands and I sit shirtless on the couch. It feels unnatural sitting on this couch, in this living room. I never really come here, I just stay in my room upstairs or go to the kitchen.
"I better go," Phil mumbles, picking his bag off the couch and I want to stop him. It feels nice to have someone in the house for once and I want him to stay longer but I don't know what to say.
"So are we going to the animal shelter tomorrow?" I ask him and he doesn't look at me when he nods.
"I'll text you the details," he says and begins to make his way to the door. I sigh and rub my hands over my face before following him towards the main entrance.
"Wait, how are you getting back?" I ask him, and he seems to realise the same thing as he stops.
"I-um, I don't know, I'll call PJ maybe." He shrugs and I grab his wrist before he can leave.
"I can drop you?" I offer, and his eyes finally meet mine as he seems to think over it. After a few seconds he gives in and nods and I smile at him.
"Okay, just let me grab my shirt." I tell him and he blushes, nodding once again as I walk to the couch putting on my shirt and grabbing my keys.
--
