steve harrington hadn't lived in hawkins his whole life, he had wanted to leave who he was and what he did behind him, long forgotten- everything was going fine until a few people of his past came knocking and steve was left to face the same devil t...
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Trigger warnings for this chapter - the gate, possession, the shadow, the upside down, guilt, depression, death, Roy, munch, demogorgan, tunnels..
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Before anyone knew it, a whole month had past and it was now december 13th.
Eleven was successful in closing the gate -with Hopper and McKenzie's back up- which had settled the group because who wants to keep getting in death defying situations?
Joyce, Jonathan and Nancy were successful in getting Will unpossessed by the shadow as Nancy had explained to the group how the part of the shadow monster had leaked into their world after it left Will.. so it was only a matter of time before it somehow came back.
But most of Hawkins had remained the same, just like before the Upside Down was known to the group and just like before the Tillman siblings had moved there.
And as they were finally able to have a funeral for both Bob and Barb, Gator couldn't help but feel more guilty now knowing what he knows.
Had he accidentally got the demogorgan to kill Barb just like he did Bob?
Did he really almost kill Ezrae back in the tunnels?
Could he trust himself around people?
Those were the questions that ran in his head, and for a second- only a second- he wish he was found by Roy and Munch.
The thoughts kept getting worse the longer Gator was stood looking at the grave of Barb and they only seemed to get worse the longer he stood there.
He only woke up a week ago from a 3 week coma after what happened in the tunnels and he did wish it had ended him there,
but he was relieved when he found out the kids were all okay, as well as the rest of the group-
even Billy was okay and a part of Gator felt relieved at that too,
even if the guy was a major asshole just like how Gator used to be.. he couldn't help but feel bad for the guy somehow.
Especially when Billy had no one, so Gator opted to be there for him even if it was to get his ass beat by the blond again,
because Gator knew what it was like to deal with shit on his own and he wasn't going to let Billy go down a path that Gator had, that's for sure.
Gator's right arm was put in a blue cast seeing as his wrist was broken and he couldn't help but feel the irony of him trying to escape his last but now he almost looked and felt exactly like he did before moving there-
the only differences being that he didn't act like that anymore- or at least tried not to- and that he also had loads of people on his side, even though they didn't exactly know who he really was still.
Only the Byers, Hopper and El knew- and of course his sisters McKenzie and Ezrae- and Gator really wanted to keep it that way but he felt the whole persona of Steve Harrington was slipping away and in some way, Gator felt relieved by it.
But there was also a sense of identity loss because who was Gator really?
The persona he built up as Steve Harrington?
Or the Gator Tillman he was born and made into back in North Dakota?
Or..
was he someone else entirely?
He felt like all his life was some sort of stupid play or movie,
always acting one way or another because it was what he had to do,
