Summer Nights -- Bojan Cvjetićanin

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Florence woke up in her new apartment, for the first time. She smiled as she looked around, realizing she now actually lived in her favourite city. After stepping out of the bed to put on her robe, she walked to the little balcony that was attached to her bedroom. She opened the curtains and looked out over the streets in front of her. They were slowly starting to get busier with people heading to work.

After making some breakfast for herself Florence got ready for the day, and texted Iris to say good morning. 

Florence walked out of her apartment, onto the streets. She clung onto the bag that hung over her shoulder, as she tried to navigate through the city she just moved in. She tried to remember the way from the last time she was there, which succeeded, as she reached the cafe she wanted to go to.

Florence sat down at the same table she did five and a half years ago. She looked around the café, which hadn't changed at all, except for the people in it. She took a sip of her coffee, quickly observing the people around her. Far in the back there were two teen girls, and at the table next to her sat a mother with her young daughter. A few tables further were a few students working and laughing together. Florence smiled at the sight of them, as they remembered her of herself and Iris. 

She grabbed her laptop from her bag and opened it. She was supposed to write a script for a commercial for her new job, but she couldn't figure out what words to use. She sat back into her chair, playing with the rings on her fingers. She looked at the newest one, that she got five and a half years ago. She smiled, remembering who gave it to her. Florence looked back at the screen of her laptop, narrowing her eyes in thought. 

In her head, she was going through all the possibilities of the sentence she wanted to write, but she disliked all of them. She sighed and closed her laptop, figuring she could work on it later. The students were loudly giggling, and Florence could hear them mentioning they liked some singer. Just as she was putting her laptop in her bag, her phone lit up. 

Iris

8.00

Good morning :)
How are ya today?

9.00

I'm alright
Missing you though

I miss you too
How's Lily?

She's good
She misses you 

I miss her too
Give her a kiss for me okay?

I will!
Have fun working today 😘

You too xx

Florence grabbed her journal and a pen, and she looked at the earlier entries. Suddenly remembering she brought one of her old diaries, she got it out of her bag and looked at the first entry. 

20th of July 2017

Dear Bojan,

I don't know why I'm addressing this to you, since I know you will never read it. I will never see you again. Three days ago I found out I'm pregnant, with your baby. In two days I'm marrying. Not you. I don't even know the guy I'm marrying. I'm scared Bojan, I don't know what to do. If you were here you'd say that everything will be fine, we'll find a solution together. But you're not. You're not here. I will never forgive myself for leaving you. I could've fled. We could've fled. From my parents, from this future. We'd have figured this out. Iris thinks I'm crazy for believing that, since we only knew each other for a week. But I know it. We could've. And if we didn't work out, at least we would've had the time to really experience what we could've been. We would've figured out what to do with this baby, I could have avoided this horrid marriage. I wish we did. I wish we could. My heart hurts for what could've been. It's the only thing I feel. The pain in my chest. I feel so empty, Bojan. I shouldn't. I know I shouldn't. I'm about to marry one of the richest guys in the country, for fucks sake. I should feel scared, excited and happy. I'll be settled, and taken care of. Why do I not want this? Why am I resisting this? I feel so stupid that I'm even writing this, asking you these questions. As if you would answer. 

My parents are back here too, they ignore me. Despise me, probably. The only person who talks to me in this house is Joanna. If this kid is a girl I'll probably name her Joanna. Or Lily, I love that name. Joanna is like the loving mother I never had. But I don't like people naming their kids after family members, that's always awkward. Anyways, I'm trailing off. 

My wedding dress arrived yesterday. It is stunning. It's very much like the wedding dress I always dreamed off. I wish I could've worn it marrying someone I love. Maybe when I'm studying I can use it for a film too, it's a very good dress for fleeing a wedding. I think that would look very cinematographic. 

It's late, I'm going to sleep.

xx Your Flo

Florence smiled, blinking the tears out of her eyes after reading the entry. She remembered that week like it was yesterday. She closed the journal, making a mental note to read more of the entries later on. Grabbing her current journal again, she started writing in it. She wrote down what had happened the past few days, her thoughts on things on the news, her thoughts on the journal entry she had just read, and how much she missed Iris and Lily, how she wished she could tell them everything.

A waitress approached her, asking if she wanted a refill. "Yes, thanks." Florence smiled. She had learned to speak Slovene the past few years, so she could fulfill her dream of living in Ljubljana. The past two days she had been really trying it out on the people here, and she was so proud of herself for being able to speak the language.

She started writing about that, and took a sip of the coffee the waitress had just given her. The teen girls at the back we're loudly discussing, and Florence rolled her eyes. She picked up a little about guys, and then tried to block the sound by putting her headphones on. She left one ear open, so she could still hear something, and put on her playlist. 

In Your Arms by Chef'Special started playing and a small smile appeared on Florence's face. She wanted to continue writing, but didn't have much to write anymore. She figured she had some inspiration for the script again, and grabbed her laptop out of her bag again, but when she did something fluttered out of it. She picked it off the floor, looking at what it is. 

Looking at the faded polaroid photo, memories flooded back into her head. She smiled at them, but quickly put the picture back in her bag. Florence didn't like thinking about those memories, they made her heart hurt more than they made it happy.

Sunk in her thoughts she opened her laptop, and ideas quickly came out. She was so focused writing, that she didn't notice the students and teens suddenly falling silent. Nor did she notice someone walking up to her, "Flo?" The man said, a little uncertain. Florence looked up, her eyes met his. "Bojan?" She asked, but she knew it was him. Like she could ever forget that voice.

Like she could ever forget those eyes.