19. The Heartbreaker's Club

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**Trigger Warning**
This chapter contains talk of death/suicide and mature subject matter
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**Trigger Warning**This chapter contains talk of death/suicide and mature subject matter⚠️

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Haunting- Halsey
🎶

"Fuck"

Shivering into my knees, I woke myself up out of another black out. It wasn't like the typical ones I had, this was different. I remembered turning but I still felt I was in my human body, seeing distorted shapes and colours but still vibrant. But then everything went black, my memory wiped.

I turned to lay over onto my back, as the hot rain drops hit my face, wincing in pain as my body felt like it had been beaten up. The night sky was slowly turning into early morning as I laid there emotionless now.

Empty and broken.

I made the conscious decision to not get up at all. I was to die here, wherever that was. I was naked and cold and had no intention of trying to find my clothes, my phone or to find out what I did last night. I turned for the first time, that was all I knew. The rage I had felt was so substantial, I figured it was the only explanation for it.

But I didn't care.

I knew they were all probably looking for me by now, all running after their Princess Athena, in a sad and pathetic attempt to fight over who was the lesser of two evils.

I hated that I loved Jimin so much, that as heavy as this heartbreak was, I still couldn't help but wonder if he was okay.

'How sick.'

He didn't deserve my forgiveness. He was right, he didn't deserve me.

I looked up at the violet and pink sky and prayed to a god I knew didn't exist, that I wanted to be put to death. I lost my family, the love of my life and my will to fucking live. Clara would make it without me, she'd thrive. She managed to survive it all, she would probably be better off without me too.

'Everyone would.'

I felt my tears start up again, as I leaned over on my side and grabbed a fist full of dirt and leaves, making a fist to try and release some of the anger. My hands were caked in dried blood, and I could still taste the animal's remains on my lips.

I cried out as my chest began to burn again. I curled myself up again against the cold earth, feeling my eyes grow heavy, my mind spinning. I gave in and felt myself slipping back into darkness again.

"I hope nobody ever finds me again."

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