Erratic // Thomas+Female OC & Newt+Male OC

Chapter Forty-Two : Road Trip

"I watched all the other Gladers slowly start to find themselves once again but... I just... couldn't." He told me with a low voice. "I thought there was something wrong with me because I never felt like me. I was never happy with the person I was. And then when the Gladers started dying... I just felt useless."

"That's terrible." I said and Newt laughed as he took some bandages that he must have stolen from the others.

"Yeah, it was." He admitted. "But the worst part of it all was thinking that I was alone when I wasn't."

Now I knew why he was bringing all of this up to me. He wanted me to talk. Maybe not to him, but to somebody. But I couldn't. I always tried to, but when it came down to it, I could never do it. One of the reasons I lost Joey was because I refused to let him in on what I was thinking or what I was feeling. He felt like I shut him out. Which I did.

"How did you fix it?" I asked curiously and Newt looked down to the ground for a second before looking up to meet my eyes.

"I jumped off the Maze wall."

Oh

Not exactly what I was thinking

"I didn't die, as you can see." He laughed but I couldn't find it in myself to laugh with him. "I snapped my leg in three bloody places. It's why I got my limp."

Who would have thought.

Newt the softie

Always the ray of sunshine

Wasn't always that sunny

He had his rain clouds.

"What did you do?" I asked him and Newt looked back to me confused. "How did you stop feeling that way?"

"Ah, well, you won't like the answer to that." He told me while putting a reassuring hand on my knee. "I talked to the people who care about me."

"Newt..."

"It took me almost dying and cutting everyone out of my life to realize that I was never alone." He said to me with a smile. "I dug all of my feelings so deep inside that I almost destroyed myself because of it. Don't make the same mistake I did."

He didn't question who my mother was. He didn't question why I never told them that I was the Scorch Reaper. He never questioned why I never told Joey he was my brother. He didn't need to. He knew all I needed was someone being there even if I tried to push him away. That boy was a beacon of wisdom that I never thought of talking to. He was a good kid.

"Your good for him." I said to Newt as he wrapped up the scars across my chest and zipped up my jacket for me. "Desmond. He's lucky to have you."

"And you too." Newt mentioned, helping me up to my feet.

"We'll see about that."

***

There's this switch in my brain

One that controls my humanity

It was the difference between Frankie Buck

And the Scorch Reaper

Sometimes I can control it

And sometimes I can't

This was one of those times.

The moment Newt lead me inside of the room with the others, the first person I saw was Marcus sitting bloodied up in a chair while Jorge tried to get him to talk. I knew Marcus for a long time and he tormented me like my mother did, just never to the extreme she took it. But seeing him there in front of me set me into a fit of rage only violence could solve.