Once Upon A Stranger "Islamic Story" #Wattys2016

Chapter 09 : WeAk but Not DefeAted

She Stood Under The rain, Alone ,

Above her a gray cloudy sky that she couldn't look at,
she felt the rain drop going deep into her hair and reaching her skin,
Yet she didn't move. 

Nobody lived in her shoes, 

Nobody saw the storms she had crossed
Nobody knows that the rain won't make her move
Cause simply she learned how to dance in the middle of a storm, under the rain .

Time passes very slow when you're hurt, broke, every minute seems endless.  Yet in the middle of that you receive a text, a reminder or an image from a friend telling you it will pass, just keep your faith strong in Allah, you can't help the smile in your face, to take away the pain, to me it did more, that smile gave me strength,  through the pain and ashes in my heart I had managed to smile and to keep it, to defeat the pain, instead of thinking of all the bad things that happened to me I need to focus on the good stuff because inside all this injury there is a comfort, there is an ease; a benefit,  I have been  blind and  couldn't see it, I let all my focus on the bad things but it's time to change that, he hurted  me and gave me a rare opportunity in the same time, I focused on his word and neglect the gift he gave me, his words didn't change his mind, he still think it's me who should take and receive it and I will in Shaa Allah, it's not every day I receive a scholarship, an opportunity to follow up with my study, his conditions are acceptable so I'm so much going to take it, I don't care what Yousef thinks about it, it's not his life, not his decision to make, surely I should ask for his opinion but I don't want to and I won't, he will only discourage me as always and  I won't let him do that nor do I want to share anything with  him anymore.

 I went to pray Ishaa, I thanked and praised Allah so much, for not giving up on me, staying by my side, keeps on giving me those little shining stars to make my life brighter, all the good things that happened, it was his way to keep me strong, each time I am saddened, he will give me something good to take away my sorrow, to help me to keep moving on, I thanked him for all the things he gave me,  hoping that I survived, that I passed the tests he sends me, hoping he's pleased with me.

I put the prayer rug in its place, took off my headscarf, then went to my bedroom, wore my pajama and went to bed, once my head was on the pillow I slept immediately as I haven't in a long time, so peacefully, I felt safe for the first time since the party night.    

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I waked up early today, feeling a lot of energy inside of me as I haven't in a long time, after the prayer, I took my breakfast quietly listening to the rain sound, it's the first autumn rain, I can smell from my place the wet dirt, so much I loved it, the sound; the smell, it gives me more energy. I dressed up quickly, wore my black coat, put my red scarf on my head then headed to work.

Busy streets, people walking fast, in all directions, it's already 8O'Clock, unlike usually, I walked slowly under the rain, trying to enjoy it as much as I could, the inner peace and happiness it gave me was unexplainable. 

Once I arrived to work, I headed straight to the Clara's office; I had made my mind, perhaps my marriage is in ruin, destroyed, but my work won't be, I won't lose it all, I won't let everything crush in my life and just stare at it.

Strangely today, Clara didn't see me standing in front of her desk, she seems to be very occupied today, her eyes and hands moving fast, yet she is always busy, it's not easy to be the boss's secretary, she has an endless list of things to do perfectly, somehow today, she didn't say a word to me, maybe she is avoiding me but then again I thought why would she do that, it makes no sense.