27 - Reality Bites

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If I have any chance of getting out of Hell, I gotta bleed demons dry

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If I have any chance of getting out of Hell, I gotta bleed demons dry. It seems to be my only option at this point.

The trouble is, my only donor is Finn, and he's no dummy. Any chance I think I have at killing him, he stops me. He's completely cut me off.

Needless to say, staying in Hell has gotten a whole lot tougher.

Everything hurts even though I haven't gone back to my torture chamber. It must be the demon blood exiting my system. It's not killing me, though sometimes the pain suggests otherwise. I feel like I've come down with a fever, and I'm moving through water. My thoughts feel the same way.

There is no happiness here. There is only pain, false hope, and suffering. Oh, and how can I forget biting words that still echo in my mind from all my sessions?

Demons that walk by taunt me like I'm some freak zoo animal. I don't give in to their mockery. I don't give them the attention they so desperately want. The best place for me to be right now is here. Or preferably in my own mind, where I can make things much better. Reality needs to take a break from me for a while, or forever.

I look through bleary eyes as my cell door opens. It's a stranger, not Finn, who enters. His features are skewed by the lack of light around us. He takes timid steps as though he's afraid of me. Maybe the talk spread through Hell. Maybe they think I'm a threat now. Yeah, some threat. Weak as shit.

"If I were you, I'd walk back out that door," I croak, sitting up from the dirty floor. "I'm not here for entertainment. If you poke the bear, I'll tear you apart."

"You really don't look like you're in the position to do that, let alone make threats," says the shadow. He advances closer, taking small steps. "I'm here to rescue you."

A small burst of energy comes back to me, out of fear. I scurry to a corner of my cell, my body not thanking me in the process. "I'll get five steps out before I'm thrown back in. I'm not buying the giving-me-false-hope angle."

"Willa, please—"

"Keep my name out of your mouth!" I'm not surprised that he knows it.

The demon closes in cautiously. Beside him is a familiar blade. Unwise to wield a weapon that can kill you. Am I even capable of killing him, even if it is a demon? A life is still a life...

What does it matter? I've got blood on my hands. What's one more demon?

If I kill him, more will come. It won't make a difference. It may make me feel better, though. If I can't get a hit on Finn, one of these guys may work.

As the demon reaches for me, I reach for his silver blade. It's a wrestling match, with me pinned against the wall. I kick out with my legs, hoping to make him stumble.

"Willa, I don't want to hurt you," he grunts.

"Demons lie." I use my scraggly nails to scratch at his face. He winces but doesn't loosen his grip on the blade. "It's all that you do."

A small rage bursts in me. Rage at demons. Rage at their words. They can't tell a truth to save their life.

When I manage to wrestle the blade into my own hands, the demon jumps back as I swipe. He doesn't bolt for the open cell door, he continues to move away at my lunging attempts to kill him. If I leave him alive, it's one more body that will come after me once I make my escape.

"Willa—" the demon tries. He grabs hold of my arm, the one not holding the blade.

I use the close proximity, push myself forward, shoving the blade into his chest. He doesn't let out a scream, rather a pained grunt. His eyes widen in shock, his mouth open in a wordless scream. I rip the blade from the demon, keeping it in a tight grip at my side.

Something isn't right. The way the demon exits the body...it's not in black smoke. Light bursts from his body, and I stumble back into a corner, shielding my eyes, clutching the blade close.

When the light fades, I straighten up, blinking a few times. What? The demon isn't the body on the floor. No, no, that's not right. I saw a demon. He was trying to bait me. It couldn't be...

I'm too stunned by the kill to make a dash for freedom. Before my mind can catch up with the fact, black-eyed bodies pile in. Three block my exit. One more shoves his way in through the blockade—Finn.

"Whatcha doing there, Wills?" Finn frowns when his eyes fall onto the silver blade. "What do you got there?"

I keep the weapon close. "Let me out of here."

"Did you forget your math? Four against one. We got powers. You've got a sewing needle." Finn steps further in, takes a glance down at the body. "Wow, turning against your friends. Never thought I'd see the day."

"N-no," I whisper, taking another look at the fallen body in the cell. He looked nothing like Cas before. Why does he now? This is a trick. They're trying to convince me that I've killed Cas. I haven't, it was a demon. I know it was. "That's not Cas. Hell is...Hell is playing with my head."

"Oh, no, Wills, this time it isn't." Finn rounds around Cas's body, pulls me from my corner. He knocks the blade out of my hand, out of my reach, as he lugs me towards the body. Finn sends me on my knees, and tears leak from my eyes as I inspect closer.

It's still a trick. It's not Cas. There's no way that I, a freaking sixteen-year-old, could've killed a freaking angel. Hunter's daughter or not, there's just no way...

"He must not have wanted to hurt you," Finn hisses in my ear. "His mistake. He left himself vulnerable."

"What are we doing with the body?" asks one of the members of the blockade in front of my escape route.

"Well, we need to show the king, obviously. It'll give him something good to think about. We should also grant him an audience with the one who made it all possible."

Meet the King of Hell? No thanks. "N-no," I say again, sniffling. "I won't go."

"Frankly, I wouldn't pass up the chance. He may just give you a reward. Anything you want."

Bull. "Doubt it. I've got a list of demands. I highly doubt he'd want to sit and listen to it all."

"You won't know unless you go. We'll give you some time to think on it. In the meantime, we need to get your unwelcome guest out of here."

Finn keeps hold of me as the three demons drag Cas's body out of my cell. I'm pulled to my feet before shoved away, against a wall. Nothing holds me except Finn's magic. I watch through bleary eyes as the silver blade is plucked from the ground.

"I'll be keeping this."

"It should be mine," I say hollowly. "I made the kill."

"And let you keep something you can stake me with later? Uh-uh."

Once Finn exits and the cell door shuts, I'm released from my magical pinning. My palms are scratched upon landing. I bow towards the ground, letting the sobs shake my body. If Sam and Dean ever come rescue me, and they find out that I've killed Cas...Winchester or not, they may leave me here to rot. Or they may do the demons a favor and end me themselves. They killed Dean's daughter once. Who is to say that I'm safe from that fate? 

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