I know.

Thirty Eight

"How is it even possible for you to look sexy and innocent at the same time?" Jamie's hand sat gently on my hip, watching as I made myself another drink.

"It's the dress." I turned around to him, flicking my hair over my shoulder. "It's cute right?"

"It is cute." He nodded smiling down at me. "I'm not drinking tonight, in case you change your mind and want me to leave."

"No. Don't do that Zoe, Pip and Dec are staying too. Zoe's staying with me, Pip and Dec are staying in her old room. You can have the spare room. Not mum and dad's but the spare."

"You're sure?"

"Positive. I trust you Jamie. Plus, it's not like you could try anything with Zoe next to me. She would literally snap your neck in a second."

"Yeah I would." Zoe pulled my drink out of my hand, taking a big gulp and instantly regretting it. "That - is not malibu."

"It's Jack and Coke." I laughed, shaking my head at her.

"It's vile. God. Pass me the Tequila." I laughed at her as she made herself a drink, still snarling at my drink like it tried to kill her. "Is this your new playlist?"

"It is indeed." I nodded. "Does it get Zoe's approval?"

"Not enough Taylor on it but I'll take it." She smirked. "Very 'All boys are trash'." I put my hands over Jamie's ears as he chuckled.

"Shh. There's one right here!" He pulled me in front of him.

"Question for you Aurora." Gus grunted, hopping up onto the counter. "Are you ever going to come back to church? Mother requested an answer."

"Short answer. Hell no." Zoe cheered. "If there is a god, I don't want someone who fucks me over the way he continually does. So, fuck him." Pip's face wasn't exactly in agreement with my statements, nor was she onboard with the whole thing but she could see the change in me since she got back. I wasn't the 'yes girl' I was a month ago. A lot of people in town were picking it up as me being rude. Telling Moira that they didn't like the change they were seeing that my parents wouldn't be happy and whatever else. But Moira got it. She said she was happy I wasn't taking people's shit now and whatever it was that stopped me from taking it must have been huge and she hoped I was okay. I was. Other than angry at him. I was okay. Forcing myself to carry on with my life because I knew he was expecting it to stop for me. I wasn't going to give him that benefit. No. My life wasn't grinding to a halt because Mr bigshot thinks he can play me like a doll and I'd stay where he left me, waiting for him to come back.

Maybe that's why I decided to do this tonight. So, if he decided to drop around he'd see it didn't really matter to me. That I'd moved on. He could probably get into the house in this crowd without drawing too much attention to himself. See me laughing and drinking, looking stunning with Jamie back on my waist like we never happened. Like I didn't want this to be him. If he then decided to try again tomorrow, I'd be out all day and lord knows when I'd get back. Probably late. Monday he'd be expecting the bakery to be open so I'd be ahead of him there. I could keep out of sight until lunch and meet Jamie over in Milborough for the afternoon. Then he'd be gone Tuesday without the reconciliation he could be looking for. Without my forgiveness. Without having a chance to say his piece.

"Pip's going though." I nodded at her and Declan. Sweet angels drinking a glass of rose like they were in their late 30s. They'd had their party time at uni. I had not had the pleasure. "Aren't you Piper? Taking over the baton for me."

"I guess so." She huffed. "I don't want to."

"Then tell them no." I shrugged. "I didn't once and look where that got me." I stared at Zoe as my current favourite song came on. "Zoe!"

"I know, I know. I'm coming." She chuckled and I pulled myself out of Jamie's arms leaning up and kissing him, leaving my lipstick across his cheek with a giggle before I dashed out to the living room/ turned dance floor. I very very rarely wore stiletto heels but I figured, at home would be the best place and I wanted the height. This dress was fancy and I wanted to go the whole 9 yards. Drunk Rory had too much confidence for her own good, climbing up onto the coffee table and dragging Zoe up with me. Dancing on a table singing my heart out to Karma with Zoe was always refreshing but with so many people singing along with us, it was a total vibe.

Drunk Rory didn't care that the guys below her were looking up her skirt as she turned around, she didn't care Jamie was red faced in the back of the room being overcome with jealousy again and she didn't care that Griffin was now stood in the doorway with the same expression. I downed the last of my cup, laughing at Zoe as she tried to do the same and suddenly realised she'd made it way too strong. I unclipped my hair, letting it down finally as the Jack took complete hold of me. Jamie started making his way through the crowd, no doubt to help me down, a small smile on his face. He grinned bigger as he got to me and I curled my finger under his chin, scrunching up my nose as the most perfect line played.

"Karma is the guy on the screen coming straight home to me." Zoe's laugh was loud and clear over the music as I continued screaming the lyrics, knowing this would be over soon and Jamie would pull me down, probably tell me I'd had too much, which was definitely true. I'd pout and pretend I don't see him pretending to add some alcohol to my coke. Sure enough, the second the song was over, his hands reached up, opening and closing for me to fall into them. I did, taking the single step into him.

"Having fun up there?" I nodded. "Can we get down off the table before someone breaks an ankle?"

"Aww but I thought a broken ankle might be fun." He pulled me closer to him, lowering me down slowly in his arms. "How very Dirty Dancing of you."

"I'm very aware of all the eyes watching us right now."

"You're talking about the one specific set of eyes that Gus rushed over to?" He nodded and I leaned down, pressing my lips to his, the party breaking into drunken applause. "Don't worry about him."