I know.

Fifteen

"When did you even learn to cook?" I took another bite, landing myself back in the most amazing meal I think I may have ever eaten in my life. I wasn't a huge pasta fan. Like sure it's great but I don't understand the hype to have it for essentially every meal. Once a week was plenty for me. Unless it was this. I could happily eat this chicken pasta every day. Chicken Alfredo he'd called it. Phenomenal. He could stay.

"Mum taught me obviously but when I left for uni I just carried on. You know what mum says-"

"The key to a person's heart is through their stomach." I chuckled, making Griffin smile across the table. "You must have women falling at your feet back in London if this is how you're cooking for them. This is literally the best pasta I've ever eaten."

"Really?"

"Hell yeah. I'm gonna need it shipping up when you leave, just so you're aware."

"After the seasons over I can come make you it whenever."

"When's the season over?"

"Start of July. Starts in 2 weeks." I nodded. "Busiest 3 months of the year so I might not be around much."

"I wasn't expecting you to be at all." I shrugged at him. "Exciting though. I usually avoid everywhere when you're playing. Lock myself in the bakery and do some super intense cleaning. I might let Gus drag me to the pub this year."

"You should come down for a game. I'd love knowing you're there."

"Depends on the day of the week."

"Usually Friday's and Saturday's."

"I could do a Saturday game. Bakery is closed over the weekend unless I've got a specific order so let me know." He chewed his food as we returned into a comfortable silence, music playing in the background so it wasn't awkwardly just us chewing and the scraping of cutlery on the plates.

I think we were getting over that hump of uncertainty on if we could still have a friendship or not. It was an instant comfortability with Fin. Something that never left. It was quiet moments like this when I could look at him and see the Griffin he was back then. Nights like tonight where I was fully convinced I'd dreamed everything up and nothing had ever gone wrong between us. He'd been here forever and we never fell apart. Tonight, was us. It was Rory and Fin. Bickering and screaming and laughing and harsh nicknames and play fighting and throwing things at each other. It was us again and for the first time in years, I felt warm. I felt a genuine sense of happiness that wasn't clouded by my parents or Pip or church or work. It was just us.

"Stay with me when you come down. Don't get a hotel."

"Hm?" He shuffled in his seat.

"I have spare bedrooms. Don't pay for a hotel, they're so expensive. Even if you don't come down for me. If you ever some down for a day trip or concert or whatever. Just let me know. Mum has a spare key."

"That's a sweet offer Fin. Thanks." The silence returned as we looked at each other. His lips tightened a little and relaxed, like he wanted to say something but wasn't sure if he should on not. His brain ticking over. "What yah thinking?"

"Oh, nothing."

"No. I know when Griffin Taylor has dusted off the cogs in his mind. Steams coming out your ears."

"Ha. Ha. So funny." He gave a half-hearted smile. "I was just thinking about how nothing has really changed between us. Sure, we're older and everything but I still feel the same about you as I did before."

"That I'm an annoying, pain in the ass?"

"Well yeah but that's not what I meant." He sighed and tilted his head ever so slightly at me. "What I mean to say Rory, is that the 10 years I haven't had you in my life have been the hardest ever. Not even in the stuff I've had going on. That's all been easy. I just- somethings been missing. None of the friends I've made ever make me laugh like you, I don't feel like I'm home when I came back here until these past few days. I think the anger I had about the whole thing with us clouded how I was actually feeling about not having you in my life."

"And what was that?"

"That I missed you. I missed the biggest years of both of our lives because I was so caught up in my own feelings and being home, seeing you just carrying on when I felt like I was barely coping hurt. Every time I came home it was Gus talking to mum about you and him laughing together like we used to. It was you, him and Zoe taking trips or him coming home drenched after you dumped a load of water on him. I know it's my own fault I missed everything and I could have been enjoying all this with you guys. I know. I just wish I could go back and slap myself for being so caught up in myself to not realise what I was missing." I gave a little sigh, walking around and sliding into the bench beside him, wrapping him into the hug I felt that he needed right now.

"You can't go back in time Fin. That's something I wish I could do too. Just hold back the car by 20 minutes in a hope that it wouldn't have happened. But it did and I couldn't have stopped it if I tried and I can't go back to undo it. Yeah you missed a lot, but there's also so much more that's going to happen. Pip just got married for god's sake. That in itself is going to be a whole thing. You missed us making memories and laughing sure but there's nothing stopping you from being in the next ones. Plus, you made your own right? Winning the cup 3 years straight? Travelling the world with your team mates. That's impressive. So much better than Zoe running into clingfilm across the bedroom door or Gus being covered in sharpie after a nap." He chuckled, hugging me tighter. "Don't beat yourself up over it all Fin. We'll be alright."

"Is that a promise?"

"Yeah." I nodded, sitting up straight and holding out my little finger for him. "I promise that we will be okay. Me and you. Any argument we have, we will find a way to sort it, just like we have here." He nodded looping his finger around mine and pulling it tight.

"You're the best. You know that right?"

"The best what? Napper? I can agree on that. Drinker of wine I'm pretty sure Zoe tops it."