To The Moon And Back [RussAme]

chapter 18

"Your welcome.." Russia said softly as he lays his head on top of America's.
"Y'know I never expected you'd be my best friend, not after grade school.." America said as he begins playing with his fingers.
"Everyone deserves a second chance America.." Russia said with a soft tone that melted America heart, the small American boy so desperately wanted to reach out and hold Russia's hand but fear stopped him.
"Yeah.. your right.." America said as he hesitantly reached his hand over to Russia's and taps his pinky on his thumb showing that he'd like to hold his hand.
Russia jumps and moves his hand away before thinking and as America was moving his hand away Russia swiftly grabs it and holds it in his.
Americas heart heat quickens and he talks quick glances up at Russia, his face was red and he was trying to cover it with is left hand but it still showed. America found an odd satisfaction seeing the big bad Russians soft side, he loved it.
The two set in awkward silence for a while before Russia mustered up a little bit of courage.
"D-do you wanna hangout tomorrow?" Russia asked shyly, America looks up at him with a questionable look before laughing a little bit.
"Sure, where do you want to go?" America asked as he looks down at Russia hand that softly holds his own.
"Um... What about a restaurant?" Russia said looking a bit embarrassed. America smiles before nodding and laying his head back on Russia's shoulder.
"C-can we sit like this for a while.. i-i feel really comfortable." America said as he blushed a little only receiving a soft hum from Russia.
Russia begins to feel really guilty, America has slowly began to trust him and even finds some type of comfort by being around him but Russia couldn't even tell him what happened the night before.
"I-i have to tell you something America.." russia nervously shifts a little as he looks down with a guilty expression.
America quickly noticed the tone of voice that Russia was using and looked up with him with a worried expression.
"S-something happened last night.." Russia begins to speak occasionally glancing at America to read his expression.
America leans forward slightly signaling he was listening.
"Y-you told me something and I don't know if you were drunk or joking but... " Russia said as he glances as America again.
"...go on.." america said as he looks away.
"Y-you told me you were in love with me..." Russia said shyly as he covers his face with his ushanka hat.
America stares at him for a moment before looking away in embarrassment.
"Oh God... Where do I even start.." America said looking away with a guilty expression.
"I-i was drunk.. I didn't lie though if what I remember was correct I did have a crush on you when I was in kindergarten but it went away as I grew older. Don't get me wrong I could possibly fall for you again but right now I'm happy having a best friend.." America said looking away he clearly lied but didn't want to lose Russia when he was just now starting to get used to him.
"O-oh... I should have known!" Russia laughed as he smiles.
'why dose it hurt?'.. Russia thought as he hid his pain with laughing, he hate to admit it but he secretly hoped America did have feelings for him.
America stayed silent for awhile not knowing what to say or how to say it eventually the small American boy fell asleep next to Russia.
Russia finally had enough courage to to say something again.
"Hey uh.. America ca-." Before Russia could finish his sentence he quickly realized that everyone in the room had fallen asleep.
Russia sighs as he gently and slowly picks up America bridal style and carries him to his room, Russia places the small male on his bed and covers him up, not bothering to take his shoes off. Russia then makes his way down stairs but before he could walk down the stairs he could hear USSR and Nazi having a little bit to much run, Russia immediately ran down to Belarus's room and peeked in seeing her asleep he quickly scoops her up walks down the hall past his room and into the guest room. Russia places Belarus in the guest room then grabs a spare blanket and walks down stairs. Once in the living room he places the cover over Canada and Ukraine before walking back upstairs to his room. Russia sighs before grabbing a pair of headphones from a drawer and deciding to play his computer for a few hours.
After about two hours of listening to music Russia sighs as leans back in his hair, he quickly glances back at America to make sure he was still sleeping. America was awake but didn't want to get up he curled into a ball and his back was turned to Russia leaving the taller male to assume he was sleeping.

"I wonder... Do I love him?" Russia said out loud as he groans a little.
"I mean.. He's actually pretty cute.." Russia said again as he lets a small whine.
"God what if Canada is right, if my feelings don't change or stay the same will that really mean im in love?" Russia sighs and gently smacks his face with his hands, he shakes his head.
"No.. don't be so sure Russia. You still don't know him to well.." Russia said with a sigh as he stands up, he pushes his chair under the desk and walks over to the bed and sits on the edge looking at his feet. America could not believe his ears, his face crimson red, he takes slow breath to compose himself it kinda sounds like he's snoring softly.
Russia took notice and smiles softly as he slips into the bed and under the covers.
"I know you can't hear me but if I'm honest I kinda hoped you meant what you said when you were drunk.. I know I'm not sure if my own feelings but.. something wanted to hear that I just maybe had a shot with you.." Russia said pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his chin on them.
America stayed silent not knowing how to address the situation, his heart racing and his mind cloudy as he tried to build up courage to turn and gave the taller male he felt a hand on his back.
"I'm scared to fall for you... Scared of getting hurt or losing you.." Russia said rubbing his back, America lets out a soft groan and Russia jumps.
The taller male watches for movement all America did was shift nervously.
"But... At the same time your company makes me feel.. at ease?" Russia said finally becoming silent at that moment America let a whine slip as he curls into himself further. Russia looks up at him, hesitantly he scoots closer and pulls America close.
"I-im.. I'm here it's okay.." Russia said as he nuzzles into Americas neck, he hums softly, something that makes heat rise to Americas face as he feels his lips gently brush his neck.
But yet America felt so at ease in his arms that the drowsy ness flooded in and within minutes americas was silently snoring in the taller males arms.
Hours later America woke to an voice, not knowing what's happening he turns to feel arms around him.
"Mm.. Russia?" America yawns turning over and looking up to see Russia now staring down at him with a bright blush on his face.
Russia gulps and smiles awkwardly.
"S-Sorry.. I didn't want to move because I was scared of waking you up.." Russia said as he looks away slightly, America laughs and leans his head against the taller male.
"Don't worry! I actually don't mind your company. I feel pretty comfortable around you." America said now burying his face into Russia's chest as he sighs.