TRIGUN STAMPEDE (Trigun) Oneshots and Headcannons.

'Sometimes, Even to Live is an Act of Courage'

A/n: @Bumble_Bee0123 (The '@' situation is being weird still) I focused on making this because; this is an important topic. SH is hard, and I believe that you can make it through it, I hope this can help you a little bit.. but yea. All other requests will be out soon dw. ;)

Tw: Mentions of self-harm, sad topics

The night was calm and silent. There wasn't any commotion going on around the town. You were finally able to be alone in the little comfort that the small room you were staying in for the night. The small and old clock that resided next to your bed ticked agonizingly loudly as you lay there, staring at the bland ceiling. You weren't awake for any particular reason. Sleep was being selfish and decided to skip out on you for the night. 

A sigh left your lips as you repositioned yourself on the bed laying on your side while looking out the window. The moon shone brightly through the glass window. The orb of the night was somehow able to light up the small room so brightly for being so small.  

Your mind began to wander to other thoughts as you lay on the not-so-comfortable bed and looked out the foggy window. Scanning through your memories, your brain decided to land on ones you're not too fond of. The memories tended to play on repeat in your mind, still haunting you, no matter how far you bury them. They were still there.. and always would be. It pained you as each one played so vividly in your mind. 

Through the midst of all this, your knees somehow found themselves pressed against your chest, and the blankets brought up closer to your face to try to shield you. You squeezed your knees tightly for comfort as you tried to clear your mind and think of other memories. Some like the ones of Vash and the gang. Ever since you had met them, you had found yourself happier. The way that you all survived life or death situations, the stories, the laughter, and even the gravest of times, the memories were pleasant. 

You found yourself smiling at the thought, but only for a moment. No matter how hard you tried, the terrible thoughts persisted. They were like a curse, always following you, and taking hold of you at the worst times. As you pulled the blankets closer towards you, your hand brushed against your warm face, feeling the wet tears you didn't know you began to shed. A sniffle left your lips as you sighed and wiped your tears. 

With your mind wandering again through the memories, the only solution you could think of at the moment was to go back to your old ways. Your eyes wandered toward your bag as if it called to you. Maybe it will help? It could help to relive the memories for a bit.. You had an internal conflict with yourself. When you met the gang a while back, you decided it was time to stop, but.. it was too much to bare right now.. 

Letting your negative thoughts win, you pulled off the blankets you had pulled up oh so close to you before. Your feet touched the cold floor as you made your way to your bag, while wiping the flowing tears from your face. Instinctively, your hands unzipped the small hidden pouch in your bag as you pulled out the small razor blade. The blade was cold to the touch as your shaky hands held it tightly. 

You tried to fight back the thoughts, but it was too compelling, it could help. Taking a shaky breath, you placed the blade on your wrist, not pushing too hard. Well.. here goes nothing.. you thought. Taking a breath, you were interrupted by the door opening and Vash peeking inside. Your eyes opened wide as he stared at you in shock. 

"Y/n.. what are you doing..?" He said walking through the door and shutting it behind him. 

Hiding the blade behind you're back, you were barely able to squeak out, "Vash! I uh-" You were flustered and scared that he had caught you. 

He walked closer to you, hesitantly placing his hands on your shoulders. His touch was light and comforting as he studied you carefully. As words were finally able to form, you looked up at his worried eyes, but something inside of you came crashing down and your words got caught in your throat. Your face contorted from shock to sadness so fast, it took Vash by surprise. You found yourself being drawn towards Vash as you wrapped your arms around him.