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— I WAS COMPLETELYUNLOVABLE
That is what I had been told my entire life. Everybody that I had ever loved or cherished had always left, telling me those same words. At this point, I was numb to the feeling it once gave me when hearing it. I had heard it so many times that I didn't even recognise them as anything negative or hateful. I had never been the one to leave somebody, even when they were struggling. I always gave them the benefit of the doubt, even if they hurt me more times than I could count.
The unfortunate part is that even when I stayed through thick and thin, If I did something that may have stung them a bit, they would leave immediately. It was a feeling of betrayal that I was familiar with.
It gave me not just trust issues, but trouble loving people the way that I used to. When I was a kid, I cherished anybody that I enjoyed being around. Most people found it annoying, but being as young and naive as I was, I never stopped since they never gave me a good enough reason too. If I had to deal with younger me now, I'd be annoyed with it too honestly.
Even so, I don't regret being the way I was. Not because I don't believe I was annoying, I definitely was. It was because it gave me experiences and lessons to bounce off of. I could now easily depict good friends from bad and adapt to lonely moments that I endured.
It had been a week since I last saw Dally, since I broke up with him. I hadn't seen him around anywhere, not even at Bucks. It was as if he had disappeared, like mist on a hot summer day.
