alone | colby brock x y/n

"About last night..."

-Y/n's pov-

Usually I wake up and stare at the ceiling, having a conversation or two. Most of the time it is scolding me that I shouldn't have done something or praising me for my achievements. It looks out for me and guides me through life. The ceiling is like my subconscious.

The ceiling that shines through my darkest nights often asks me about my crush from second grade or the girl I used to call my best friend. The ceiling asks me if I will ever love someone as deeply and purely as I loved my first boyfriend. He's long gone from being a part of my life and I don't think of him as often anymore, but I once talked to my ceiling about him. The ceiling never forgets and the ceiling never lets go... it has a memory of its own and if I tell my ceiling about you it means your existence is important to me.

That day I woke up and my adviser was looking back at me. I was laying still and my breathing was even. It was asking me about you... "Who is this boy?... What are you doing in his bed?... Do you like him?" the ceiling asked me eagerly about Colby as I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes.

"This is Colby and he is my friend!" I talked back to the ceiling. Friend... What a wonderful word... He's been exposed to my vulnerability, to my tears, to my laughs and to my different worlds. He was here for all of it and I respect him for being like that... for being real.

I then turned my head to my side to find Colby peacefully sleeping next to me. I still remember his dark hair being all messy and he was also snoring a little bit. I looked at him and I glanced back to the ceiling for a moment. It was time to wake up, I told myself as I got up and looked around Colby's room. I was searching around trying to catch glimpses of the previous night or maybe see something to make me feel the way I felt when I was talking to him... understood, full, real.

My eyes travelled down to my arms, my fingers, my wrist, my pain. I frowned looking at my left hand because it bloomed like lavender in May. It was now a deep purple and slightly swollen but I could do nothing about it.

That day I left before I could say my goodbyes to anyone as a result of everyone being asleep.

Well not exactly everyone... Nate was awake and he offered me a ride home. That day I had courses before lunchtime and afternoon so I happily accepted and hopped in his car.

I remember fastening my seatbelt and looking back at Sam and Colby's house feeling bad for leaving so early. In that moment I decided to do something that ended up leading me into a whole new chapter of my life... with new experiences and new people. I was going to surround myself with new priorities and goals. What I didn't know back then is that it doesn't only go up.. while downs were going to be rock bottom, the ups were going to be like touching heaven with my fingertips.

I texted Colby.

"Good morning Colby! Last night was amazing and I'm deeply sorry I wasn't able to say goodbye in person. I have class at noon and I need to get ready."

I looked down and realised I still had his sweats on. My eyes moved back to the screen.

"I just realised that I'm still wearing your sweats lol" I sent the message and I thought for a second about a good way to seal off the whole thing.

"We should hang out again!" I typed.

My eyes travelled to the road as I placed my phone back on my lap, along with my jeans. My mind was going hundreds of miles per hour and my eyes were getting lost on the road.
Nate suddenly spoke up.

"So how's the hand?"

"Oh... it's purple I guess..." I was in a funny mood.

"God.. last night I was really thinking about various ways to deal with this guy." I hoped he was joking. I fakely laughed and rolled my eyes.

"Come on, let's not choose violence." I spoke in a peaceful voice acting like I was calming the waters down.

"But seriously talking now, if something like that happens again we will have to do something about it." He was being serious, looking me dead in the eye. "The guys have taken a liking to you... especially Colby." He continued with a straight face and eyes on the road. That last phrase shocked me and I remained silent, not finding words to even change the subject.

The rest of the drive remained silent, getting swept away by thoughts.

-Colby's pov-

My sun kissed face scrunched up as my eyes couldn't bare the beaming light  anymore. By now I could feel the waves of heat coming into my room through the open window.

"Why must LA be so god damn hot..." I thought to myself as my eyes fluttered open.The coolness that comes with the rain didn't last for as long as I would have expected it to. I was met with an empty bed, empty room. I searched with my eyes around the room looking for her but she was clearly gone. I opened the door to the bathroom hoping she was there washing her face with cold water, but the room was empty. I sighted and walked towards the window to draw the curtains.

⟡

My feet met the stairs as I made my way to the living room. Sam, Izzy and Nate were awake and hanging.

"Morning guys. Where's Y/n?" I asked stopping in the doorway. My hair was messy and my eyes were dull. Izzy's smile grew on her face while I was talking, I couldn't help but notice.

"You missed her. I took her back to the dorms about an hour ago. She had class at..." he explained, then stopped to look at his watch.

"Right now actually!" He continued.

"Ah I see..." I said as I turned around. "Later you guys!" and just like that I exited the room silently.

As I was making my way up the stairs I had only one thought in my mind. Diary. I wanted so badly to write in my diary about all the events, emotions, talks Y/n and I had the previous night. So that's what I did.

Dear diary,
I think something wrong is happening. I met this girl and she's intriguing, to say the least.
She's not selfish, she actually wants to get to know me, the real me. I remember clearly how she fell asleep on my shoulder while we were watching a movie. The ashtray on the table, the open window and the pouring rain. She looked so peaceful, I didn't have the heart in me to wake her up. Her hair smelled like coconut and vanilla and brushed her face softly. Her jeans were tossed across the room, lying on the floor. I couldn't entirely focus on the movie after she fell asleep leaning on me.

Now I desire someone's attention more than I have ever wanted it before. I don't know what to do, but I'll keep on enjoying these little moments. Try not to break something that doesn't need any fixing.

Maybe it will turn into something more, maybe it will not. All I know for now is that I'd rather be with her than a bunch of other people I know. She's 19 though. She's innocently sleeping in my clothes. I don't think she deserves someone like me.

-Cole.

a/n

sorry for the short chapter. hope you enjoy and thank you very much for voting. btw I'm deeply sorry if there's any grammar mistakes or language errors, I'm trying my best since it's not my first language. hope you enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.