Healing (KTH, featuring KNJ)

Chapter 69

Clara was between Taehyung's legs, leaning back on his chest while his hands caressed her belly. Tonight they were reminded of something they both wanted to forget, that Taehyung would have to leave for an Asia tour shortly, and then when the twins were barely a month and a half old he'd be leaving for a longer world tour. They both already felt like they didn't get to spend enough time together. This idea of a longer separation when they were a new family was too heartbreaking to even consider. Taehyung had always loved his job and touring was a special highlight. But for the first time he was filled with dread at the idea of touring the major capitals of the world. The only saving grace was there was a convenient break between the two segments of the tour, so he'd be home when Clara gave birth.

Taehyung was making Clara giggle by finding the most tickling spots on her neck and repeatedly nosing them in an effort to make her laugh. When Clara finally had enough of his antics she turned around and straddled him, preparing to lean forward in her favorite position allowing her back to stretch out and relax.

"It's hard to imagine that I still have so long to go. I feel like I'm already huge, can I really get that much bigger?"

"Yes you can, and you will. And you'll look even more beautiful as a result." Taehyung rubbed her back, comforting her aching muscles.

"Taehyung, have you thought of what you'd like to name the boys?"

"I don't know. I wasn't sure if you'd prefer Korean names or American names and I wanted to talk about that first. Is it something you've considered?"

"I think maybe Korean names. We'll probably live here the rest of our lives and our kids will already stand out enough with your career. I think it would be better for them to have normal Korean names."

"Whatever you want, baby girl. If you'd like Korean names then that is what we'll choose. Do you have anything in mind?"

"What if we named them after your band mates? I like the name Yoongi."

"No." Taehyung didn't hesitate in his response which made Clara laugh. She knew Taehyung would say no, and she just wanted to rile him up a bit.

"What about Jungkook? Or Hoseok?" Clara was laughing now.

"Still no."

Taehyung kissed her temple. "Let's take some time to think about it. We've got plenty of time. Just know that it doesn't matter what the boys' actual names are, I'm just going to call them little tiger and little cub. Does that work for you?"

"Ok" Clara smiled at him. If there was one thing she never worried about, it was Taehyung being a loving and engaged father. It almost made her squeal just thinking about how sweet he could be.

"Good, but know this. You are the only one who will ever be my baby girl. We could have ten little girls and I would never call any of them that, because it is exclusively reserved for you, my perfect wife."

Clara blushed and hid her face in his chest. She absolutely loved that nickname but it still made her warm with both excitement and embarrassment.

"Alright baby girl, let's get off to the shower so I can wash you up. In the meantime I'll show you what a good daddy I can be when it comes to taking care of my baby."

Clara squeaked and hid herself further into Taehyung's chest causing him to laugh.

"Off we go, time to get washed up so we can finish our Korean drama before you fall asleep on me again."

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Over the next several weeks they moved back to their apartment so they could have more privacy again. Clara was doing well enough to be alone during the daytime and her return to therapy seemed to be helping rebuild her confidence. She even came over to the company once to visit the boys during their lunch break. She felt more than a little awkward being the center of attention there, but Namjoon and Taehyung made sure they stayed by her side so they could ward off anyone who might make her feel uncomfortable.

By now Clara had become even larger, carrying the weight of her large belly felt like it was constantly throwing her off balance. Taehyung was always looking for little ways to make her feel more comfortable. He arranged for a masseuse trained in pregnancy massage to visit twice a week and he had an individual instructor come to the apartment three times a week to help Clara with her yoga. He knew that sometimes the two women went for a walk in the park as part of her yoga exercise, but it didn't bother him at all. If Clara was comfortable and confident, he was happy.

Overall he felt a bit conflicted. He loved seeing Clara pregnant, she was absolutely glowing with beauty. But at the same time he knew it was hard on her body and she was increasingly achy. He hated to see her suffer in any way. But she was always so quiet and calm, never seeming bothered by the situation. So Taehyung trusted her to tell him if she needed anything.

Taehyung had talked to the company, and they had expanded the circle even wider of who was in the know about Clara. During those conversations the thing that struck Taehyung the most was when they assured him that even if Clara's identity was revealed they would still allow her more freedom than it seemed she had now. Taehyung really had taken advantage of the fact that Clara didn't mind staying home, realizing only now that her life had essentially become a prison between very small walls. He didn't want to force her to go out more, but he certainly was going to do what he could to make her feel that was always an option.

Each day Clara seemed to be recovering, but the problem was that each day also brought them closer to the day Taehyung needed to leave for his tour. Nobody wanted to see him go even for a few weeks, but even more concerning was they were getting increasingly closer to the tour of Europe and the Americas. And while they all know Clara and the boys would be ok without him, it felt hard to imagine them fully thriving. And all Taehyung wanted in life was to see them flourish, even if he was able to be there.