Genre: Romance
Remember those times when you would call me at night and spend the whole conversation nagging how insensitive your girl was? Those days when you would just appear in my doorsteps and cry on my shoulders just to let out of the loneliness you were feeling inside. Those weeks that you would often stay at my pad, talk and laugh with me on those crazy movies we used to watch, stay late when I was being pestered by my insomnia and even get drunk whenever I insist that I have to drink and take a swig.
Those were the moments that I thought you were mine. But I was wrong.
Because for you, I was just the girl you could turn to whenever you needed someone who could join you on your lonely days. I was just the girl who could put a smile on your face when all she did to you was to let your tears fall. I was just a friend for you, I was never the girl who warmed your heart nor made it beat like crazy.
But for me, I was way different. I was the girl who would promise to love you no matter what state you were at. I was the girl who was all too willing to give you a hug even if you stink when you get drunk. I was the girl who would cry whenever you felt so alone because I knew in myself that I would always be at your side. I was the girl who would never leave you.
But you never saw me.
One day, you came at my house holding a bouquet of flowers, whispered words of love and promised things I never thought I would ever hear from you. That day was the happiest day of my life because after years of hardships, you finally noticed me as a girl and not just your full-pledged friend. I finally believed that dreams do come true. My dreams would no longer be reveries because they were already my reality.
And so I thought, maybe this was it. Maybe, this was the chance to love and be loved in return. Now, I could finally shout to the world that you love me too. But I was wrong, such a fool to believe. Because it wasn't a third party that pushed us to break apart. It was you and that Goddamn stupid disease you have. You chose to let me believe in your lies. You chose to break my heart just to hide that you're slowly dying inside.
Was I really a fool?
Now, look at me, Lee. Look at how devastated I am. Look at how your death broke me. Look at how those memories haunt me. Look at how different it could have been if you're here.
I stared at the withered petals of the red rose you gave me the day you died. You told me it's not going to be the last flower you'd give me. Now what, Lee? What would you do now? The flower you gave me was now withering, don't I deserve a fresh one from you?
Abrupt tears flow from my eyes at the thought that I would no longer receive any flowers from you. Suddenly, an idea came in my mind. I stood up from my bed, walked in front of the mirror, stared at my reflection and realized that I was really fucked up. I smiled awkwardly.
Yes, this would be the last time I'd be like this.
I heavily breathed before heading to the balcony that I'd never been into since the day you died. I welcomed the warm rays of the sun with a bitter smile. We used to spend our mornings here, we used to laugh and talk about anything while staying here in this balcony. But this would be the last time I'd be standing here. Without a doubt, I hastily stepped on the railings of the balcony and smiled again. But before I could do my last routine, I saw a flower pot placed on the railings. And there, I knew it was from you. I picked the red rose that grew from the pot and smelled the poignant scent the rose beholds. Tears began flowing from my eyes again.
"See you, Lee. I'll see you now," I mouthed as I jumped off the balcony. My room was in the tenth floor, surely, I would see you finally.
