Summer of Jonnor

Self-Inflicted Punishments

"Yeah, we're all good now." He smiled to himself.

"I noticed the door was closed, were you talking stuff out with him?"

Jude tilt-nodded his head a little. "Yeah, something like that."

"Good," she said. "Oh, you're coming with me to the center today."

He gave her a confused look. "I am? I'm grounded, you know."

"Yeah, well this is community service and Stef and Lena think you should be doing stuff like that rather than being holed up in your room texting Connor. And don't look happy, the first thing I'm having you do is clean the bathroom."

***

Jude had just finished up in the bathroom when his phone buzzed. It was Connor on KiK. Out of meeting. Dad taking me to Bay West.

Jude replied. Enjoy ur delicious lunch.

Won't taste as good as you do. :) 

Jude laughed to himself. He sent back, ;) and slipped the phone back into his pocket. He went and found Callie. "I'm done with the bathroom. Now what?"

"Well, we have a couple of new referrals and I thought you might want to meet them, they are both going to Anchor Beach next year and will be in your grade. Myranda identifies as a lesbian and Kyle is bisexual, so you might have some stuff in common with them."

"You do realize that someone's sexual orientation has nothing at all do with what makes us common to each other, right?" Jude asked.

Callie frowned. "Oh, well, I didn't mean it that way—I just thought they would be supportive of you and Connor."

"And being LGBT isn't a prerequisite for supporting someone who is," Jude added. "Maybe you should just stop trying here. I'll go say hi to them." Jude went over to where Myranda and Kyle were sitting. "Hey," he said. "I'm Jude."

Myranda offered her hand. "Myranda." They shook. She was a short, slightly overweight girl with bleached blond hair and black-rimmed glasses.

Jude offered his to Kyle and they shook. Kyle was brown-haired, blue-eyed and also had black glasses, but rimless.

"So," Myranda asked, as Jude sat down next to them, "why are you here, Jude?"

"Oh," he said. "I uh, stole a yacht."

Her eyes went big. "Wow, I've only stolen clothes and I thought that was illicit."

Kyle nodded. "I've only stolen food. Before I went to my mom's. Why'd you steal it?"

"Long story," Jude said. "I was trying to find someone."

"Did you do time?" Myranda asked. 

"No, the boat owner's actually glad I did it, I got him out of trouble while I was getting myself into trouble. I guess you could call it self-inflicted punishment. I got myself grounded, and my moms thought I should do some community service here with my sister Callie."

"Moms?" Myranda asked.

"Yeah, they are a married lesbian couple. They adopted me last year, and Callie just a short time ago."

"Cool. Any other brothers and sisters?"

"Yeah, Mariana is my other sister, and I have two brothers, they are both away right now. Brandon is at Idyllwild studying music stuff and Jesus is at boarding school in Colorado."

"I have a brother who's much more perfect than I am," Kyle said, "and he's my parents' favorite."

Jude bobbed his head. "I was never the favorite either when I was in the foster system."

"So," Myranda said. "Kyle and I were just gonna go for a little walk. Wanna come with us?"

"Lemme ask Callie if that's ok," Jude said. Myranda and Kyle waited while Jude went over and chatted with Callie, then came back. "She said it's fine if we don't go far."

"Not far at all," Myranda promised. They walked outside, into some nearby trees. Myranda pulled a joint and a lighter out of her pocket. "You're not going to narc on us, are you Jude?"

Jude didn't look very comfortable. "No."

Myranda took a draw and handed the blunt to Kyle who did the same. He offered it to Jude who declined. Kyle shrugged and passed it back to Myranda. Kyle took his hoodie off. "It's hot out here." He smiled at Jude's open-mouthed gaping. "I guess you've never seen a cutter before?"

"Uh no, not like that," Jude said. "You look like a slasher film dude."

"It was mostly in one day," Kyle said. He took another hit off the joint.

"Self-inflicted punishment?" Jude asked.

"Not exactly," Myranda said to him. "It's a form of relief. You see, the sympathetic nervous system is able to chemically dull physical pain. But emotional pain activates the same brain regions and the chemicals don't work for that. That's what makes it unbearable. The cutting activates those chemicals. At least, that's how it was explained to me by my therapist."

Jude nodded, and bit his lip as he found himself unable to tear his eyes away from Kyle's scars.