A Starting Point

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO - FLAMMABLE

Heloyse

— Your grandfather's attitude... Wallace's, it was beautiful.
“At first it was all so difficult. I relate and everything.
Will let go of my hand and headed for the kitchen. He returned with two glasses and a bottle of wine. After we each had a glass in hand, we were silent for a while.
I was processing every word he said. It pained me to know that children at that very moment were going through the same situation that Will went through in childhood. So many adults who, like him, grew up traumatized.
My God, how could I complain so much about my life? I had a happy childhood. And I know that my parents and Marcus died loving me. But with Will it was different. It was so cruel.
I loved him! I loved him so much! I couldn't deny it. Too bad I couldn't take away that pain he felt.
- I imagine. Unfortunately, abusive relationships don't just interfere with the couple's life. Everyone involved suffers together.
— My mother cried every night. I never understood why she didn't leave. I know that she was alone and that she was afraid of not being able to support me. But if she had tried... I know we could be together now and I wouldn't be so bitter.
I took his hand and stroked it gently as he looked into the fire.
"I'm afraid to be like him." I don't know how to have a relationship. I never had. What if I'm like him? Who can say I'm not?
- Just the fact that you loved your mother too much makes you different from him.
He nodded.
“Tell me about yourself, sunshine.
And I spoke.
I shared my plans, the loss of my family and my relationship with Michael. I talked about the lonely days I spent and how I ended up in Clearwater.
Will listened intently to every word. There were moments when he squeezed my hand, as if to say "I'm sorry". The hours went by and we kept venting. I had never felt like talking about my life like I did at that moment. It was also something new for him, something he had never experienced.
- You love him?
His question took me by surprise.
- Not. No longer.
Will turned his gaze to the flame in the hearth and then filled his goblet with wine. He took a short sip and set the glass on the floor, off the mat.
"Want another glass of wine?"
"I do," I replied. "You don't mind a drink?" I mean, you had a horrible experience...
“I know how to drink socially. Bad people use alcohol as an excuse to show what they really are. There are alcoholics who are good despite everything, but there are some who hide what they are behind a bottle.
After serving me, Will drank his wine. I saw his abdomen rise and fall in controlled breaths. He caught me watching him.
— This wine is very good. Is it from your cellar? - disguised.
He did not answer me. At least, not about wine.
“I spoke to Mary.
I drank all the wine that was inside the glass. I needed it.
“I ended what she thought we had.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you..." I repeated mentally.
Will, still seated, walked over to me and placed his hands over my face. My whole body tingled with his touch.
"I want to be with you every moment." Since the day I saw you, I want to be with you. From the time I wake up until the time I go to sleep and when I dream, it's about you. You are in everything I see.
Will brought his lips together slowly. When they pressed against mine, I let out a small moan.
“Will? — I cut him off.
- What?
"You feel the same way I do, don't you?" I took her hand and placed it between my breasts. “You make my heart skip a beat.
Will didn't answer me and started a slow kiss. It was a kiss unlike any he'd ever given me. This one was calm, patient, loving.
I lay down on the rug and he did the same. I felt his hard abdomen press against me and his clean scent entered my nostrils.
I closed my eyes with desire building inside me as he explored my mouth. I felt his heavy breathing on my neck and his kisses being deposited in that area. One of his hands roamed free over my body. His mouth craved me as much as I him. His kiss intensified and our moans seemed like a request for release. Will broke our kiss and let out a long breath.
- What's it?
I furrowed my brow and waited.
Will closed his eyes for a second as if he was fighting a battle within himself. Then he opened them.
— I don't know how, Heloyse... I didn't know it was like this... I didn't... I never knew it was like this. But I know what it's like to have a broken heart. I know why...
I waited and his words didn't come. I felt a twinge of disappointment. For a moment I thought he was going to say he was in love with me.
By the time Will kissed me again, I wasn't thinking about anything else.
There were kisses, hands and moans. It was love what we felt, even though he didn't say he loved me.
Soon, our clothes were no longer preventing us from feeling ourselves. There were no more barriers. It was just us. Naked, both the bodies and our hearts.
— I think I'm so cold and when I'm inside you, I warm up. You warm everything in me, Heloyse. He resumed kissing and stopped again.
— There is no place in the world that is as perfect as here. Because it's only perfect when you're in it.
"Oh, Will.”
He kissed my chin, then moved down to my neck. His hands roaming over my breasts, my belly and my legs. I felt him touch where that pain point was concentrated. Delicious pain.
He started down, leaving a trail of kisses where his hands roamed. He returned to my breasts again, alternating between sucking and biting.
— Will...
"Let me love you."
"Love?"
Did he realize what he'd said?
I closed my eyes and arched my back as his mouth descended and his tongue circled my navel, moving down a little further. Her mouth moved with greed, desire, lust. And when he moved closer to my thighs, the hot air from his breath sent waves of heat rushing through my entire body.
He touched me there, like fire touched a candle, sweeping away my sanity, turning it to ash. Will was an avid lover. He knew how to make a woman moan, masterfully.
His tongue worked around that sensitive bud, over and over again. When she returned to my lips, she kissed me hard, desperately.
I was more than ready for him.
- Please...
I felt him claiming me hard, slowly, as he had his mouth open, panting.
"Do you feel how damn good this is?"
Yes yes...
Traveling across millions of galaxies... That's how he made me feel.
Small beads of sweat formed on his face.
He withdrew from me and just as quickly, turned me around.
I gasped.
Now, I felt his firm abdomen against my back. Will picked up two pillows from the sofa, making a pile under my belly. His hands tangled in my hair, pulling my head back. My hips lifted slightly, when in one hard thrust, Will penetrated me.
I closed my eyes when I felt it. Will was a big man in every way.
I moved my body, wanting him to move. He pressed his lips to my ear and whispered:
“Take your time, dear. I intend to do this all night.
I squirmed when his voice sent a good feeling through my private parts. I pressed myself against him and frustration took over when what I wanted most was his lips, but I didn't have them. I felt his tongue run down my neck as he pressed himself to me. I gripped the edge of the rug as hard as I could.
I turned my head to the side and then his mouth sought mine. A rough kiss. Rude and deep. That's how he kissed me. I was intoxicated with pleasure and we had barely begun.
Now I understand why women threw themselves at his feet. Will knew what he did. He was trained in that area.
An outstanding professional.
"Move with me, Lisy!"
The solid skin of his abdomen rose and fell, igniting me, setting me on fire. Not even the fire in the fireplace could burn us like that. We were embers over wood. Our skins, when they touched, were combustible.
Flammable skins.
One of his hands was resting on the rug, supporting his body, the other was pulling my hair, making me press closer to him. That's how he dominated me.
Will was so primitive.
I felt the first signs. Yes, I felt my body wanting to break free.
Just when I thought it would take a little longer, Will set me on fire.
"Tell me, darling, how to stop this between us?"
"I don't know..." I answered with difficulty.
— There's no way, Heloyse, this will never stop. Because that's the way it has to be,” he whispered in my ear. “We were made for this. We are one, the other.
And then I exploded into a thousand pieces under him. I screamed. I screamed for him.
Will groaned, throwing his head back as he thrust deep. He moved a few more times and then, I felt his body convulse, on top of me.
With his hands still on the rug so he wouldn't hurt me with his weight, Will put his head on my neck. He placed kisses there and just the fact that his warm breath touched my skin, the embers started to glow.
He withdrew, threw the pillows away and turned me around.
"Are you sure you're on your guard?" Not that we have any disease, but I talk about pregnancy. If you want, I can use a condom next time.
- I'm! — I lied.
After our first time, I was so worried about everything going on that I forgot to buy pills. Anyway, I preferred not to say. Will certainly didn't want a child and we were a mess. We didn't even have an official relationship.
Well, I didn't care. I would have a part of him inside me if I had to. I would carry him and bring that part of him into my life. I didn't care about the consequences.
He smiled in relief and kissed me.
"Then I don't need to tell you what a long night it will be, do you, miss?"
"I don't doubt it will be."
And so, Will loved me, again.

***

When I woke up in the morning, it took a few seconds for my eyes to adjust to the light.
We slept on the rug in the living room, next to the fireplace. Will had fetched a blanket and set up pillows to make us comfortable. When it was time to go upstairs to sleep, neither of us wanted to part, so we stayed there. And as soft as the rug was, my spine felt like it had been hit by a truck.
Will's arm was over me and I could feel his calm breathing. The heat was already getting unbearable, so I moved slowly so as not to wake him.
But as soon as I was up and dressed, he woke up.
My God, he was such a beautiful thing to behold.
Will was on his side, with the blanket covering him from the waist down. The “v” below his navel, he was exposed and his long, messy hair fell over his face. He tucked them behind his ear and smiled at me.
“A thousand times hot”, I thought.
I returned the smile and ran to the bathroom to do my hygiene. Half an hour later, I came downstairs barefoot and wearing a simple dress that I had stuck in my backpack.
He was shirtless and under shorts. Will in shorts was fantastically good to see.
The smell of scrambled eggs and bacon filled the room.
- Hey!
- Hey! The smell is good.
— I asked Alonso, the caretaker, to bring some eggs. He also brought coffee.
- Thanks. That's really good.
Will poured coffee into a cup, setting it in front of me, then served me eggs and bacon.
Despite everything, I knew something wasn't right.
Will wouldn't look at me and I started to get worried.
"Will...?"
“Lisy, I need you to listen to me.
I nodded and stayed silent waiting for him to continue. He sat in a chair across from me and after a while, he looked at me.
- About yesterday...
"Will, please...
- Listen me. Let me finish, please! He waited for me to agree and continued. — About yesterday... About what I said... I want you to know that everything I said wasn't for the moment. I really meant it. I never... I never talked to anybody about that. Not until I met her. he said with a brief smile.
“That's good, I guess.
I watched as he relaxed.
— I wish I could ask her on a date, romantically like any other guy would, but I can't. I don't have the slightest idea how to do this. I've never done. I'm a terrible guy who has no idea how to be romantic. If your parents were alive, they wouldn't approve of me.' He laughed a little sadly.
“It wouldn't be like that. But if you were, I'm sure you'd show what a wonderful man you are. And you don't have to ask me on a date. Just tell me you want me around and I'll stay.
Will got up and I did the same. When we were facing each other, he leaned his head against mine.
- I want to. Very! I've never walked that path.
“I'll walk with you, Will. Ever.
He smiled and hugged me.
— I was just thinking... What do boyfriends do to please a woman like you?
"So you're asking me on a date?"
"Well... Let's just say that's how things work, isn't it?"
I smiled and squeezed him into my hug.
“Usually the guy gives flowers and chocolates. He takes the girl for a walk, to the movies to watch romantic movies, they go hand in hand, they buy T-shirts with phrases that complete each other and with drawings of hearts... — I said as we sat down at the table.
"I think my stomach will survive." Where can I find these t-shirts? she asked feigning seriousness.
I laughed out loud.
Seconds later, we were smiling at each other, sipping our coffee.
The afternoon passed so quickly that we didn't even notice. I was leaning against the railing on the deck, looking out over the river. The silence was absurdly wonderful. The leaves on the trees moved in a slow dance with the wind.
The sun would go down and soon, night would come.
Will joined me and wrapped me in his arms.
"We haven't opened the room yet."
"No." I couldn't disguise my shy answer.
"Come on, let's go get something to eat," he said, pulling my hand.
"You're going to make me fat," I said, smiling.
We sat at the table, ate and watched a movie on TV. Outside, night was falling.
Tomorrow, we would go home. I was afraid. Afraid that I might wake up from this dream. Or even that he would go back to being the distant Will I knew.
However, while I was there I would not think about it anymore. I would forget my worries that night. I wanted to feel her arms one more time.