Destructing The Flame's Deception

Chapter 38

Chapter 38

I stared blankly at the book flight I was holding. It was already tomorrow at exactly 9 a.m. Tumupad si Kuya Alas sa deal naming dalawa na kapag naka-alaala na si Silas, aalis at aalis ako upang pumunta sa ibang bansa.

Kapag naka-alaala na si Silas? When in fact, he faked everything.

He played with me while I was trying to play with the fire.

Once again, he fooled me.

We fooled each other.

Parehas kaming niloko ang isa't isa, pero mas matimbang ang panlolokong ginawa niya sa akin.

I sighed heavily. Buo na ang desisyon ko. Aalis na ako sa bansang ito. I will flew off states and start a new life again. Walang Silas. Walang showbiz. Tanging ako lang, kung saan alam kong tahimik at magiging payapa ang buhay ko.

I won't quit showbiz. Let's just say that I'm gonna be on hiatus. I don't know when I'm going to go back again. I can't say because I don't hold the future. I don't know when I'm going to be okay again.

Because the truth is, I never feel fine after I saw him again and after discovering the truth.

Silas didn't cheat to me, but he still let me think that he cheated on me. In short, he already knew it yet he still let it slide on.

Why? Because he wanted to hurt me just because he thought we were siblings?

On the other hand, I understand Tiana because she doesn't want other people to know about what really happened to her.

Pumikit ako nang mariin at napasapo sa noo ko.

Wrong time but right person.

We fell in love with each other at the wrong time and at the wrong place, but I know that he was the right person— but… destiny was not with us.

I have loved Silas. What I felt for him before was unconditionally, that even though I thought we were siblings, I am still willingly to turn down the world just to be with him. Even though I thought that he cheated on me, I am still willing to forgive him.

I laughed playfully while thinking those thoughts. Siya kaya, ganoon ang nararamdaman sa akin?

When it comes to love, no matter how you both love each other, if the world is your enemy… then we don't have a choice but to fight against the world. But fighting along with the world only gives us a 50% chance of winning.

And in our battle with the world, we both lose.

I stared at the citylights from my window. I was already preparing for my flight tomorrow night. I still have a lot of agenda for tomorrow, especially that I'm gonna be on hiatus from my career.

At isa pa… marami din akong balak puntahan bukas, at isa na roon si Tiana.

I want to talk to her. I want to say how I feel sorry for her. But on the other hand, I don't want her to remember her past that's why I can't decide if I'm going to talk to her.

The last time I talked to Silas was the time he kneeled in front of me, asking for forgiveness that I couldn't give for him.

Sa kabila ng mga nagawa niya sa akin, hindi ko na alam kung paano pa siya patatawarin.

Kahit na pinaliwanag na niya ang lahat sa akin, still… the damage has been done and his sorry were too late. Nasaktan na ako. He already gave me a huge trauma. And that trauma will never fade easily. It will take a lot of time to heal. And healing takes time. The wounds on my heart will not easily heal no matter how many times he apologises to me.