The Ruthless Queen

Chapter 49

Nyx POV

Fates a bitch isn't it? You think you have your entire life planned out accordingly. Almost a perfectly planned out life. Next thing you know BAM fate takes you by surprise through another round of hell. I know what happen to me isn't my fault. I know what happen to me is going to cause my death. At least I get to die at home. At least I get to meet lucifer himself and talk about the good times chill maybe throw back a couple.

They say death is peaceful. In reality it's a fucking pain in the ass. I've had to fight my favorite person, Death many times. Not physically, mentally and that's the worst part about this shit. Death loves my visits. I hate it, I hate fighting for my survival, I hate the battle for whatever awates me, and I hate that I fucking love every single thing that happens when I'm on the brink of death. But the real question is, will death win this time or will I finally lose the battle?

I know what I've been through is life threatening. I've accepted the fact I'll die today from what happen. Only thing that concerns me is will everyone else or will they grieve and blame themselves the entire time? I hate that I care, I hate that I'm starting to accept the fact I am loved by people, I hate that I love these feelings too. Why did life deal me such a shitty hand? I will fight, fight till I dont have anymore strength in me.

It's dark here, my mind is spiraling. I hear what's happening to me. I hear what my doctor is saying. I hear that I keep coding. I hear that I need blood. But the thing is, this darkness is taking over me. I dont know if I can take it much longer. I feel like I've been here forever. I suppose that's what happens when your in your own mind for hours upon hours unless it's been longer. I'm really not sure how much fight is left, I feel weaker and weaker.

Maybe it's truly my time. Maybe I really am done fighting. I hope after all this is over River is okay. Ironic right? I'm fighting for my life here and still thinking of him. Mother fucker I'm feeling numb. I feel my life draining. Hell will be a blast, get to go back to torturing my enemies again, over and over. Also get to meet my best friend lucifer.

I think it's time for me to rest now.....

River POV

Shit, shit, shit it's like I'm never going to get a break. As soon as I fucking confess my feelings and find out they're not just one way the torture began. Then I collapsed holding her hand. At least I was with her, that's all I care about. I wouldn't mind dying knowing I'm loved by her. Thats the best thing about it.

Its dark here, I feel weak. I hate feeling weak. I hate the feeling of not being able to be strong. I suppose it's all in the mind. I have a strong mind, I'm going to fight. I want to be home, with Nyx. I feel alone. I never like being alone. I'm starting to feel cold. I'm getting really tired. Maybe a simple snooze will do me good. It might make my body stronger maybe weaker, lucifer knows what.

Is their rest their death?....